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serenity's interactive journal

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Nightshade
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925 posted 06-20-2004 10:18 AM       View Profile for Nightshade   Email Nightshade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nightshade's Home Page   View IP for Nightshade

  Karen....you are a joy!!!!

Mysteria
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British Columbia, Canada


926 posted 06-20-2004 08:23 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

Hmmm!

I got a card from a mouse named Elsie,
And here is what she said,
“I heard from my cousin Ernie,
Karenity thought our Jesus dead?"

"Actually here’s what really happened
To Jesus on that fateful day,
He up and left Karen’s stove,
It was a Sunday night, they say."

"With a giggle he coerced her dog
To give him and his buds a ride.
They set out on a big adventure,
Sitting upon his flea-infested hide."

"Well you know our pal Jesus?
After "her" house, he got really bored,
Some say he then hopped a butterfly,
Went to search for himself and the Lord!"

That wild Jesus has settled down,
Lives in a country clock today.

He’s got a wife, 3 kids, dog, and a cat,
Another little mousekin on the way."

"Every once in a while he reminisces,
'Bout his great old days in N’Arlins,
He pulls out a tiny little plastic bag,
Laughs, then simply starts to grin."

"He starts swinging from the flowers,
Shouting, "Serenity, I'm free!"
Singing at the top of his lungs,
Let it be, Let it be, Let it be!"


"Start where you want to finish!"
Feel free to quote me, I may become famous.
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
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Hurricane Alley


927 posted 06-20-2004 09:45 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Awwwwww how cute is that???? Good job Sharon!!! I'm loving it.

Compassion is the heart and integrity is the soul of excellence.

Enchantress
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since 08-14-2001
Posts 37801
Somewhere in time~


928 posted 06-20-2004 10:08 PM       View Profile for Enchantress   Email Enchantress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Enchantress

Awwww...this is adorable Sharon!
I'm so pleased to see that Jesus lives!
You are very creative and I'm sure Ser will be glad to hear this story!!
Seymour Tabin
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since 07-07-99
Posts 32119
Tamarac Fla


929 posted 06-20-2004 10:20 PM       View Profile for Seymour Tabin   Email Seymour Tabin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Seymour Tabin

Sharon,
You are a delight.
Nightshade
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930 posted 06-20-2004 10:37 PM       View Profile for Nightshade   Email Nightshade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nightshade's Home Page   View IP for Nightshade

Awwwwwww .... I am so happy to hear that Jesus is doing just fine. I can go to bed with my mind at ease now. Thanks Sharon!!
Aenimal
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since 11-18-2002
Posts 7451
the ass-end of space


931 posted 06-20-2004 10:49 PM       View Profile for Aenimal   Email Aenimal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Aenimal

Even Jesus needs a high, sorry 'ascencion'. grins thanks for sending me this, after a day with dear old dad need the laughs
Larry C
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932 posted 06-20-2004 11:31 PM       View Profile for Larry C   Email Larry C   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Larry C's Home Page   View IP for Larry C

Yup! And lots of 'em.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

Mysteria
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933 posted 06-21-2004 01:37 AM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

You know Larry I was thinking about you today, off and on.  I try to not think about Fathers on Fathers Day, except for my great son, but I did think of you.  I was hoping you were getting lots of much needed and deserved hugs.  
serenity blaze
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since 02-02-2000
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934 posted 06-21-2004 01:44 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Smiling so wide here...

Mysteria? Thank YOU for returning the smile--I think I lost mine in the grout today and needed it badly.

and giggles to Raph too, "ascended" was indeed my standard response, too.

*shaking my head again*

Who needs fiction with a life like this?



Hugs all.

I love you all.



