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Severn
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-17

Posts 7704

0 posted 2000-01-04 06:32 AM

...Singing...

vivid tuneful
from loving throats
our own maestros
were we

and now...

we stutter

the us has fainted
into the pit
the violins stilled
and loneliness
echoes

‘round the chambers
empty

I wonder perhaps
are you happy in your silence?

Or
sometimes
in your quieted hall
do you
catch
a

note
a sigh of chord

and remember

I couldn’t orchestrate
a sea to fold
or lands to join

time to erase
the places
of our
birthing

but I orchestrate
myself

and my music
lives
I have not forgotten

the
treble note
a bird called once

transformed
in an opera
of trust

now feathered away
carried to the roof
and escaped

yes

there I am
waiting
in abandoned wings

only
with the music
of alone

...that is the way of it...

I catch the refrain

and acquiesce

here...

so far...

5.01.2000

...I am not a painter, I am a poet... F. O'Hara

DreamEvil
Member Elite

since 1999-06-22

Posts 2396

1 posted 2000-01-04 06:53 AM

Kamla this is a heartbreaking verse artfully crafted (double helix again my friend, it suits you). It calls with a siren song of longing and despair yet I catch more than a hint of strength to this piece and thus to you.< !signature-->

Now and forever, my heart hears ~one voice~.
DreamEvil©
-------------------------------------------------------
"Either kill me or take me as I am,
because I'll be damned if I ever change..."

Count Donatien Alphonse Francois de Sade
(Marquis de Sade)

[This message has been edited by DreamEvil (edited 01-04-2000).]

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-11-08

Posts 9269
Pennsylvania

2 posted 2000-01-04 07:10 AM

Kamla, You, my dear, can orchestrate anything with your talent! Seas fold and lands join in your hands. This is quite exquisite.
Liz

whiskey

Senior Member

since 1999-12-28

Posts 1278
Australia

3 posted 2000-01-04 09:03 AM

Severn,
This is wonderful, well done

Songbird
Member Elite

since 1999-12-15

Posts 2184
Missouri

4 posted 2000-01-04 09:31 AM

So beatiful, and written very well.

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

5 posted 2000-01-04 10:55 AM

Kamala, this is absolutely beautiful...a song in itself and so haunting in it's note. Please, please get some of this stuff out to some publishers. You write a very mean free verse

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

6 posted 2000-01-04 11:02 AM

Gorgeous Kamla, pass the oxygen please.

In the dew of little things,
the heart finds its morning
and is refreshed.
(ee cummings)

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

7 posted 2000-01-04 05:30 PM

Sad and wonderful, Kamla! I enjoyed this very much!

Denise

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

8 posted 2000-01-04 05:39 PM

My awe continues. Your song will always be sweet, Kamla.

Seaangel
Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 167
Auckland, New Zealand

9 posted 2000-01-05 04:43 AM

Beautiful, K, and I love the musical theme.

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

10 posted 2001-06-15 09:11 AM

                                                                           the
                                                                     treble note
                                                                   a bird called once

                                                                     transformed
                                                                     in an opera
                                                                      of trust

                                                                  now feathered away
                                                                   carried to the roof
                                                                     and escaped

                                                                        yes

                                                                      there I am
                                                                      waiting
                                                                  in abandoned wings

                                                                       only
                                                                    with the music
                                                                      of alone

I am so glad I found this Kamla, it's so beautiful in its sadness, especially loved the above lines hon

Maree

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

11 posted 2002-01-17 02:43 PM

Depends on which side of that silence you are on I suppose dear.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

12 posted 2002-07-07 03:34 AM

I don't get to see your work as often anymore.
Enjoyed this older one.

I will not bend to the cowardice of a silent judgement.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

13 posted 2004-06-06 01:47 PM

excellent

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