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Passions in Poetry

An explanation, albeit weak and strong

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RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


0 posted 06-07-2000 07:32 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

I haven't been around for a little while, not cause I don't want to be but because I seem to have lost my zest for life...I have no patience....I get entirely fed up with my pc asking me for confirmation when asking to print soemthing...of course i said 'print' cause I want it to print, I mean, do you pour soup in a saucepan, light the gas/electric and expect a message saying "do you really want to heat this soup????...of course you don't...I think pc's are starting to make us brainless individuals....just like I get fed up of AOL kicking me off cause they think I went to sleep...if I went to sleep and then got a huge bill I'd soon learn to turn the damn thing off but I get so annoyed when they kick me off with no warning and it takes me 10 minutes to set everything up again....

unmetered service in the UK is disgusting, they are unprepared for the toll on their bandwidth and can't cope so they bring in cut-off periods of an hour....just as I'm in to my discussion, wham!!! they cut me off and for this they charge me...  

Adding to that I'm totally sick of trusting people only to be let down and bigtime, such that it really has affected me and I'm such a dancer, always kicking off my shoes and starting again but I'm tired, really tired of men, yep, that dreaded word...lol, saying " you can trust me"...ok, so I know there must be lots of women that men feel the same about, but I see good or try to see good in everyone and when I start isolating myself, I know I got hurt...so give me some good examples of when trust was good, when it was as it should be, whn you can rely on each other, when you know you are there, someone give me a reason to honour my faith...is this simply hurt talking?..no...it's years of battling against it and somehow I no longer have the sunshine to think or belive in it anymore, well I do, but I don't have the same strength to believe in what I once thought was the reason for relationships...I am FED UP of having my trust abused and still this little smile in my heart says..."one day sweetheart, you will have shoulders to rely on, words in which to believe in"

Sorry for the rant, but these past few weeks have taken their toll on me and I know it, to the point where I wonder why I bother to say anything or why anyone says anything to me, cause surely, that is what trust is all about?

Please, someone tell me my world will one day be right side up...that someday my trust will be equalled and honoured....that someday I won't stare in disbelief at words again...

[This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 06-07-2000).]
doreen peri
Member Rara Avis
since 05-25-99
Posts 8028
Virginia


1 posted 06-07-2000 07:41 PM       View Profile for doreen peri   Email doreen peri   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for doreen peri

me too
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


2 posted 06-07-2000 09:42 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

Trussed? A man..yeah that's the only trussed I can see a man having..oh! THAT trust! I know men I trust..it's hard to find them, so don't give up!!!!
wayoutwalt
Member Ascendant
since 06-22-99
Posts 5106
TEXAS (it's all big)


3 posted 06-07-2000 09:43 PM       View Profile for wayoutwalt   Email wayoutwalt   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for wayoutwalt

now this is what the alley was meant for wooee rant away rainbow we listen
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


4 posted 06-08-2000 07:16 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Awwwwwww! (((((BIG HUGS)))))

It will get better one day, it really will. It's getting through these days to get to that one that's a major pain the butt.

And AOL is the same way out here, the next thing you know you're not online anymore. Maybe we should all boycott them, whatcha say?
Here's hoping your sunshine comes back around soon Hon!
Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 08-02-99
Posts 9130
Purgatorial Incarceration


5 posted 06-08-2000 09:18 PM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher

I knew you couldn't keep away from me Cindy... admit it, you're hooked!  

HUGS
HUSG

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


6 posted 06-09-2000 06:22 AM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

May your rainy days be blessed with sunshine - to bring forth the most splendorous of rainbows...
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 07-17-99
Posts 8273


7 posted 06-09-2000 09:22 AM       View Profile for Severn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Severn



Hugs...
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


8 posted 06-09-2000 04:53 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

Sunshine's back!  Boy, I leave for a day and this whole place falls apart.  {~,^}

RG, I'm so glad you're back on line with us here.  What better place to re-charge your batteries!  Men?  After first divorce I WAS NOT repeat WAS NOT going to ever worry about one again.  Wasn't looking, didn't want.  BAM!  He snuck in on me, he did!  Don't want to rain on the parade, but YUP we'll have 20 under our belt in two weeks.

I've no REAL answers for you, just that HEY, you are SO entitled to yell, rant, scream and rave like a maniac here, in all places!  I'm just so glad to see your face again I could hug myself.  Oops, just did!

Now, I'm going to run up to the top of the forums and see if you've posted anything, just so I can reply to 'em!

HUGS and more HUGS, Sunshine...

 Sunshine

~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
Helen Keller ~~~

Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


9 posted 06-09-2000 05:44 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

RG, tried to send e-mail message, didn't work, wanted you to see this...

http://piptalk.com/pip/Forum25/HTML/001060.html

hugs, Sunshine

 Sunshine

~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
Helen Keller ~~~



[This message has been edited by Sunshine (edited 06-09-2000).]
RainbowGirl
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since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


10 posted 06-09-2000 08:35 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Thanks guys...I am in a mess and I know it as well....haven't even spoken to anyone for days, just don't know what to say...mostly they want to know what chemo is like, that happened, do I hurt....what the hell do they think, of course I hurt...LOL....but this trust factor has really got me down and it's so unusual for me, normally I can just pass stuff like this off and think to myself...well, what did I expect?...but I did trust 150% and I feel so pointless....we exchange words because we believe what we each say but what happens when that goes out the window?  I've been hurt loads of times but that was physically this is deep, seems to be like some kind of virus got me...

