How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 pipTalk Lounge
 Online journals and privacy
 1 2 3 4 5
Follow us on Facebook

 Moderated by: Ron   (Admins )

User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Not Available
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

Online journals and privacy

 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 02-07-2002
Posts 3337
Beneath the northern stars

0 posted 03-18-2005 01:42 AM       View Profile for skyshine   Email skyshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit skyshine's Home Page   View IP for skyshine

I'm not talking about the interactive journals people keep on this site; rather I am referring to places like Is anyone else uncomfortable with a friend/relative/acquaintance/whatever keeping an oneline journal and mentioning everyone they know by name and detail?? I mean, if you read the entries some people post there, you have not only their information (i.e. name, age, location etc.) but that of their friends and family as well. For example, something like this:

"I am so excited to be going home to Pleasantville for spring break!! Things at Any State University are ok, but [whatever town Any State University happens to be located in] is SUCH a boring place. Nothing much to do there but the typical 'college town' activities (pizza, bowling, the mall, movie rentals, you know). It'll be great to be home and see my family, especially because my younger brother Johnny is graduating from high school in June, and everyone's excited about that. I also can't wait to catch up with my best friend, Jane Smith. With her at Any Other State University and me here at Any State, we've only had time to email and talk on the phone once in a while. She's studying to be a pediatrician, so you know how it is, she's really busy with her classes and whatnot. Well, gotta go finish packing. Hope you all are doing well!! --Karen"

Just an example, but you see what I mean? Look at all the personal info that was in that paragraph--names, locations, references to peoples' ages, etc. A lot of people I know have online journals, as do I, but I've about given up on mine for these reasons. Do we have the right, in any way, to divulge others' personal information? Granted, the example I used did not involve last names, but often people will do exactly that in their journal. Is any one else besides me really uncomfortable with this??

They way you live your life is up to you, but dying is NOT an option!!

Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 02-15-2001
Posts 4465

1 posted 03-18-2005 04:20 AM       View Profile for Marshalzu   Email Marshalzu   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marshalzu's Home Page   View IP for Marshalzu

I am uncomfortable about online journals but for perhaps a whole different reason, I was in a relationship with a girl who used livejournal. Almost everytime I visted it I would find commentary on our relationship, sometimes that could be pretty humiliating. There are some things that should be kept out of online journals.
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839

2 posted 03-18-2005 04:58 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

I had one journal in this forum, and I asked that it be locked for several reasons, the main one being that it was taking up a lot of my time to maintain. But yes, I found myself asking myself this same question as well.

Most of my stories there were from years ago, and the ones that included my sisters, well, they seemed okay with it. They are rather like me in the attitude, "It's what happened, so what?"

But as I shared stories from the past, I had a friend quibble the point with me that it wasn't actually a journal, since it only dealt with the past. So...I offered up a dose of "my today" which was a not-so-nice viewpoint of an argument with me and my husband. Then I was accused of airing my dirty laundry in public. So yanno? I figured if you can't please everyone, you've got to please yourself, so I had the damned thing locked. As for the questions of did I invade the privacy of my husband by sharing our life with the world without his permission?

Maybe. But frankly, I feel the key words to the question I asked above is "our life"--it happens to be MINE too. I wanted to remind him of that. The entry showed an ugly side of BOTH of us, and I chose to share it as an uncomfortable look at the pure venom that can spew forth in an unhappy marital situation. It just is what it is...

As for whether or not I feel any regret for invading um, "his" privacy (is it an invasion of privacy to write what was screamed at the top of our lungs?) I happen to think that it sent a clear message to him at the time.

It's my life too. If I exposed some bad behaviors on his part, he should know I exposed my own as well.

He knows now that I'm willing to tell it all, and as I did tell him, "Consider yourself fortunate that I haven't as yet told my stories in court."

But I did ask an adminstrator lock that particular journal. There's another journal out there that I chose to keep more private as it exposes a lot of negative aspects of myself and others--some of it illegal.

Good question though, skyshine. It seems more urgent now, given the speed of information transfer with today's technology (anybody care to discuss cellphone photography?) but the question actually has been around for some time.

Truman Capote once wrote a thinly veiled tell-all of the elite, and yes, he was then deemed untrustworthy by his own inner circle. Comedians often comment that loved ones and friends became more guarded in their behavior around them when it became apparent that "everything" was fair game in the quest for entertaining new material.

So you see, the question can be applied across the board for I believe, all of the arts.

I personally feel that a line had to be drawn for me, which is why I chose not to detail the tribulations of HIS medical problems and my sometimes futile attempts at caregiving. But I did do just that for awhile, and it did help (me) to have an outlet for my frustration.

Some days I thought I would just I did, within the pages of my journal.

It's a personal decision though, and I won't attempt to define ethics for everyone.

There's just me, and what I have to live up to (and with) and I wouldn't dream of laying that on anyone else. But do understand that if you decide to share details of your life, people around you may become more guarded as a result, and yanno? I'd prolly do the same.

So good luck to you, whatever you may decide. And may all of your journal entries be joyful.

Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart

3 posted 03-18-2005 05:17 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

What Serenity said, and quite well, I might add. It's a personal choice. Discretion is always key - and turn-about is fair play, "do unto others", all of that, including "what's good for the goose..." ad nauseum.

Now, a private journal is also helpful. But the key word there is private. And perhaps "journal" is the wrong word for my own posts, which are more along the line of "come share the better part of my life with me" type entries.

Sometimes there's some fun in there...sometimes they are just mental meanderings that some folks will feel akin to; others will toss off as "so what?" And that's ok. Because I'm not living my life for others, just friends and family.

And boy, do I have a BIG [poetic] family.
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 09-09-2000
Posts 10848
In Your Poetic Mind

4 posted 03-18-2005 05:45 PM       View Profile for Greeneyes   Email Greeneyes   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Greeneyes

allows you to invite and share with who you decide to, no one can have access unless you give it to them.....I keep in touch with family there .... it also allows uploading of pictures, it's neat because living so far away from my parents and siblings they can see my girls anytime they want to.....have a look around there....maybe it is what you are looking for with a little more privacy?

I'm Standing on a bridge
I'm waitin in the dark
I thought that you'd be here by now
Theres nothing but the rain

Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

5 posted 03-18-2005 06:52 PM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

I am guarded of my own thoughts. But, I am here, there and everywhere in-between. So, if I can be explored into a depth that tantamounts to abuse of privacy, so be it.

I am wary. Wary enough. That is before even stumbling upon the abuse of personal information.

What I am saying is, however private/personal whatever online journals are, I wouldn't name a person I know who wouldn't like to be known/spoken about.

I realised this when I was 10. Maybe when I was 12. Somewhere in between. But people can be naive and because of their naievity (spelling?) others can be affected. But it is not the fault of a web-site.

One should endeavour to be smart.

My 2 paisas (paisa is 1/100th of a rupee)

thanks for letting me here...
 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Discussion >> pipTalk Lounge >> Online journals and privacy Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Not Available
Print Send ECard


pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary

© Passions in Poetry and 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors