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Denise
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Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


0 posted 03-11-2002 09:13 AM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

I got this in my email! Enjoy!

Things Only a Kid Would Say

A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he'd found a cat. She asked him if it was dead or alive.

"Dead." She was informed.

"How do you know?" she asked her pupil.

"Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently.

"You did WHAT?!?" the teacher exclaimed in surprise.

"You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move."
--------------------
A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later....

"Da-ad...."

"What?"

"I'm thirsty. Can you bring drink of water?"

"No. You had your chance. Lights out."

Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad....."

"WHAT?"

"I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??"

"I told you NO!" If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!"

Five minutes later......"D! ! aaaa-aaaad....."

"WHAT!"

"When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?"
____________________________________________________
An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally
asked him, "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"

The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay
out!'"
____________________________________________________
One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her
son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"

The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said.
"I have to sleep in Daddy's room."

A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The big sissy."
_____________________________________________________
When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came
into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower.

She said,"Mommy, you are getting fat!" I replied, "Yes, honey,
remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy."

"I know," she replied, but what's growing in your butt?"
____________________________________________________

[This message has been edited by Denise (03-11-2002 09:16 AM).]

rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 05-31-2000
Posts 3404
PA


1 posted 03-11-2002 09:34 AM       View Profile for rosepetals25   Email rosepetals25   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for rosepetals25

LOL!  These are to cute *chuckles*  

Tara
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


2 posted 03-11-2002 10:34 AM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


I got them too, and chuckled all the way through...
Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 12-27-2000
Posts 5766
Riding


3 posted 03-11-2002 06:12 PM       View Profile for Skyfire   Email Skyfire   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Skyfire

Too good, too good!

I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather, not screaming, terrified, like his passengers.

Brad
Member Ascendant
since 08-20-99
Posts 5896
Jejudo, South Korea


4 posted 03-11-2002 06:58 PM       View Profile for Brad   Email Brad   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Brad

I'm a sissy, I'm a sissy.

Marshalzu
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Member Elite
since 02-15-2001
Posts 4465
Lurking


5 posted 03-12-2002 09:40 AM       View Profile for Marshalzu   Email Marshalzu   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marshalzu's Home Page   View IP for Marshalzu

They are wonderful

"The pin didn't drop it came and crashed down"

Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 03-07-2001
Posts 19652
British Columbia, Canada


6 posted 03-12-2002 11:00 PM       View Profile for Mysteria   Email Mysteria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mysteria

Now those were too cute, and if I may I would like to share a cute story about my Granddaughter with you.  My granddaughter must have overheard the tail end of a conversation I was having with my son that they had bunny and hamster babies at their local pet store and I wondered what he thought about me getting her one for Easter. Later that evening when I was reading her a story, out of no where my granddaughter Tori said to me, "Gramma, when I grow up I am going to have a baby." To which I said,"that's wonderful Tori you'd be a very good Mommy".  She proceeded to say "Will you come with me to the pet store to pick it out?"  I said, "Honey you know your Mommy had Tasha, and babies come from their Mommy's tummy."  She said, "I know Gramma, but I heard youe say they had babies at the pet store, and I don't want anything growing inside OF MY TUMMY!"

Kids!

The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives.
  ~* Albert Einstein *~

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


7 posted 03-12-2002 11:19 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

That's a keeper Mysteria! I'm sure she'll be re-telling that story to her grandkids one day! Too precious!

I'm glad you enjoyed, everyone!

Brad, I knew it!
 
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