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Passions in Poetry

Heart and Air

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Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 07-17-99
Posts 8273


0 posted 12-29-1999 06:06 AM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Severn

Heart and Air


There lies
in a heart pulse
a twist of life
everything infant known

that new born laugh
first cry at light
joy and loss life-found

Yet emptiness between
beats
                      discords
and you

stop.

So subtle quick
the body wrench

quiet

have you ever felt
between each
caress of blood push

lifeless?

We take our next breath
convinced
of one to follow

too fast they move
for regard
for care

these precious intakes
of staple air

and blood rolls
from the romantic organ

sung to
and honoured
in poem and song

our life giver
of more than love alone

~

Catch the loss
between a pulse
and treasure your living

more

Feel a gasp
of empty lungs
even as they fill

But

surrender yourself
to complacency

and

forget the reason
we sight and sing
at all

*Inspired by dear Liz
who knows the true preciousness
of blood and air*


29.12.99




 ...I am not a painter, I am a poet... F. O'Hara
© Copyright 1999 Kamla Mahony - All Rights Reserved
Michael
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 08-13-99
Posts 6333
California


1 posted 12-29-1999 06:14 AM       View Profile for Michael   Email Michael   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Michael

Wow, Severn.
   I cannot tell you how this one hit home for me.  After losing 1/2 a lung in June, there is nothing in life I will ever take for granted...especially a breath of air.  This is written wonderfully ...  Great job!

Michael
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 11-08-1999
Posts 9405
Pennsylvania


2 posted 12-29-1999 06:17 AM       View Profile for Elizabeth Santos   Email Elizabeth Santos   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Elizabeth Santos

Kamla,
Oh!, I was already gasping for air before I reached the end of the poem, Now you leave me breathless!
This is a wonderful poem, one of your best, and there is too much here to comment on. Your talent sparkles!
This is wonderful!
Love ya,
Liz
Betty Gravitt
Member
since 09-11-99
Posts 225
Georgia United States


3 posted 12-29-1999 06:20 AM       View Profile for Betty Gravitt   Email Betty Gravitt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Betty Gravitt

Never never take anything for granted. Tomorow it could be gone. Lovely Severn.

 B Gravitt


First__Knight
Senior Member
since 11-08-1999
Posts 688


4 posted 12-29-1999 06:25 AM       View Profile for First__Knight   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for First__Knight

This was layed out so well...Like the heart beat....and the breath between them..I like it  

 I have learned that the pain of a lost love will fade, But the memory of having loved will last forever.

Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 08-02-99
Posts 9130
Purgatorial Incarceration


5 posted 12-29-1999 07:35 AM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher

Geez K! It's far too early in the morning for me to be reading something like this!
Echoes of some deep thinking here m'dear. One does take things for granted often, and usually regrets it at a later time.
This has to be one of your best in quite some time!
jbouder
Member Elite
since 09-18-99
Posts 2641
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash


6 posted 12-29-1999 07:58 AM       View Profile for jbouder   Email jbouder   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jbouder

Severn:

Can't say much more than ... "wow".  This is outstanding.  After "lifeless", I started counting my breaths.  Too bad this isn't CA.  This one is worthy of discussion.


 Jim

"If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther

whiskey
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 12-28-1999
Posts 1302
Australia


7 posted 12-29-1999 08:51 AM       View Profile for whiskey   Email whiskey   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit whiskey's Home Page   View IP for whiskey

Wonderful poem , took my breath away , so beautifully written  
caroline
Senior Member
since 08-16-99
Posts 1251
http://members.xoom.com/bellad


8 posted 12-29-1999 10:38 AM       View Profile for caroline   Email caroline   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for caroline

Extremely awesome, my dear!!!  Nothing can convince me that you are not the Queen of Freeverse!       

Brava!


 It's not the love you fear, but the fall from the height~Edwin McCain


hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


9 posted 12-29-1999 10:52 AM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Kamla...you have a knack for experimenting with your freeverse in a way that aids dramatically to the reading of it. This is laid out perfectly and draws attention and breaks the thought right in the areas it needs to do so. I applaud your talent  
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


10 posted 12-29-1999 10:57 AM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Kamla, this is a most wonderous poem.  You continue to impress me with your words.  You flow and glow and grow each time I read something new.

