Sitting in Michael's Lap
Where to begin..?
Jeremy, allow me to assure you that you have not been singled out. You are not the first, nor will you be the last poet to have his work pulled from the forums (especially Dark) for content.
Those of us who have been around for a while have heard all the rants about free speech, equal rights, and the evils of censorship. Heck, some of us have even been flag-wavers ourselves (yes, guilty -- LOL) when the heat of the moment and righteous indigantion seemed to warrant it.
When the smoke cleared, however, some of us realized the greater implications of our irresponsibility -- and yes, that is what it is -- and apologized for acting like children who were told they couldn't have ice cream before dinner (yes, guilty again). The rest, who just couldn't seem to fathom the error of their ways, left.
And Passions went on.
Jeremy, I don't know you ... and I admit I never read the offending post. I'm not sure I would want to. Granted, I've written my share of suicide poetry, and even dealt with the reality once -- not something I care to remember. In short, all my poetry about suicide ended up exactly where it belonged -- in the trash, right along with the VERY BAD idea which spawned it. Yes, Jeremy, suicide is real ... too real, if you ask me. Not to mention very final.
Perhaps your poetry is a way for you to reach out to others and ask for their help, or sympathy, or whatever it is you think you need. In a perfect world, that would be a wonderful thing ... but as I believe this post has demonstrated, the world is far from perfect. OK, Jeremy, so you're having a bad day. Or a bad life. You write poetry, you bleed your emotions into the words, you get your release ... and perhaps, you feel better. Your work has done its job, for you.
Now, let me give you a hypothetical (though not unlikely) situation: I am a teenager who reads in Dark Passions because the poetry there closely resembles my current emotional state. I live in a home with a stepmother who hates me, I just found out that my boyfriend (who I swear I am in love with) is cheating on me, and I can't seem to do well in school no matter how hard I try. Maybe I'm overweight. Maybe my features don't quite fit the description "beautiful." Maybe any one of a million other things is going wrong in my life that makes me think that it might not be worth going on. Maybe, just maybe, I'm walking the edge.
Oh sure, there's fear ... I mean, death is death, and there's no turning back, right..? If only I could work up the courage, it would be so easy ...
And then I read your poem. Did it come straight out and say "Kill yourself, it'll be neat..?" No. But it was so moving ... so beautiful ... so ... well, poetic.
Maybe, just maybe, someday Jeremy will write a poem about me.
And so it begins.
I am going to assume that you have a conscience, and that the above scenario truly frightened you. You may not care about your own life, Jeremy, and if such is the case, I pray that you have those around you who do. I hope someone can show you that suicide is not the answer.
In the meantime, I ask that you not give that hypothetical "me" one more reason to add to the many I already have ... because you never know, it might be the last one I need.
Sorry for the drama.