dreamer1 12 5 24
HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY
This was e-mailed to me and it was so funny I had to post it. Enjoy!
(This was funny for the most part- I think #14 is disrespectful to the amazing art of poetry, but oh well)
1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car w/sunglasses on and point a hair
dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2) Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3) Insist that your e mail address is: Xena-Warrior-Princess@OCDSB.edu.on.ca
4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with
5) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
6) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over
their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
7) In the memo field of all your cheques , write " FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS".
8) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
9) Dont use any punctuation
10) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
11) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.
12) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
13) Sing along at the opera.
14) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
15) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds
16) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party
because you're not in the mood.
17) Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.
18) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won!", "I Won!" "3rd time
19) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling
"Run for your lives, they're loose!"
20) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to
have to let one of you go."
And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity....
21) Copy this and e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they have already sent it
to you or have asked you not to send them stuff like this.
....peace as a primary objective is dangerous because it implies that we would sacrifice any principle for the sake of it....