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Passions in Poetry

The Serenity Garden (journal part II)

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Sunshine
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since 06-25-99
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Listening to every heart


300 posted 07-31-2004 07:25 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Jo?  I knew it...
I just knew you'd be "alright!"

~*~

Serene one...I thought that wedding was yesterday...good gads...how did two years slip by?

Do I wish a happy?  Or just give a to see you through it all?  Or both?  Let me know...I'm ready with both...and then some...

Jo, I loved your story...

Karen...I saw you stepping up onto that stage.

~*~

What keeps me amazed as I look around this tender garden, are the varied and various writing styles of all of our moths, butterflies, and flowers.  Even beams of light skip around in varied and sundry ways.  

It is truly a Garden Party in here...and when the shrubs, bushes and trees start talking [the males] then it becomes a glorious midsummer's valley of intrique and delight, fancy free in its sincerity and honest release of inhibitions...

Sigh.

It smells so good in here...
Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


301 posted 07-31-2004 07:48 AM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

Nancy and Chris...those memories and photos are priceless... so cool...thank you for sharing.

Sen? ... your generosity garden continues to grow more and more lovely...and best part? No weeds.

These concert stories are worth gold..all the memories being exchanged are....
These sharings of spirit are so full of heart equity...
mothy-heart-hugs to all here.

just wanted to stop in and say hello, took a little quiet morning time to catch up before another day of real estate adventures begin... We had 2 inches of rain Friday early morn... most of the houses we looked at yesterday had lake front property..IN THE BASEMENTS!!   *sigh* ...
I already have that here in this house...why go to the trouble of moving?? sheeesh.
Im surprised my landlord hasnt raised the rent for all the scenic creeks that flow thru this basement...LOL

Anyway...we search on...looking for a groovy kitchen and hopefully dry basement.

Ya see when ya live in the midwest...(nick named Tornado Alley)..basements are something we hold out for. LOL

But this whole moving thing is such a pain...
Still cant convince the family that a BAGO ON THE BEACH would be soooooo cool.
Where is their sense of adventure???
Where are their priorities???

So forgive me the many poems missed...I've hardly been home for the past 3 weeks...we've looked at about 50 houses now...and drove right on by half that amount. LOL

I keep asking the agent...
WHERE IS THE BEACH FRONT PROPERTY????

Have a groovy day gals and guys.

serenity blaze
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since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


302 posted 07-31-2004 07:55 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Kari? Well, not sure if it answers your question, but myself? I will be observing the sabbat--Lammas.

There's a story behind it of course, but it's kind of sad.

In retrospect, I believe I deliberately chose that date because it coincided with the estimated date of my Dad's final chemo treatment date--about a month after his final dose. Y'see, I'd had it all planned.

He was going to get better, and he would be there to "give me away".

He tried very hard to make it too, but I was in denial. He'd told me in the hospital I should just bring the justice of the peace there and I said, "no--you're going to make it."

I guess I screwed up again, because not only did my Dad not make it through July, my future father-in-law passed away unexpectedly the following week as well.

I spent that August 1 greeting the mourners at his wake, just eight days after my Dad's services.

So when it came time to choose a date again, I figured I'd been so stubborn about August 1 that I might as well keep the date.

We stopped at the cemetary immediately after the nuptials and I left my Dad my bouquet.

I guess it's just as well.

I will never allow myself to be "given" away from my Dad anyhow. He's half of me, so that is pretty much impossible.

And please, folks, don't go thinking I'm horribly sad. It has been a very rough ride these past few years, but I think I am finally coming to some sense of peace.

They are all with me--every time I share them with all of you.

So...thanks.



now tell me some stories?

And see, Jan my moth-groovy lady, you are proof that there is much in life to celebrate!

love you
Sunshine
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303 posted 07-31-2004 08:05 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Yes, Ser, I remember all of that.  It was a really rough, tumbling time for you, and I ached to get down there and see you through it.  I so want to come back to your neck of the woods...

