Colon, MI USA
Ron has always been just a mild-mannered Moderator, working for the Daily Passion. That way, when he's been staring at the screen for the 18th straight hour and hits that "Delete All Forums" link, the system tells him that he doesn't have that kind of power. And by the time he finds an empty phone booth, he's fallen asleep and the danger has passed.
Makes sense when you think about it, uh?
(Sharon, what's that green glowing rock you have in your hand? ARRrrrgggggg)