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Passions in Poetry

No wonder!!!

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Elizabeth
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America the beautiful


0 posted 10-26-2000 12:06 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

I read a story about a girl who was unhappy, had no friends, and was the school outcast. She was also fat. Then one day, she began to lose the extra pounds, and all of a sudden, she has all these great, wonderful friends, she's thin and beautiful, and now she's happy.

This is the reason eating disorders are affecting so many people. When you're fat, you don't like yourself. But when you're thin and beautiful, all of a sudden you realize that-gasp!-you really aren't that bad of a person. Those "I was a fat loser, but now look at me! I'm thin and so now I'm so much happier with myself!" stories really piss me off. No wonder people feel the need to starve themselves or make themselves throw up everything they've eaten. Other people's 'success stories' are such an influence on them. This really makes me MAD!

Elizabeth


You cling to your ways and leave mine to me.
Suum cuique.
~Elizabeth


Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


1 posted 10-26-2000 01:18 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

People magazine this week devotes several pages to people who died to be thinner. Some through liposuction, some with drugs, some with anorexia. It truly is sad.

Everyone may know who Cindy Crawford is..what she looks like...but how many know Cameron Manheim?
serenity blaze
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since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


2 posted 10-26-2000 01:24 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

I do agree with you, Elizabeth.  And there's much to be thought about here, starting with society's standard and media input, and what we, as the public, buy in to.  But eating disorders are a very complex issue.  Quite often it has only to do with a subconscious desire to be in "control" of some aspect--ANY ASPECT--of the person's life.  I learned this from a dear friend who once weighed 82 lbs.  Through counseling, and (sigh) medication she is now a healthy 125 lbs.

Thank you for this post...It is a subject that also makes me a bit irate.  And don't even get me started on breast implants.  My philosophy has always been, if that is the price of "beauty" well, thank god, I don't have to look at me!  And ya know, somehow I've done alright anyway.  
Erin
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since 06-15-2000
Posts 2681
~Chicago~


3 posted 10-26-2000 01:37 PM       View Profile for Erin   Email Erin   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Erin

I think that with the way society is today it puts a pressure on girls. They look at all these famous people and see how thin they are that it brings it to their minds that they should look like that. But thats not it, God made us all in his own little way. We are made of all different shapes and sizes. I know that their are things about myself that I wish I could change but I dont want to because I am unique just the way I am. And its sad that people do this. There are different ways to get rid of what you dont want.

~*Love is sometimes like a rose. Beautiful in the beginning but dies in the end.*~
Local Rebel
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since 12-21-1999
Posts 5742
Southern Abstentia


4 posted 10-27-2000 01:39 PM       View Profile for Local Rebel   Email Local Rebel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Local Rebel

wellllllll......

the truth lies -- somewhere in the middle -- rofl..

but seriously -- our culture markets everything to us in such a way that we will percieve it will make us happy -- including food -- so it comes at us from all angles -- there's more money being spent to market obesity than what gets spent on thinning:

there's nothing like the face of a kid eatin a hershey bar...

mcdonald's -- cause we deserve a break today -- they love to see us smile -- yanno...

ad nauseum...

one should not aspire to be Ally Mcbeal or Cameron Manheim (although I think Cameron is sexy in her own way)

the goal should be health -- the fact is -- we have an extremely obese nation mired in lifestyles of inactivity -- this has led to almost epidemic levels of diabetes --

establish an active instead of sedentary lifestyle -- eat properly (a balanced diet of protein, complex carbohydrate, and fibrous vegetables  -- 5 to 6 times a day in small meals) and let the flesh fall where it may...
RainbowGirl
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since 07-31-99
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United Kingdom


5 posted 10-27-2000 05:31 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Good subject Elizabeth....

I read today that based on a survey of Cosmo subscribers the average dress size for women today is 14/16....and they're happy with it..

I do think we're fed this image of stringy models and of course men drool over them but hey, how many men want to feel bones in bed???  oooops, but I do think men like to feel softness and warmth and most women want to be attractive to their partner so see them drooling and want to change, but...which woman did he ask out? Which woman did he marry?  Ok, so as you get a little older your proportions change but surely by that time so has his!!!!