Let me go find a story.  I think I see one rumbling around somewhere...

ah...a memory is stirring...

~*~

JM...no kidding...basements are the must have...and if one is lucky, they're dry.  Find a house on a small knoll, m'dear...we stay a bit drier that way...
Sunshine
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304 posted 07-31-2004 08:38 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

The First Round

It’s too bad that our intuition kicks in after the fact, sometimes.  But on the other hand, I’ve two bright spots in my life over a good idea gone bad…

Oh, my mind and body tried SO hard to tell me I was making the worst moves of all times.  

I mean, my folks tried to gently tell me that maybe I should wait on going through with that first marriage and all.

If there is one thing that I’ve been told over and over again by several well-meaning people, and that is, I have a very low self-esteem problem.  No kidding.  But, hey, someone has to be in that group of folk so that others look good, right?

You see…the first love got all the good stuff.  He got the virgin, he got in the first jab *smile* and…he fairly convinced me in all silent aspects of demeanor that if I didn’t marry him, no one else would want me.  [I had the distinct impression I was now damaged goods…and he let me continue to think that way.]  I opted to at least get my first year of college under my belt.  While this was going on, my mother learned that, as we talked of marriage plans, this guy was going to whisk me 2/3rds the way across the nation.  That didn’t sit well, so she quit talking to everyone, as I have spoken to somewhere in one of these two garden parties.

Well, my older “adopted” sister tried to gently convince me that I needed to let this guy “grow up”.  Oh, I felt so old and wise when I told her that I would help him do so…he needed some direction, you see, and I wanted to be there so watch him meet his successes.  [Oh, the things over which I convinced myself….]

My grandmother mumbled things like “babies and bathwater…”

My aunt just smiled that enigmatic smile of hers…she was on husband number three…

Skip forward then, to the night before the wedding.  There I lay in my little virginal bed, trying to see, in my mind, his face.  I couldn’t even picture it.  I got out of bed and looked at a photo, and wondered, “who the hell IS this guy?”

But we had some 250 people coming tomorrow.  I couldn’t back out now.  It’s just jitters, right?

Sigh.

Saturday morning found me wide awake – I hadn’t slept all night.  [This is the cute part.  I heard Mom get up, walk quietly to the bedroom door, close it, and “snap” lock it.  What in the….oh!  OH!  Oh, wow….after 20 years, and they still DO IT???  Wow….]

I tiptoed down the hallway and closed the hallway door, and went about making coffee and doing little things to get my mind off of what was coming up.  Later Mom came in first…and she, not being a morning person, was smiling.  I grinned, and didn’t say a word.  I was just glad that I had always been right in one thing – that my parents were very, very much in love.

The household started moving around, getting ready for “the day”.  I put off the nagging feeling that I couldn’t picture my fiancé’s face from the night before, I just kept putting one foot in front of the other.  I was going to dress at the church, so we all headed for the cars – the wedding was at 11:00…we were out the door by 10:00.  Plenty of time.

The Methodist Church was pretty – the flowers were in place, I was told to “quit doing and go get dressed”…so amid the smiling faces of my grandmother, my aunt, and my mother, I literally stepped into my gown from the seat of a chair so we wouldn’t muss the hairdo and all.  [Hmmmm, I have an old photo of that somewhere, I think.  If I can find it…you’ll all have a great laugh….but on second thought, I may need to send it at request via e-mail….I wouldn’t want to have to censor myself…*wink*]

So we took a few photos, I’m not thinking of anything except if everyone else was doing ok, when the door opened and my brother said, “it’s time.”

I froze.  

I mean, I wasn’t going anywhere.  I couldn’t talk.  I couldn’t move.  I wasn’t really sure if I was breathing.  Voices of my family seemed to be very far away.  No, the bodice wasn’t too tight…it was that inner voice saying, “don’t go there”.  

From a far away distance, even though she was but two feet away, my grandmother said, “here, I brought this, in case,” and someone held a vial of ammonia under my nose.  Well, that brings one back to reality in a thump.

