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"Straight" Talk...from serenity
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"Straight" Talk...from serenity |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
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I'd like to say first that no one asked me to do this. I wanted to say this, because Ron and mods have been incredibly patient with my insanity. But in a recent thread (garysgirl) there was quite a party atmosphere painted regarding a certain type of lifestyle. And I just read over it again, and wanted to tell you all that most of it is indeed true, in fact I left out alot. After spending the weekend looking through photo albums, and scrap books, I thought I'd share with you some of the missing information. I did indeed work with a band. The drummer is still in jail. (simple robbery--the man has a serious cocaine problem--and I say HAS because I know once an addiction is apparent, it's with you for life) The lead guitar player? He's fine. I talked to him last night. He had an edge tho, he replaced the former lead guitar player who committed suicide. The bass player? I'm still in touch with him as well. He finally got custody of his kids. His wife overdosed on oxycontin last year. She was 36 and left behind two children. The road manager is now living in an assisted care facility, seems he "snapped". The sound man disappeared in Cali about 3 years ago. Haven't heard from him since. But he's the one who sold me the lovely piano. (Thanks, Bruce, wherever you are.) And me? I sit HERE, turning down jobs tending bar, because? I AIN'T going back that way. I just wanted to say, be careful of your choices. I felt it important to show you the flip side of that party coin, because leaving it as it is, tends to be a glorification of a dangerous, unhealthy lifestyle. Realize that if you go walking the edge there's a very good chance you will end up clinging to it. And that's only for the lucky ones. So...peace, good poet people. Have fun, but don't be stupid. Now...serenity is serving up some coffee this morning. And? I've got a book to write, if I can ever remember all of it.  |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
--and I say HAS because I know once an addiction is apparent, it's with you for life) ================================= I just wanted to say, be careful of your choices. ================================= Realize that if you go walking the edge there's a very good chance you will end up clinging to it. ================================== As I read this, what comes to mind is... this could be about any thing...any personal burden or baggage that one might carry... it could apply to any self destructive pattern that we might use to escape from the pain or to use as denial... there are many "addictions and edges"...and not all of them have to do with drugs or alcohol... unfortunately...we mortals find many ways to try and obtain "comfortably numb" and even more reasons why so many are hurting in the first place. anyone ever tell ya yer beautiful when youre brave   |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
now don't go painting me a hero, Jan... geez. It just occurred to me that my little stories sounded very much like a salespitch for Hell. I couldn't and would not do that to my friends. Half the truth is still a lie. Not proud of it, and not ashamed of it. It just is what it is. smile, but I'm smart enough to know I just got lucky on the way. Hugs you. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
wasnt painting you a hero... But I think anyone who can speak up honestly about a deeply personal issue, and share their mistakes so that others might not make the same ones, should be given some Kudos. Its never easy to talk about these things... regardless of the addiction....ever see how fast a thread about computer addiction will disappear? Self honesty is often difficult to achieve. anyway...my mothy job is to paint you a poet  |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I knew you'd get upset about the "paint" bit! geez...shaking my head. I love you, yanno that? |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
"It just is what it is" Serenity, every day I thank those in charge that you came through... hugs.... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
good thing....cuz ya are stuck with me *L*love ya back me twin |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Didn't seem like a salespitch to Hell to me. Seemed like someone who's had some fun and some falls and, gained much wisdom. Doesn't it go "Judge not lest ye be judged?" I like you just fine.  Mikey |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
awwww....*sniff* GROUP HUG!!! and I didn't intend to be overly dramatic. *chuckle* Just a little disclaimer. Just because I've lived this life doesn't mean that I recommend it.  |
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Salty Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669Texas |
Serenty I have myself walked on the edge.Not really my choice but sometimes things can just happen. I was in a very bad marriage...and then a very bad car wreck. I was given oxycontin and many other things for all my pain. Just this last July I went to a place and had it all detoxed from my body. I am now clean and my pain is controlled with iboprohen. I feel like I was granted a miracle. The doctors I had were dangerous and just wanted to keep giving me more and more medication. I think I would not be here today if I had not asked for help. I do not crave the medicine what so ever now, and can smile again. I still like to party because I suppose I am a creature of the night *S*, but I never have drank much..of course most people think I have been haha...and I sure love to dance. You can have fun with the right people doing crazy things in a healthy way. Sure glad you saw the road was a little too rough before you started running down it. |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Besides, Sen, you have way better stories than me -- and that's what makes good writing. I live quietly, and think dangerously. I loved a bit of razza mataza bashabakaza, by the way. That pic is confidence and sexiness personified.Anyway, enough out of my word hole.  |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Hmmm.... Unshackled I learned to walk but always remembered the beauty of forged links shining in the sun reflections catch more than eyes |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Hey Karen.... I knew that you were just playing and kidding all along in the other thread (garysgirl), and I would hope that Ron and all the moderators would know that we ALL were just joking and passing some time away. I would like to say, though, that if any of us were offensive to anyone, the moderators are welcome to take that thread off. Maybe it was getting a little out of hand. As I told you when the "drinking alcohol" part of the thread started, I don't drink anymore......but, I know many good, kindhearted, compassionate, loving people who do drink some form of alchohol still. As far as the band thing goes, I have no idea what that kind of life style is. I do know, though, that there are good, kindhearted, compassionate, loving people in all walks of life. True, some may turn to different forms of addiction, but as someone said earlier in this thread, how many people would respond to a "computer addiction" thread? I guess what I'm trying to say is that NO-ONE has a right to judge another human being. If the person judging isn't guilty of whatever they are putting judgement on, at least one of their family, friends, or acquaintances IS guilty of whatever they are judging. I, personally, have been judged entirely too much for one life time, and I've found that it's absolutely IMPOSSIBLE to please everyone. Anyway, as I said before, if the other thread is offensive to anyone at all, I will not mind AT All, if Ron or one of the moderators takes it off. When I started it, I never imagined that it would have so many different responses. Well, I certainly didn't mean to say all that, but I said it anyway, didn't I? By the way, I love every one of you who responded to my thread and I thank you all for your love and support..... Bye, I guess......  ~Ethel/garysgirl~ |
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Kielo Senior Member
since 2002-02-11
Posts 1109 |
*grin* Clinging is no fun. Ug... Yes. I don't miss it, but I miss HER... Oi... I'm a fool. Kielo *sigh* Forgive my incoherence. I'm still........ yah. I know only one thing, and that thing is that I know nothing. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Thanks all... I just felt a twinge of remorse for glamourizing something that should not. No one complained to ME--except me. Hugs to all. and Capt. Ron? I think you could write my story better than I... and we do all have tales to tell. Speaking of which? I should get back to it! LATER!  to all! |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Ser... no one tells the story like you. I couldn't come close. I lack the talent and insight you have. |
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Miah Senior Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 1062Pennsylvania |
I've read your posts and your poetry and all I have to say is.. You are a beautiful human being. nuff said. [This message has been edited by Miah (12-10-2002 03:09 PM).] |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Yes, serenity...you are beautiful!! |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Beautiful AND gorgeous |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
 *hand-over-heart* thank you |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Serenity~ Hurting someone with anything I said was the last thing on my mind on the previous mentioned thread. If I have offended anyone I apologize to them here and now. I have some demons of my own that I have kept under control for almost 15 years, but there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about having a drink of alcohol. I know that I don't need it anymore, but I fight this battle everyday. Again I am truly sorry for any pain that I may have caused you or anyone else...Paul Wilson I applaud you for being strong and not falling back into the trap that has no heart or soul. [This message has been edited by Paul Wilson (12-11-2002 02:29 AM).] |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
whoa!!! everybody? CHILL. I just felt a personal twinge...that's all. I'll be damned. grin. I think I just became a "party pooper". ROFLMAO. sigh. I love you people. (and don't tell anybody? but I DO worry...) |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
if anything, i think the thread started out "questionable", but quickly turned more acceptable. (uh, i didn't have any problems joining in once it became an all-girl band!). i think what it started to show was that you can have plenty of fun... and still remember it the next day. hell, most of my stories? they come from the nights i wasn't drinking. (ask me about the Black Crowes, forty some-odd people, and 'break-dancing' with my pants tied around my head someday...) |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Chris? yuk yuk yuk maybe you should ask ME? about? "'break-dancing' with my pants tied around my head someday...)" or... maybe I'll just dedicate the book to you? yes? |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Well........... Paul, Christopher, Serenity, Salty (and anyone else who joined in on...or read...the thread that I started before), I thought that we were all having just a good ole jolly time. Believe it or not, I drink only Diet Vanilla Coke, NOW, and I think we were having as much fun as any of the other "party goers" who happened to come back here to the "PIP Lounge"......... and in a cleaner way, too. After all, people, have you read some of the other threads??? (many innuendos) Anyway, I personally, enjoyed the talk back and forth that we ADULTS were having. Besides, talking about the days gone past has good therapy sometimes, don't you think????? Anyway, I, personally, don't think any of us were hurting anybody, just as I don't think that some of the folks on Open Forum are hurting anyone with the harmless poems going back and forth. Well, enough said again, before I'm banned from the lounge, Open Forum, or anywhere else in this wonderful site. Oh, I just hope they don't kick me out of this family, too..... (like so many folks are kicked out of their group of family and friends when they say, do, or even FEEL ways that the group, as a whole, doesn't feel!!) ~Ethel~  |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
naw, no blushin' here. it was a blast... dedicate away midi-K Ethel - no worries, really. there are none, not here, not now. |
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Salty Senior Member
since 2002-11-23
Posts 669Texas |
No ones going to kick you out gg....you da star!!! NOw I think I'll go do some more partying. Turn that music back on. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
*blech* somebody just gave me an egg nog daiquiri... egads... this is bad *shudder*  |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
 Whoo Hooo! Now that I would have liked to have seen Chris. Hope you wore a helmet? Actually, on second thought I think I just answered that question myself. Serenity, you know I know and you stand as an example it can be beaten girl (((hugs))) |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Serenity, an egg-nog daiquiri??? I used to drink Lime Daiquiri's and "Pink Lady's", but never an egg-nog one!! HeeHee..... (note that I said USED TO ) BTW, ya'll, I'm not worried any more... I get over stuff real fast, can't you tell??? I like to have fun too much to pout for VERY long.......   Ethel [This message has been edited by garysgirl (12-11-2002 09:37 PM).] |
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