HUGS
StarPryncess17
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since 05-31-2000
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Colorado


6 posted 10-27-2000 08:54 PM       View Profile for StarPryncess17   Email StarPryncess17   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit StarPryncess17's Home Page   View IP for StarPryncess17

ok...at the risk of sounding a hypocrite, I do believe that eating disorders are bad and society pushes them on girls. All we can really do is get pissed because it just isn't right. As for me, I'm a model and constantly battle anorexia. I do not I repeat, I do not think I am fat or ugly. I know I am cute (not conceited, but I have to have some confidence for the fact that I am a model. please don't take that the wrong way though) and I know I am not fat...who could be at 5'4 3/4" and 92 pounds?!?! But, it is something I can control and something that I find has become almost habit. There is a lot of competition in the modelling industry...no one wants to be the girl who got cut because she gained a few pounds...

Excellent point Elizabeth!


*Being an angel doesn't mean having a halo or wings, it means doing the right thing and wanting to make a difference*

RainbowGirl
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since 07-31-99
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United Kingdom


7 posted 10-27-2000 09:22 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

92 lbs /14 = geesh, under 7 stone

Ok, you probably have a tiny bone structure...hope so....and yes, I know the exhileration of being a model, know the downside too....but well said...how old are you though? I'm a skinny twit, didn't do the Milan catwalks or any significant coming out ceremony....Just keep telling it how it is and eventually...we will all recognise that human beings are like cats,

tabbies: fat and thin,
silver striped
or marginally thin
maybe a Siamese
cloaked blue eyes
devil within
then there's the Persian
such fur to comb
pitiful cries
loving looks
straight between the eyes

Takes all sorts and we love them all....

  )

[This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 10-27-2000).]
Christopher
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since 08-02-99
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Purgatorial Incarceration


8 posted 10-27-2000 11:15 PM       View Profile for Christopher   Email Christopher   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Christopher

Philip thinks I'm fat... should I go on a diet???  
StarPryncess17
Senior Member
since 05-31-2000
Posts 944
Colorado


9 posted 10-28-2000 01:52 PM       View Profile for StarPryncess17   Email StarPryncess17   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit StarPryncess17's Home Page   View IP for StarPryncess17

I am 16...I'll be 17 in January. You are right...we are like cats, and we love all cats...why can't we love all humans too?!?! aarrgghh, the realities of being human!

Chris~dear god! you fat cow!! go on a diet this second!!!!!! I'm only kidding! I probably shouldn't be talking...hahahaha kidding again and NO Chris you no need diet! hehehe


*Being an angel doesn't mean having a halo or wings, it means doing the right thing and wanting to make a difference*

Alicat
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since 05-23-99
Posts 4277
Coastal Texas


10 posted 10-28-2000 03:04 PM       View Profile for Alicat   Email Alicat   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alicat

Hmmm....yanno, I don't know....I do know that I'm thin, and unhappy with that at times. I'm 5'9" and the most I've ever weighed is 145. Currently, I hover around 130. Now, there are many bad things with this:

1) When I get sick, I shed weight. If I don't have the excess slack for the body to use, the body will use whatever it can find, so I lose more weight, which gets me weaker and unable to fight the illness...the spiral wiggles downward.

2) Clothing. Do you know how hard it is for a guy to find casual business pants that are 28x34? Those I have to wear on my hips, when I can find them. If I size my waist, 26, the pants will barely get over my calves. I hit 3 clothing stores yesterday, and the closest I found to my size was a 30x34...it's discrimination, I tell ya....

3) General well being. I felt a whole lot better when I was 145. But I find it near on impossible to gain weight. Exercise helps a little, but I have to consume scads of calories to make this happen, and that costs money. Weight gain formulas just give me expensive excretions. And there are NO over-the-counter diets pills to slow down your metabolism, or at least that I've been able to find. I'm waiting until mid-life, since that's when metalbolism traditionally changes, but that's still a ways off.