They had me sit down for a few minutes as my knees started to buckle, and then with a resolve from only God knows where, I stood up and said, “let’s get this over with.”  You would’ve thought I was walking to the guillotine.  

Then, even after all of the rehearsal, and with all of the church to hear…my Dad, who had been given three alternate ways to say the words by which to give me away [although similar to you, Serenity, they were only words, and I was never far from his heart], the minister asked, “and who gives this woman away,” my Dad, in his deep, wonderful voice, said, for all to hear… “My mother and I do.”

Ah, slips of the tongue are wonderful ice-breakers.

But after the I do’s, in the receiving line, well, I don’t know that anyone has seen a bride cry quite that much.  Oh, a smile was there, tremulous, wondering what the hell I had gotten myself into, wondering if I was in some kind of nightmare…and there he was, looking for all in the world as if he had truly swallowed a canary….

For better or worse…


serenity blaze
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305 posted 07-31-2004 08:41 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

sorry.

One memory just led to another there.

It's different now tho. I can't explain it, or even how it came to be different, but it's not that wailing helplessness I feel anymore. I'm looking forward again.

and I am smiling.

I feel like I just looked back upon an imposing mountain and I think, "Wow. I climbed that?"

Not bad, Karen, not bad. I might not have done it gracefully and without complaint, but here I am.



NOW PUT UP WITH ME!

serenity blaze
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306 posted 07-31-2004 08:49 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

grin?

"He got the virgin"

I happen to think that virgins are highly over-rated m'self.

and oh my Kari, now you've gone and done it!

lmao...my wedding day? I woke to find my Chou, my neighbor, in tears. Her mother died. I spent the morning on her couch with her head in my lap, crying with her and stroking her head. Then I went home and started drinking. By afternoon, I was locked in the bedroom with my half gallon of whiskey, still crying. HIS mother was banging on the door, pleading while he yelled it was all "off."

She settled him down, picked the lock on the door and convinced me to just go get it over with. Just as we were about to leave, the mailman came. He brought us the A.O.L. bill, and A.O.L. had charged me by the minute for part of that month, because "dummy hubby" had canceled my account and I said, "oh yeah?" and just continued to use it!

We were calling it off again on the way there...

shaking my head

it's funny now sure, but sheesh!

I just didn't wanna do it...

serenity blaze
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307 posted 07-31-2004 08:51 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

and I'm laughing.

How can our lives be so different and still so much the same???
Kit McCallum
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Ontario, Canada


308 posted 07-31-2004 08:53 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

I don’t know if you all realize this, but you’ve been keeping me smiling
since day one of Karen’s two journal threads.  

I’m one of those “silent ones” who has just been reading and
enjoying everyone’s thoughts, memories and stories along the way.  

So ... I just wanted to pop in to say hello, and thank all of you for being ...

Well ...  

Simply ... wonderful.  
serenity blaze
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309 posted 07-31-2004 08:57 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Kit? WHAT A WONDERFUL SURPRISE!

gleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

and um, tell us a story?

what about your wedding day?

(I can try, can't I?)

serenity blaze
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310 posted 07-31-2004 09:06 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Kit? I've been waiting a long time to debut the smilie you made for me--and ta-da!





(and I know, I don't play fair, huh?)

Hugs, lady K!


Sunshine
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311 posted 07-31-2004 09:09 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Isn't it nice when they sort of pop out of the woodwork that way?  I always do wonder who's reading whom...
serenity blaze
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312 posted 07-31-2004 09:13 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

It IS lovely! And now I think I'll try to get myself quiet and keep my fingers crossed.

I tend to go off like an untied balloon through the forum when I get excited and I don't want to frighten folks away...

maybe I should try some sleep?

(eeeeeeeegads I'm nuts)

stories...

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyummies!

Kit McCallum
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313 posted 07-31-2004 09:49 AM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

ROFL … my wedding day Karen?  LOL, OK, plug your nose as you read, and I’ll tell. You’ll understand why, in a minute.