HopeS
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since 12-22-2000
Posts 4613
Perth Western Australia


935 posted 06-21-2004 03:17 AM       View Profile for HopeS   Email HopeS   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit HopeS's Home Page   View IP for HopeS

Sharon this was delightful and ohhhh so cute
Hope
Toerag
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since 07-29-99
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Ala bam a


936 posted 06-21-2004 07:22 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

Very cute write....loved it...even toerags need some chuckles now and then....thanks
nakdthoughts
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since 10-29-2000
Posts 19275
Between the Lines


937 posted 06-21-2004 06:56 PM       View Profile for nakdthoughts   Email nakdthoughts   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nakdthoughts

Day 1..... With Dignity

Right on the tip of my tongue
those thoughts
that hold my heart in hurt, my eyes
seeing the pain, struck
by the lack of breath,
filling up with sadness tears...

It's how it is, her hands
"doing" what isn't there to do,
"feeling" what isn't there to feel,
as I try not to do and
feel for her, dignity still
suspending the need that regresses one
from adult to childhood.

She lacks control.
I lack power.
Both, parallel journeys.
Each having their own pain.

~~~~
Larry C
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938 posted 06-21-2004 09:12 PM       View Profile for Larry C   Email Larry C   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Larry C's Home Page   View IP for Larry C

Sharon,
I had a wonderful Father's Day. Though my son and I managed a lengthy and unsuccessful phone tag game. I don't think you know of a boy we had in the '90's. He turned sixteen the week he moved in and left shortly after his eighteenth birthday. His dad committed suicide when Andy was only five. He was pretty much on a throw away path. It truly is a long story and quite eventful even after he moved in with us.

Anyway he is married and this was his first Father's Day as a daddy. He called me and was thrilled to be the first son to wish me a Happy Father's Day! He's pretty special and quite a surprise.

I spent the evening writing the Prologue and Epilogue for my project Assignment's From My Daughter. Though I find much satisfaction in the project it did drain me. You know I'm not real long winded on paper(well usually). Regardless I burned up 5,000 words last night in no time. I should send it to you to critique. Bear minimum I hope to desktop publish it as a book. Just dreaming. And thank you sweet friend for remembering me. Nancy and I were speaking of you on Father's Day. Makes me smile...and tear up too, guess I better go.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


939 posted 06-22-2004 02:42 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Maureen, that is truly the most poignant thing I've ever read from you--completely without pretense and heart wide open.

The frustration of helplessness, the fury of lack of control...m'lady, you are handling this with such grace and dignity and STRENGTH.

smile.

I know that sounds funny considering how weary you must feel. People call me strong all the time and I laugh. I cry like a baby--sometimes several times a day.

So I'd like to request permission to ask for a tiarra for you.

A mere token perhaps, but I'd like to convey my respect for you.

And besides? When you get a tiara pic? You also get all the chablis you can drink.

Love you lady, and remember always, that I'm here for you to rant and rage or just a cup of coffee (caffeine free? my nerves are fried)

*  *  *

Now you, my sweet buddy Larry, I didn't forget you either.

The holidays are always so rough.

Please know my heart is with you.



*  *  *

Yesterday was the first holiday that passed that I didn't remember my Dad with a memorial post. It was also the first time that I didn't climb into a bottle of whiskey and scream my outrage at the injustice of it all.

I'm not saying I didn't cry--I cried plenty.

But I kept on working.

Some who stopped to see me yesterday  my mistook my tears for exhausttion and resentment of taking on a difficult task.

Some was that, perhaps, but alot of it was just the loss I felt--he would be here cheering me on--and then I felt a sense of, well, serenity, as I imsgined that somehow, somewhere, in some form I can't fathom, that my father was there, quiet but smiling proud.

And that was his way, as he didn't say much. But every now and then when he was really proud of me, he would squeeze my shoulder.

Yanno?

It may sound hokey, but I feel a little tender there today.



I love you Dad, and carry your blood and your pride inside of me, and loving you the way that I do, I feel more responsible about taking care of me as I understand profoundly now that I carry YOU beneath my skin.

