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Felix
Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 78
USA

0 posted 2000-01-06 12:12 PM


cloudy skies
means time apart

tied in knots
like a child's shoelace

flashing lights
trouble

a guy on the drums
Flutterby
the winged unicorn
storybooks
that tell my life

a painting on the wall
catches my eye

no one matches
not even the coffee
with cream
an ear
a mouth

if i was barefoot
the floors would be cold
in the morning

rain
a good day

the trees
no worries
none to please
just
trees
< !signature-->

 Did you ever read about a frog who dreamed of being a king, and then became one?

- Neil Diamond




[This message has been edited by Felix (edited 01-06-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Stacey Sutton - All Rights Reserved
Kevin
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 1999-11-02
Posts 729
Torrington, Ct, Usa
1 posted 2000-01-06 12:43 PM


i love your sudlties...forgive my spelling i have 6 doses of robbitussim in me...darn flu
beautiful poem, and am i disslexic for reading flutterby as butterfly about 6 times lol

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

2 posted 2000-01-06 01:24 AM


Hi, Felix. I liked your poem, especially the lines about no one to please but the trees and the one about if you were barefoot, the floor would be cold in the morning (get some carpet!) Those are paraphrases, of course. There were a few places where I got confused, where the imagery seemed a little out of place, but on the whole, a very cool piece of wordage.

Mike

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

3 posted 2000-01-06 05:06 AM


Excellent!

I don't think I have seen your work before - and I do like this - have a belated welcome to Passions from me.

K

 '...I want to be free - free to know people and their backgrounds - free to move to different parts of the world...' Sylvia Plath

Felix
Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 78
USA
4 posted 2000-01-06 02:43 PM


Kevin- sorry you're sick...hope you get feeling better soon.

Mike- I'd explain it but it would take a whole page... so I'll do one little part.
  "a guy on the drums.....tell my life"
First I guess I must tell you that CG stands for Common Grounds...it's a coffee shop and they were having live music that night...and the guy on the drums kept eyein me (he was gorgeous!! and yes he ended up with my number). Flutterby etc. describes how I was feeling from that (It's an old children's book character....a winged unicorn).

Severn-I have definately seen some of your work my dear...and my compliments. This IS the first time I've posted in this forum.


 Did you ever read about a frog who dreamed of being a king, and then became one?

- Neil Diamond



bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

5 posted 2000-01-07 12:10 PM


Hi, Felix. When you explained the title, I was ... what's the word? Dumbfounded's a lame word, but it'll have to do. It's an interesting bit of coincidence. I'm an editorial assistant at the Daily News in Los Angeles (well, a 'burb of L.A.), and one of my responsibilities is to type up the club listings. Common Grounds happens to be one of them. I doubt it's the same place, though, unless you're talkin' SoCal. Anyway, keep writing!

Mike

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

6 posted 2000-01-07 08:32 AM


Felix - that is a lovely thing to say - thankyou very much!




insect
Senior Member
since 2000-04-22
Posts 1014

7 posted 2000-11-15 01:22 AM


Love your poem
Trying to find more

For you

I love the woods, forest and all the trees
Love the outdoors, take me please
Sweet scent of nature
But I'm just a little creature

An insect that lands on your leg
Overwhelmed by a hunger almost making insect beg
For just a little bite of your sweet soft skin
Then I fly away leaving a mark where I've been

Only to circle and try again
It's just a small bite not much pain
More like a nip giving you an itch
Your body reacts and starts to twitch

insect has made himself aware
Your twitching body tells you he's there


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