Ummmm, OK, let’s see.  My parents lived in the country, quite a ways out of the city, so I had moved in with my soon-to-be husband’s household so I could be closer to school.  Boy, that was about 21 years ago now.  

I was going to college – he was an apprentice carpenter.  When I moved in, I was given a room at the far end of the hall opposite my husband’s.  His mom chaperoned us with such expertise, it was scary.  If she heard me sneak down the hallway for a goodnight kiss, she’d say “Keep that door open you too!” lol.  All was innocent under that roof. We’d planned a year long engagement, so I could be finished school and we could afford a little apartment.  We had a wedding date set, had the big church booked, the hall booked, the whole enchilada. We only had a year to wait.  

However … once I’d moved in, and found out his mom was clairvoyant, and the best darn chaperone this world has ever seen, lol, (bless her heart) we bumped the wedding up. I called up my mom and said, “What would dad think if we had the wedding in 3 months at our house?” Mom screeched!  He’d be ecstatic!  He’ll finally get some use out of that living room (it was one of those big old formal ones – the kind no one ever walked into, let alone sat in). Such a waste of space my dad would always say.

So ….. mom and I went into a flurry. I bought the 3rd wedding dress I tried on, we sent out invitations with lightening speed, ordered the bridesmaids dresses out of the Sears catalog, hired a small caterer, and found an apartment and signed a lease.  We were all set. No time to waste!  The fastest wedding preparations you’ve ever seen without a shotgun setting the timeframe, lol.

My wedding dress needed no alterations and hung in a plastic cover discreetly in my bedroom closet at my husband’s parents house since I was still living there.  

One morning, only a few short weeks before the big day, I woke up to a strange smell.  I sniffed the air and wondered what on earth my mother-in-law-to-be was cooking for breakfast!  It was a horrible greasy strong almost garlicky stench … ohhhhh, it was strong!!!

I got up and went downstairs, and we all gathered in the kitchen.  No … It wasn’t food.

It was skunks!  A whole FAMILY of skunks had moved in under our front porch and sprayed the heck out of their new-found den.  It lasted for days. It permeated the house. The furniture stunk, the curtains stunk, our clothes stunk, our hair stunk, even my husband’s and his dad’s lunchboxes stunk when they opened them up at their construction site for lunch.

Over the next few days, we had the skunks “re-located” but the smell insisted on staying behind. We rented an Ionizer of some sort.  Some mechanical box device that sent out positive ions to combat the negative ions and neutralize the horrible smell.  We had to turn it on and leave it going all day long and I’d come home from school and hold my breath, run in, turn it off and run back outside. Get a fresh breath, run in and open all the windows. Back and forth I’d go, then sit outside for a half an hour until it was safe to go back inside.

Well … it worked, I’m happy to say.  Things got back to normal, everything eventually smelled better and all was well.  

All was well that is ... until a few days before the wedding when I went into the closet to take out my wedding dress that had been smoldering there in the plastic in my closet.  Ohhhhhhh, the horror, rofl!  It stunk to high heaven!!!  The plastic had been like a breeding ground or something. It held in ALL the smell inside!  It was like something out of Amityville Horror.  I half expected a live skunk to come flying out at me as I finished unzipping the bag!  

Well, the rest was history.  We rented that machine again, laid out my wedding dress, and blasted it for two days solid, hoping the smell would come out of the lace and frills and fabrics.  Let’s just put it this way ...

To this day, when I hear “Here Comes The Bride” … all I can picture is a bunch of smiling family and friends eagerly watching a young bride come down the aisle in her father’s living room, and everyone grinning at me as they teased me by pinching their fingers over their noses, rofl!

It was a good day … honest. But no one ever let me forget it, lol.
Sunshine
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314 posted 07-31-2004 09:59 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Well, that story stunk to high heaven...LOL...oh Kit...I think you've topped us all...

more, please!
serenity blaze
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315 posted 07-31-2004 10:06 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

I knew I smelled a story there...

priceless, that is just priceless!

