Martie, Sunshine, Larry,
Thank you for your kind words, I feel for anyone who has suffered a loss, experience is no help. February is also not a good time for us as this is when our daughter passed away also.
We are in the middle of carrying out the necessary arrangements and following an autopsy it looks like the funeral may be on Friday.
In a couple of responses I have mentioned 'King of Terrors' a piece of poetry now in the public domain and I have posted this below. If this is not permitted on this site please feel free to remove it, I will not be offended, but I do feel it means a lot to those who have lost somebody close to them.
The King of Terrors
Death is nothing at all. It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.
Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.
Life means all that it ever meant
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner.
All is well. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.
One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!'
So the face speaks. Surely while we speak there is a smile flitting over it; a smile as of gentle fun at the trick played us by seeming death...'
Henry Scott Holland (1847-1918)
Canon of St. Paul's Cathedral