 In the dew of little things,
the heart finds its morning
and is refreshed.
(ee cummings)
Tamera
Member
since 12-28-1999
Posts 126


11 posted 12-29-1999 02:18 PM       View Profile for Tamera   Email Tamera   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Tamera

As i read this I was holding my breath, waiting to breathe...wonderful!
Tamera
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


12 posted 12-29-1999 02:41 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Geez, it's all been said and I agree with every word. Another awesome piece of work. No one has a bigger romantic organ than you yourself!
Eloise
Senior Member
since 11-27-1999
Posts 1115
Wyoming


13 posted 12-29-1999 02:46 PM       View Profile for Eloise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Eloise

Echoes of above Kamla.  Very well done.
jbouder
Member Elite
since 09-18-99
Posts 2641
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash


14 posted 12-29-1999 02:59 PM       View Profile for jbouder   Email jbouder   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jbouder

Geeze, Balladeer ... the places a depraved mind such as mine could run with THAT comment!  
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 07-17-99
Posts 8273


15 posted 12-29-1999 04:38 PM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

Michael - that is so awful for you to have gone through. How are you now? I'm glad to have connected with you through this - consider it dedicated to you now too!
And thankyou my friend.

Lizzy - breathe breathe! Thankyou hon.

Betty - I agree so much. Thanks.

FKnight - Thankyou! I think I've said before that layout just sort of sneaks up on me - I designed some of it, but now that I look at it after being distanced I see what you mean! LOL.

Chris - yes, an astute observation for that early in the morning. Thankyou King DT

Jim - hehe, wouldn't want to get me started (or you!) Thanks!

Whiskey - thanks very much.

Caroline -

But Mistress Best
I must contest...

hang on...been here before haven't I?
LOL! Thankyou my friend.

Ruth - that means a lot. Wow. Thanks.

Martie - I can only say the same for you, truly. Thankyou.

Tamera LOL - hope you have recovered! Thanks.

'deer - thanks, I think?   hehe - You know your words mean the world my friend.

Eloise - thankyou!

Jim - You leave Balladeer alone...

K



 ...I am not a painter, I am a poet... F. O'Hara
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 12-27-1999
Posts 3317


16 posted 12-29-1999 07:13 PM       View Profile for Meadowmuse   Email Meadowmuse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Meadowmuse's Home Page   View IP for Meadowmuse

This is exceptional in message and verse. Awakening to the gift of each precious breath quite recently, this piece touches me acutely. Thank you.
Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 11-15-1999
Posts 1691
Georgia, Fulton


17 posted 12-29-1999 07:21 PM       View Profile for Nate Dogg   Email Nate Dogg   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nate Dogg's Home Page   View IP for Nate Dogg

Great freeverse, Severn. How often do we take these things for granted too.

 Nathan
Isis
Member Ascendant
since 09-06-99
Posts 6390
Sunny Queensland


18 posted 12-29-1999 08:00 PM       View Profile for Isis   Email Isis   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Isis's Home Page   View IP for Isis

Kamla, wise words indeed we should take nothing in this life for granted.  Right down to the air, the sun and the rain.  This was wonderful, I think, in my opinion one of your best  

 At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet. (Plato)
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)

Astraea
Member
since 11-09-1999
Posts 397
California! Yeah! Okay, I'm


19 posted 12-29-1999 08:07 PM       View Profile for Astraea   Email Astraea   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Astraea

What a lovely thought about something people take for granted for.  Very nice.

~Astraea

 "Sometimes stars can only be seen in darkness."

"Sorrow's crown of sorrow is remembering happier things."

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


20 posted 12-29-1999 09:02 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

Wise and wonderful and beautiful! Very lovely, Kamla!

 Denise


Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


21 posted 12-30-1999 04:48 AM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

WoW, I don't know what to say, your poem has left me both breathless and speachless!


 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~

RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


22 posted 12-31-1999 10:37 AM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Severn: It has all been said, so I'll just sit back, sigh and read it again..

HUGS

 Don't ask me where I'm going, just listen when I'm gone and far away you'll hear me singing softly to the dawn.

Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member
since 08-26-99
Posts 1064
northern mountains, Idaho


23 posted 12-31-1999 01:27 PM       View Profile for Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Email Rosemary J. Gwaltney   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Rosemary J. Gwaltney's Home Page   View IP for Rosemary J. Gwaltney

Deep, poignant thoughts, delicately worded, and set in a unique form which adds so much to it!  I really appreciated this unusual and thought-provoking piece!
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 07-17-99
Posts 8273


24 posted 01-01-2000 06:10 AM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn

Meadow - You're welcome - but thankYOU - for reading and your gracious comment.  

Nathan - indeed, those thoughts are what prompted this. Thanks!

Isis - My friend - that means much, thankyou!!!

Astraea - Thankyou indeed...  

Denise - thankyou, O lady of the sonnets.

Echo - it is wonderful to think that my words can have that affect - I appreciate it, thanks.

RG - thankyou, huggy One!  

Rosemary - wow, thanks!


K

 ...I am not a painter, I am a poet... F. O'Hara
 
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