Thank you so much, Kit!

You just made my day.

What a sweetheart! and a great story too!

(so don't be a stranger now, k?)



c'mon everybody, we're taking music stories, wedding stories, music at wedding stories, hair stories, animal stories...



thanks all

Nightshade
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316 posted 07-31-2004 10:29 AM       View Profile for Nightshade   Email Nightshade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nightshade's Home Page   View IP for Nightshade

  ... and you just happened to make this Kit!!      LOL. These stories are all so wonderful. My hubby constantly asks me from the other room, "what are you laughing at?" or when he sees me dabbing my eyes with a kleenex as I sniffle my way to get another cup of tea, "another story make ya cry darlin'?"  I just wave a hand at him as if to answer, "don't ask."
   This has to be what my Mom meant by repeatedly telling us, "always remember to "share."     Hugs all round!
Enchantress
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Somewhere in time~


317 posted 07-31-2004 11:47 AM       View Profile for Enchantress   Email Enchantress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Enchantress

My gosh!!  I've been reading since I got up and laughing so hard!

These stories are wonderful!

Kit..great to see you here!!  And, I couldn't ever top that story!
Karen, Karilea, Jo,..all of you!...what a sharing group!

Gawd I love this place!

Have to run...in the meantime...hugs all around.  
iliana
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since 12-05-2003
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USA


318 posted 07-31-2004 12:37 PM       View Profile for iliana   Email iliana   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for iliana

Kit, that story takes the cake....(actually, wondering how your guests were able to take their cake??lol)!  Really, that is one I'd love to share with my mom.  I wish everone would put their stories in the prose section so we could e-card friends and family with them (of course, with your premission).  

Karen & Karilea -- Of course, "I'm okay."  Now that my issue is out for this month...I can spend a little more time around here.  Hubby and son are off to move my daughter's things out of her Manhattan apartment, leaving Sunday for almost a week.  The boys will get to stop by my Mom's farm in Ohio on the way up from Texas....wish I could go, but I've a business to run I cannot leave.  I'll probably be around a lot in the evenings.  No way that I'll feel lonesome with all you guys around.  

Karen - I had to get the tissue out this time with your story of your wedding.     My first marriage was at a courthouse...my husband's idea....our witnesses were pulled off the street and the woman still had curlers in her hair.  I should have know things would never work.  My father died about 12 years before my second marriage.  But you can bet your patutti that I had my church wedding this time; my big brother gave me away.  

Karilea -- That was a great story...there's a moral to it too, of course.  Parents and friends are usually right!  But then, again, the things we learn when we don't listen to them....sigh.  I am almost convinced your first husband and mine were "related!"  

Chris, hi ya!  

Mornin' everybody else!  Have a great day!  
iliana
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319 posted 07-31-2004 12:38 PM       View Profile for iliana   Email iliana   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for iliana

Hi ya, Nancy Lee!  Let's hear yours???!  
Mysteria
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320 posted 07-31-2004 02:18 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

Laughing at Kit, if the dress didn't fit - hey, just roll it up right?     You are priceless m'friend, priceless.

My wedding stories are too long to maintian the sequences of events, so you tell me if these were good omens:

Wedding #1 - Was a publicity stunt and annulled after less than 17 hours, a long story and I have to be very careful due to legal issues related to that one    

Wedding #2 - His grandmother cancelled the catering. (That old lady was wiser than I gave her credit for, and I should have listened, but then I wouldn't have Todd.)  Omen #1 - divorced within 1 year 5 months)

Wedding #2 - The minister whose name was actually Reverend Valentine backed up into the oscillating fan.  It ripped off his robe exposing a bare man only in underwear, socks with garters, and shoes.  He had to take a time out to compose himself?  I should have run for the hills.  (That was Omen #2 - divorced as quickly as I could safely do so.)