I'll get over it...I keep making excuses to myself, like maybe it's a new way to care...yep...sad, huh!

I'm off to look at your post, thanks.. and thanks for the smiles Sharon, I liked "trussed".......now why can't men be like women?  They never let me down and no, I'm not changing the habits of a lifetime..   Chris, we seem to have been in the same boat for a while but being younger..LOL, your brain adaps more readily than mine...I think..

HUGS all
poetFemmeFatale
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since 07-25-99
Posts 2961
Arkansas


11 posted 06-11-2000 03:00 AM       View Profile for poetFemmeFatale   Email poetFemmeFatale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for poetFemmeFatale

Uh....Jell-O doesn't have to adapt, it just jiggles.  
It has nothing to do with his youth, miss.  
* running outta here fast, before Chris smacks me!*
doreen peri
Member Rara Avis
since 05-25-99
Posts 8028
Virginia


12 posted 06-11-2000 10:42 AM       View Profile for doreen peri   Email doreen peri   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for doreen peri

ummm... don't understand poet femme fatale's response... maybe it's some inside joke i'm not privvy to... oh well... LOL

Rainbow Girl, i just wanted to let you know that if you ever want to talk, please feel free to email me. i've been known to have a caring ear. Prayers & kind thoughts to you.


[This message has been edited by doreen peri (edited 06-11-2000).]
Corazon
Senior Member
since 02-02-2000
Posts 1301


13 posted 06-12-2000 10:47 AM       View Profile for Corazon   Email Corazon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Corazon

I know rg....I hope you don't mistake my *not* asking about your chemo as not caring, I just figure you will talk if you need to (see above rant lol) and you know I love you..but was glad to find this thread, was getting worried...and yep I know...will have a mail for you in a bit....and I really don't know what to tell you about men...I look at other cars (men in particular) in traffic, more of curiosity than anything else, and wonder who they go home to, who is their soulmate...and who is mine?......no answers for you...just hugs and hopes for us all  
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


14 posted 06-12-2000 06:33 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Doreen: I'm not sure either but maybe PFF meant that one has to move with the times, I'm not sure...because trust shouldn't be adaptable but secure...I don't know how else to put that...sorry if it offends anyone...

Thanks for the offer of an ear, I tend to keep much to myself, I get a little embarrassed at even feeling hurt these days, probably because we see so much of the "move on lady/man, you deserve more"...and somehow that is meaningless to me..trust is trust and should be sacred or at least meaningful or what the hell is the point...I count myself as an intelligent individual, I know the differnce between a playboy and a genuine person...or perhaps I don't...I don't understand the guidelines anymore but simply excepting that you got 'hurt' isn't good enough for me....I want something I can rely on and I think we all do but maybe I'm just getting old...LOL...

Seriously, I do find it hard to say I'm hurt but I am and I don't know how else to put it..


HUSG


Corazon:  I know, we keep in touch butsomehow I find it easier to be bright and witty in mail than to say I'm so down and I ache and I'm fed up with crying and somoen please give me a foolproof method that gets your life back in order when things go so utterly pearshaped other than that odd moment when you tell yourself you're a fool as you wipe the tears away...it's not a case of wanting to be sad, but that you are sad but you want to be your usual smiling, witty self, I love the sun, I love humour and being fun and smiling...but I can't seem to find any of it, either in me or anyone else and I know it starts with me and if I can't feel it, I can't expect to find it...huh?...I know what I mean and I hope that tomorrow will be better but I suspect it will take a lot of tomorrows and that is such a shame for such a laughing girl like me and I know it...

Big HUSG
Denise
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Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


15 posted 06-12-2000 08:27 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

I'm so sorry for everything you have gone through and are going through, Cindy. It can't be easy. You're right, trust is something that you should be able to count on come hell or high water, otherwise, what is the point? I think it is something that we all need, deep down inside. I wish you brighter tomorrows. HUGS

Denise
RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


16 posted 06-13-2000 06:26 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Thanks again....I know how busy everyone is and there is so much to reply to and therefore each reply is more meaningful...so time is precious..  ..and I can't stop this sneezing or coughing and being polite, I keep covering my mouth but I'm sure Snoops takes no notice..  

The sun will shine tomorrow and around 6am it will wake me as it rises over the dawn and chases shadows across the fields and I'll be there to watch it, there's a couple of swan's that try to fly around that time and the sound of their wings flapping is temendous because it's always so silent here first thing, you can hear the birds singing to each other and the flowers as they open and say good morning...silly me, but I do love these small graces of nature....I'll always enjoy the sun rising, the sun setting, the moon and stars fighting for light or which can twinkle the most, the wonderful way nature has of putting things in perspective, it just makes my eyes smile..  

HUGS



[This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 06-13-2000).]
 
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