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 If u ever heard/told blonde joke, OPEN!!
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Passions in Poetry

If u ever heard/told blonde joke, OPEN!!!

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Alyssa
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0 posted 06-10-2001 10:20 PM       View Profile for Alyssa   Email Alyssa   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alyssa

Why do people pick on us blondes???
(i dont really mind) i dye my hair brown anyhow.....
anyway

Lets make a post full of blonde jokes,storys, moments, ect, ect ect!!!!! please label them when u write em though...
then i can print them out and put them in my scrap book.

here is a JOKE

What does a blonde do if she's not in bed by 10???

She goes home!!! (**hardy har har**)  

POST EM BABY!!

"lifes tough, get a helmet"

Dopey Dope
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1 posted 06-11-2001 02:21 AM       View Profile for Dopey Dope   Email Dopey Dope   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dopey Dope

.........no blonde jokes here.
I am deprived..
catalinamoon
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The Shores of Alone


2 posted 06-11-2001 08:05 AM       View Profile for catalinamoon   Email catalinamoon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit catalinamoon's Home Page   View IP for catalinamoon

OK, disclaimer..I was dating a very bad boy in 1991 and he loved to tell these jokes. It irritated me generally. BUT one that stuck with me through the years was just too  funny.
"Why did the blond have a bruise around her belly button?"
"Because her boyfriend was a blond too!"
Sven
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Lansing, MI USA


3 posted 06-11-2001 08:40 AM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

Although some of my best friends are blondes  , I hope that they'll forgive me for this. . .  

HOW BLONDE WAS SHE?

She thought a quarterback was a refund.

She tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

She thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.

She thought General Motors was in the army.

She thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.

Under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics."

She tripped over a cordless phone.

She spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice can because it said concentrate.

She got stabbed at a shoot-out.

She told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK"

They had to burn the school down to get her out of third grade.

At the bottom of the application where it says, "sign here," she put Sagittarius.

She asked for a price-check at the Dollar Store.

It takes her two hours to watch "60 Minutes"

She studied for a blood test - and failed.

She thought she needed a token to get on "Soul Train"

She sold the car for gas money.

When she saw the "NC-17 under 17 not admitted", she went home and got 16 friends.

When she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

She thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.

When she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

When she went to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport Left," she turned around and went home.

She got locked in a grocery store and starved to death, we'll miss her.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Acies
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Twilight Zone


4 posted 06-11-2001 09:17 AM       View Profile for Acies   Email Acies   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Acies

LMAO@Sven

that's not nice  

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Maree, Mic

Alyssa
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5 posted 06-11-2001 03:43 PM       View Profile for Alyssa   Email Alyssa   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alyssa

im gonna die!
lol
lol
lol!!!!!

"lifes tough, get a helmet"

SEA
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with you


6 posted 06-11-2001 03:56 PM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

How do you drown a Blonde?
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Superglue a penny
to the bottom of a pool

~SEA
serenity blaze
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since 02-02-2000
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7 posted 06-11-2001 05:18 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

Okay...not usually one for jokes of ANY prejudicial type---BUT-I did spy a bumper sticker once I liked:

"I am blonde and I'm not dumb!"

The sticker was upside down.
SEA
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8 posted 06-11-2001 05:27 PM       View Profile for SEA   Email SEA   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SEA

Serenity, I know what you mean....( that's funny BTW) but I have two step daughter's that are blonde...and they are so funny.....they prove some of the blonde jokes to be true LOL  
Alyssa
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9 posted 06-11-2001 05:36 PM       View Profile for Alyssa   Email Alyssa   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alyssa


     Q:   What do you call 10 blondes at the bottom of the pool?
     A:   Air pockets.

     Q:   Why does the blonde stand in front of a window during a
          thunder storm?
     A:   She loves having her picture taken  (flashes, got it?).

     Q:   How do you keep a blonde in suspense?
     A:   (I'll tell you tomorrow.)

     Q:   How do you keep a blonde busy?
     A:   Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.

     Q:   Why do blondes wear shoulder pads?
     A:   To keep from bruising their ears.

     Q:   How can you tell a blonde had a bad day?
     A:   Her tampon is behind her ear and she doesn't know what
          she did with her cigarette.
     Q:   Why do blondes hate M&Ms?
     A:   They're too hard to peel.

     Q:   How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate
          chip cookies?
     A:   You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

     Q:   What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory?
     A:   Proofreading.

     Q:   Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory?
     A:   For throwing out the W's.

     Q:   Why don't blondes like making KOOL-AID?
     A:   Because they can't fit 8 cups of water in the little
          packet.


"At nude weddings everybody can see the best man!" "I have a glass house with no windows" "Push to test...
Release to detonate..."

PhaerieChild
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since 08-30-99
Posts 1829
Aloha, Oregon


10 posted 06-11-2001 08:03 PM       View Profile for PhaerieChild   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PhaerieChild

What do you call 25 blondes standing ear to ear?
A wind tunnel

What do you call 25 blondes stacked on top of each other?
An air mattress.

How can you save me?
When the dark comes right in and takes me,
from my front walk and into bed,
where it kisses my face and eats my head. Shivaree

ethome
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since 05-14-2000
Posts 11545
New Brunswick Canada


11 posted 06-14-2001 06:08 AM       View Profile for ethome   Email ethome   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit ethome's Home Page   View IP for ethome

Two blonds were standing on opposite banks of a river, when one yelled over to the other and asked, "how do you get to the other side?"]
The other blond yelled back, "you're already on the other side!"
Marshalzu
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Lurking


12 posted 06-14-2001 11:01 AM       View Profile for Marshalzu   Email Marshalzu   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Marshalzu's Home Page   View IP for Marshalzu

ROTFLMAO... this is the best thread ever...
Alyssa
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13 posted 06-14-2001 08:04 PM       View Profile for Alyssa   Email Alyssa   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alyssa

Hey Mr. Zu go to teen chat and lok at the thread there too!


Q; How does a blond emoon walk?

A: she takes off her panties and scoots her butt* across the floor!

"At nude weddings everybody can see the best man!" "I have a glass house with no windows" "save a horse, ride a cowboy!!!"

Fading Away
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14 posted 06-16-2001 04:51 PM       View Profile for Fading Away   Email Fading Away   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Fading Away

Ok, the only one I know is kind of dirty... I don't know if it would be apropriate to share here.  But the ones I've read have kept me ROFL.  Heh..

--Marie

"You're the girl of my nightmares, erotic and skull-faced.
Anorexic Beauty, feather-weight perfection.  Anorexic Beauty, underweight goddess." --Pulp

bslicker
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state of mind


15 posted 06-18-2001 11:40 PM       View Profile for bslicker   Email bslicker   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bslicker

I am laughing so hard right now..... This was a great thread... BUMP bump BUMP
will return with some to add

A smile a day keeps the world in smile's.
Bernie Slicker

Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 12-21-1999
Posts 5742
Southern Abstentia


16 posted 06-23-2001 01:29 AM       View Profile for Local Rebel   Email Local Rebel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Local Rebel

my fondest story re: dumb blonde jokes is about Dolly Parton.. who when asked if she was insulted by them said:

"Why no honey, they don't bother me cause I know I'm not dumb and I'm not blonde either..!"

nite nite
 
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