Wedding #3 - Omen #3 - The power went out ~ there was no light at the church, no power to cook all the food being prepared at my future sister-in-law's.  My husband-to-be left the church to go to a store and purchase candles for everyone, talk about desperate. I was left there in that chapel with everyone sitting in the dark as he and his cousin went to fetch candles.  1/2 an hour or so passes and they are not back, and my temper tells me to bolt.  In he walks with that charming smile and a box of those white emergency candles, so a service got performed.  Now the food - salads no meats!  So we ordered pizza!  That marriage lasted about 5 years.

I have given up and refuse to try marriage ever again, but when I hear Kit's story about a skunk, should there be a next time, I will have one in reserve       Obviously there was more to dissolving these marriages, than caterers, and incidents, but I have learned one thing now, that anyone will tell you who they are, you just have to listen.
iliana
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321 posted 07-31-2004 02:25 PM       View Profile for iliana   Email iliana   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for iliana

Sharon -- Hi ya!  OMG...omens....yes, I think there are some.  You are so funny!  But, now you have my curiousity peaked about that first one.  *hugs*....jo
Aenimal
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322 posted 07-31-2004 02:59 PM       View Profile for Aenimal   Email Aenimal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Aenimal

LMAO here, you all sooo crazeh. I'm laughing through gritted teeth though, the source of pain I shall now share for your personal amusement.

There are certain days it's better to stay in bed and obviously today was one of those. I awoke about a half hour ago, yes I realize it's 3pm but I didn't sleep well least night (a Double Big Mac combo returned to haunt me).

Dying of thirst I came downstairs for water but as it was warm so I went for some ice. Stupidly, I rested a full cup of water on the edge of the freezer as I groggily(is that a word?) fumbled for some ice. The cup falls(good thing it was plastic), I slip on the water and into a lovely triplelutz/pirouette before landing square on my knee. In agony I rolled around right into the puddle and when I finally pulled myself up I wiped cut myself on the door frame.

Ahem.....yeah. So I'm groggy,wet and pissy, that is until I read some of your mishaps.
iliana
Member Patricius
since 12-05-2003
Posts 13488
USA


323 posted 07-31-2004 03:02 PM       View Profile for iliana   Email iliana   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for iliana

Oh, Aenimal, you need one of these
Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 12-21-1999
Posts 5742
Southern Abstentia


324 posted 07-31-2004 03:48 PM       View Profile for Local Rebel   Email Local Rebel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Local Rebel

Most of my road stories aren't as entertaining as Bob Hope and Bing Crosby Karen, or, the ones that are probably wouldn't be suitable for this forum, but, maybe this one will pass journal muster.

I was riding up and down the main drag of a town in Georgia looking for a venue.  All I had was an address scribbled on a gas receipt and I couldn't find the street that I'd written down.  The rest of the band and the roadies had taken the bus but I wasn't able to join them, so I'd flown into a nearby city and had rented a Mercury Cougar that I'd driven to location.  I'd already been through town a couple of times when a local yokel fell in behind me and started following.  

On my third pass through town I finally saw the street on my right just as I had already gone by it.  I turned around in the parking lot of a greasy spoon and sure enough -- Barney Fife stayed right on top of me.  As soon as I entered the destination street he blue-lighted me and I pulled the car over and rolled down the window.

Two more police cars converged upon the scene and I could see the head deputy approaching the rear of my vehicle with his pistol drawn.  He ordered me to step out of the car. I complied.  As he kept the pistol trained carefully on me another officer turned me around against the car forcibly and began patting me down.  The head monkey in charge asked me if I'd ever had the license plate registered to a Mercedes-Benz.  I told him it was a rental car and I'd never had the license plate registered at all.  Wrong answer.

I was tossed in the back of a squad car and driven to the municipal building downtown.  When I exited the car the town sheriff was waiting for us all outside.  He quickly approached and began taking the cuffs off me as he apologized,

"I'm real sorry about the mix-up Mr. Jones but I have a new dispatcher and she didn't know that the abbreviation MERC stood for Mercury and not Mercedes!"

As I was leaving to get my car that they towed to the station I thought I heard him tell the deputy to put the bullet back in his pocket.
 
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