Hmm...does anyone have about 50 extra pounds that my body would not reject that they might be able to air-flight down?
serenity blaze
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11 posted 10-28-2000 03:20 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

chris, no...I don't think you should go on a diet...but don't wear the white shorts--makes yer butt look big...hehehe
Elizabeth
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America the beautiful


12 posted 10-28-2000 09:14 PM       View Profile for Elizabeth   Email Elizabeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Elizabeth's Home Page   View IP for Elizabeth

Very good points, everyone...my friend is about the same height as me, 5'2" or so, and she ways 92 pounds...she was going to be a model but they wanted her to lose those two so she would weigh exactly 90, and she said hell no, so she couldn't model. Anyway, what really got to me about the aforementioned story was the attitude of the girl herself. When she was fat, she didn't like herself. When she was thin, she was self-confident. That does not send out a good message. I know there are health reasons for weight loss, but we have reached an extreme by this time.

Elizabeth


You cling to your ways and leave mine to me.
Suum cuique.
~Elizabeth


LoveBug
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13 posted 10-29-2000 04:21 PM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

A word from the fat girl...

This world is rough on overweight people, or even people who are a healthy size. For example, I've been involved in community theater for two years. Both years, I have been commended for my ablities, but I have never gotten a leading role. I have been called back (which means that you are REALLY being considered for a role) for all four plays I have been in. This year, one of my good friends was stage manager, and she was with the director throughout the casting process. When the call came that I was in the chorus (again), I called her and begged her to tell the truth. She told me that he said I was the best one there, but I "just wasn't the type". The "type", for girls, is under size 6. There is also a "type" for guys, but it isn't as harsh as the one for us girls. Evidence of the screwed up society we live in is always popping up in my life, especally my love life. Unreturned love is the story of my life, and I'm sure one of the reasons for this is my appearance. I know that I don't really want someone who loved me for the way I looked, but it stops people from getting to know me. I'm not huge or anything... but I guess since I don't wear a size 6, life is going to be a little harder on me.

That's why I love the internet so much. People are more open to each other. We are all friends, and most of us will never see each others' faces. The only way we can make an impression on here are with the things that really count, with our inner beauty. These are the things that shine here...

Too bad the rest of the world isn't the same.



False gems may shine as brightly as the genuine article, but there are always those who can tell the difference.


Isis
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since 09-06-99
Posts 6390
Sunny Queensland


14 posted 10-29-2000 06:58 PM       View Profile for Isis   Email Isis   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Isis's Home Page   View IP for Isis

Childishly I married a man that thinks this way.  He is so damn opinionated against bigger people.  Quote - 'Oh why would anyone want to listen to what he/she is saying look at the size of them!!'

I called a halt to this behaviour in front of my son Dylan.  He has to learn to be able to judge people for WHO and what they are, not how big they are or what nationality.

I sing publicly when possible and the same thing goes - how many fat female singers do you know????  There are a couple sure but they made it when they were thin, would they make it now with the weight.

Actually I like large people, 90% of them laugh more than most, happy, jolly types.  Sure it could be an act to fit in, so people will want to be with them, but 9 out 10 times it is genuine.

They can be smart, win pulitzer prizes etc.  But that is only if they get the job in the first place again looks come into play.

It is so unfair and so unjust, but some people are body size racist, just like people racist.  They will never change.  And unfortuneatly it is the big person that usually suffers by their hand, not getting that job, that role, that friendship etc.

I myself juggled my weight when leaving school/college and living in the real world.  I ate the same but wasn't as busy physically so I didn't burn off the wait as I'd used to in school.  It took a while to realise and when I did I changed my eating and exercise routines and I'm fine now.

It is also proven that genetically you can be predisposed to gaining weight, ie if your family is fat there is a good chance you will be predisposed to being that way yourself.  But you don't have to allow that to happen.

My biological family are fat, I know it is in my genes, but I dont have to be lazy and eat too much either.

I have to watch myself.  Always have.  Most do.

But that still doesn't mean people have the right to judge us by appearance alone.  Some large people have thyaroid problems and cannot help the way they are etc.

Like all of you I just wish people weren't so quick to judge a book by it's cover, but take you for your merits and being and personality those things are what matter....

There's my 6 cents worth..
Isis

*I believe every time you put your words to paper, you change. Each feeling is set free, and you may follow.....*
~Isis~Goddess~~Sovereign of the Sp
 
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