Continuity.

(So you can stop telling me to "slow down"-grin--you'd be working twice as hard as I, and you know it.)

Thanks forum...and thanks Dad, for being there for me yesterday.

I felt you.

GG
Member Elite
since 12-03-2002
Posts 3615
Lost in thought


940 posted 06-22-2004 04:25 AM       View Profile for GG   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GG

Hey people.
yes, yes, I know, I don't know you all. Er, okay, I don't know most of you.
But? deal with it!
Been reading, but don't have the time I want to post the replies I want in all the forums lately... And since I know most I have directed this at read here, I thought I'd post.
So,
Maureen?
Larry?
All of you going through these hard times right now (many, many more then I could list. But if you're in a struggle then know I'm talking to you)...
I just want to let you know you're in my thoughts,
and...

Hang in there.

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
                  Joyce kilmer

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 10-29-2000
Posts 19275
Between the Lines


941 posted 06-22-2004 05:52 AM       View Profile for nakdthoughts   Email nakdthoughts   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nakdthoughts

Thank you Karen, for being you~~~
Make sure that tiara is tilted a bit..until I get my life squared away



Alyssa, I know you struggle, too and I thank you for your caring words, always.

Maureen
Nightshade
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942 posted 06-22-2004 11:29 AM       View Profile for Nightshade   Email Nightshade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nightshade's Home Page   View IP for Nightshade

Okay....okay....did I mention sawdust awhile ago in a post I did about renovations? Well.....IT'S BAAAAAAAAACK!! My hubby and I decided that this week being his holidays, and the weather naturally being yucky (ever seen a Harley rider on vacation with the rain pouring down outside on top of his newly washed and polished bike?).....we thought..."let's take apart the kitchen and paint the cupboards and drawers white!" Seemed like a good idea at the time.
  Enter hubby, upset about the weather and brandishing an electric sander. No....no...please...please do the sanding outsi....RRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!! Shades of Leatherface!!!   Better to just let him be. Most of the boxed items can be dusted off anyway. As for the donuts I bought for a happy painting day snack....well, the sawdust does look abit like cinnamon sugar.
  So, here we are in day two of what has become a marathon remodelling holiday. The sun has decided to peek out briefly and hubby's friends kindly have sped by one too many times on their hogs, slowing down by our driveway littered with paint cans, rollers, brushes, drop sheets(could have used them in the house..duh), and an assortment of sanders in different sizes. Oh....I failed to mention my sudden dislike for extension cords. Snakes...winding their way through my house, tripping me up and tempting my pup to bite through and nearly electrify herself. Ah yes....remodelling....he has just informed me "If you don't like them when we are finished darlin'.....we will just rip them out and get new ones professionally installed."    WHAT?!!!   Excuse me while I go outside and scream for a few moments.
Larry C
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943 posted 06-22-2004 09:16 PM       View Profile for Larry C   Email Larry C   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Larry C's Home Page   View IP for Larry C

I'm not sure I can keep track.

Alyssa, you are a dear. I think I'd make a pretty good surrogate dad. Wanna be a daddy's girl?


Karen,
I love your musings about your dad and your connection to him. Thanks for that. You made this lonely dad feel pretty good. Again I stand in awe, shaking my head, enjoying every second I get to be with you...


M,
I'm quite sure you know how much I love your tenderness and insight. But I'll tell you again you touch me with your writing.


Chris,
I'm about to buy a brand new home and you're scaring the crap out of me. But since my commute is going from 2 miles to 35 miles I'm buying a cruiser bike to make up for it. So the house feels like a secondary thing to me.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


944 posted 06-23-2004 04:24 AM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Chris?

Smiling at your sawdust here.

I say, if you've got sawdust, then it doesn't take much more to have a frigging circus!



sigh.

We're sanding SHEETROCK now.

um.

THEY are sanding sheetrock. (and actually, I don't mind when they do--grin--gives me an excuse to quit working the GROUT!!!)

Hugs to all.

I go put in another day tomorrow.

Hmmm. Maybe someday I will be able to REALLY make a muscle.

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis
since 11-18-2002
Posts 7451
the ass-end of space


945 posted 06-23-2004 01:47 PM       View Profile for Aenimal   Email Aenimal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Aenimal

quote:
Some was that, perhaps, but alot of it was just the loss I felt--he would be here cheering me on--and then I felt a sense of, well, serenity, as I imsgined that somehow, somewhere, in some form I can't fathom, that my father was there, quiet but smiling proud.

And that was his way, as he didn't say much. But every now and then when he was really proud of me, he would squeeze my shoulder.

Yanno?

It may sound hokey, but I feel a little tender there today.
I love you Dad, and carry your blood and your pride inside of me, and loving you the way that I do, I feel more responsible about taking care of me as I understand profoundly now that I carry YOU beneath my skin.


Damn it, that made me tear up but then i'm an emotional mess lately. Father's day, or any day I visit my dad is always difficult. Deep wounds, but he's been much better with me the last couple of years. I think I've just settled into a comfortable pattern of denial because I know nothing will ever get resolved. He still has his moments but I can take brush them off better. My brothers and i were laughing the other day, thinking about the commercial's on TV where father hands down some poignant advice to his children. See when we were kids my dad's advice was "Son, maybe one hour of a day is happiness, the other 23 are misery." 'Splains alot about me don't it. Why am i writing this here? Not sure really, just rolled out. shrugs
serenity blaze
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since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


946 posted 06-23-2004 01:59 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Even before my Dad died, I had to paint him up "perfect" in my mind. I didn't like to talk to my brothers and sisters who had different memories of him, and after he died I considered it a blasphemy to even discuss some of the errors of his ways.

He'll have been gone three years this July, and it took some time, and a lot of whiskey, but I think now I can see him as the person he was and there has been some kind of marriage in my head between that adoring little girl and the adult Karen who also knows quite matter of factly that this man who worshipped my mother was the same handsome Navy guy who had a way with the ladies and...well, yes, sometimes drank too much and broke my mother's heart.

But it occurred to me one day that he didn't have to be perfect for me to love him.

And that was a relief for me, because y'see?

That means I don't have to be perfect to be deserving of love either.



Now let me wipe those tears, Raph. They'll detract from the little sparklies in your tiara.

SOMEBODY GET THIS MAN A TIARA DAMMIT!

Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


947 posted 06-23-2004 05:47 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine



I'm sorry but does it LOOK like Raph needs a tiara? I think not!

    
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 10-29-2000
Posts 19275
Between the Lines


948 posted 06-23-2004 09:06 PM       View Profile for nakdthoughts   Email nakdthoughts   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for nakdthoughts

Day 2...Tears Apart

Each day awakens the tired in me,
not dreading but anticipating
what is to be expected.
I caught
a tear in the corner of his eye,
while whispering of the previous night's events
and how nothing has changed, yet
all is different.

Wondering when next the decline
will pause us into another silence
trying to do, think for each,
what is best for all.

Should I, should he, should we
do nothing
letting nothing happen
until...
...
It's alright to say "I hate you"
(with love) each time a move
of her body brings a grimace
of pain.

But that first time...yesterday,
they were my eyes
that filled with tears.

6/22 a.m.

~~**~~

She let me ...so I did
softly stroking her cool foreheard
brushing back her hair,
wanting her to feel I was there
wanting her to "know".

Eyes half open, even in sleep
the only peace is knowing she
is in less pain...during.

I asked her when sitting up a bit, "what are you thinking?"
She replied, "pertaining to what?"

At tmes her mind rewinds
to phrases that show her sense of humor.

If only she knew that I
understand, even if...
she says nothing at all.

M
6/22 p.m.


[This message has been edited by nakdthoughts (06-23-2004 10:03 PM).]

time prophet
Member
since 07-30-2003
Posts 361
Amongst the Ancient Trees


949 posted 06-23-2004 10:05 PM       View Profile for time prophet   Email time prophet   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for time prophet

"M" may the sunshine in the mail warm the soul. A hand reaches across the water to you. Peace be with you dear lady.
 
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