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Open Poetry #5
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Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia

0 posted 2000-01-03 06:15 PM


Had I not loved you
I would not love
Your voice still beckons me to peace,
A place we only knew in dreams,
A place we only knew in dreams.

To see beyond
Those emerald eyes,
To see what you saw,
That fire that burned me to cinders,
I call to you in dreams,
I call to you in dreams.


In the morning,
I hear you laugh,
As the sky fills with sunlight.


In the evening,
I feel you touch my cheek,
As you breathe against my skin,
And a teardrop falls,
Or was that the rain?


Those eyes,
Those emerald eyes,
In them I saw tomorrow.
Those sleeping eyes;
Rest now my love.
Rest now my love.


I am glad that it is I that miss you.
For I would walk the fire,
To spare you this.
Rest now my love.




 How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it. -Marcus Aurelius

© Copyright 2000 Local Rebel - All Rights Reserved
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

1 posted 2000-01-03 06:26 PM


I am still reeling from the reading. The most tender words I have found in so many days.

Dear LadyClaire

Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
2 posted 2000-01-03 06:37 PM


Wow, beautiful piece, LR.  The last stanza really grabs the heart.  Well done.

Michael

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
3 posted 2000-01-03 06:52 PM


The first two lines make this very special....and the remaining ones are excellent. This is very good writing.
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
4 posted 2000-01-03 07:22 PM


Thank you masters!

Meadowmuse -- I was still reeling when I wrote it -- but it was a long time ago.  I find writing in the heat of the moment therapeutic -- but it is even more so to look back and see how far I've come.

Thanks again

Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906
Sitting in Michael's Lap
5 posted 2000-01-03 07:24 PM


This verse left me with a moment's peace.  Thank you.  

--Kess


 You cannot choose the way of your death, but the path you choose will determine its own end.


Marilyn
Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada
6 posted 2000-01-03 07:37 PM


This was simply amazing. Very well written and it spoke to my heart.

Rest now my love.

Bojopy
Member
since 2000-01-03
Posts 391

7 posted 2000-01-03 07:42 PM


The first lines just grabbed me and the rest flowed within it. Great work!!!..........Bojopy



 


RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023
United Kingdom
8 posted 2000-01-03 07:48 PM


Yes but, think of the love you gave, that she gave and that you both shared...

Peace sweetheart, peace

HUSG

 Don't ask me where I'm going, just listen when I'm gone and far away you'll hear me singing softly to the dawn.


Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
9 posted 2000-01-03 07:48 PM


()
()
()
Teardrops fall from my eyes
whispered words felt as sighs
love spoken dreamily thus
we thank you for sharing with us.

patchoulipumpkin
Member
since 2000-01-01
Posts 196
Bermuda
10 posted 2000-01-03 07:50 PM


Beautiful, the last stanza is incredible, it put me in a very pensive frame of mind.  REally amazing, thanks.
Deborah
Junior Member
since 2000-01-03
Posts 41

11 posted 2000-01-03 08:43 PM


So touching and somehow so sad, it really reached my heart.
    Deborah

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

12 posted 2000-01-03 09:16 PM


Heartwrenchingly beautiful. Very sad.

 Denise


hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
13 posted 2000-01-03 11:23 PM


Haunting
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
14 posted 2000-01-04 07:01 AM


Oh yes..... I love seeing the "other side" of our resident rebels..... Back for another round with ya!!!
:

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
15 posted 2000-01-04 07:13 AM


This is one that will long be remembered by many of us, I'm sure
Liz

whiskey
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 1999-12-28
Posts 1278
Australia
16 posted 2000-01-04 09:06 AM


This is wonderful, Touched my heart in so many ways, simply excellent  
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
17 posted 2000-01-04 09:24 AM


Such wonderful compliments.  Thank you all.

RG -- thanks for the husg!  HuggsZ!!

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
18 posted 2000-01-04 09:46 AM


Heartbreaking and beautiful, LR!!!
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
19 posted 2000-01-04 10:04 AM


Very well done my friend....It brought back memories to me......(Okay, so the memories were kinda like; "Toerag, get your ass over here, I'm gonna give you a "piece" of my mind).....but that is kinda "Your voice beckons me to peace" isn't it?
Iloveit
Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121
NM
20 posted 2000-01-04 11:04 AM


ahemmmmm ahemmmmmm, am going to try to be serious following that hilarious reply....lol thanks toe....

really beautiful.....sigh.....
"I am glad that it is I that miss you"

this poem speaks volumes about the man that you are......really precious....and yes, thank you for sharing ......big hugs my friend

Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 1999-09-17
Posts 1495
Canyon Country, CA
21 posted 2000-01-05 11:35 AM


L.R, this is truly wonderful!

 ~*~ ^i^ ~*~ Love is such a lonely art, and death is but a taste. Minds are merely instruments that often go to waste! ~*~ ^i^ ~*~

poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646
Arkansas
22 posted 2000-01-06 04:01 PM


Softly spoken dear sir....romantically peaceful....

What else can I say following all these rave reviews!?!?!?!   I didn't know you had it in you to write something so......*romantic*  !!      LMAO  


 ** I'm reaching for the brightest star I've ever seen - knock my ladder out from under me, and you'll wish you hadn't !! -pFF ** Here's to 2000!

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
23 posted 2000-01-06 04:14 PM


Stunningly done.  The first two and the last two--perfectly capture the feeling.
Pepper
Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079
Southern Florida
24 posted 2000-01-06 08:51 PM


This is breathtakingly beautiful.So very tender and loving...
I placed it in my favorites file...

 A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire!
Shannon



Betty Gravitt
Member
since 1999-09-11
Posts 222
Georgia United States
25 posted 2000-01-06 08:57 PM


So tender and loving. ((((HUGS))))

 B Gravitt



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