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Internet Love?!
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Internet Love?! |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. 
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Here's a little topic I'm sure will get tons of debate and comments on.... ( Which is good- I'd enjoy hearing some opinions on the matter.) Internet Love. Quite the controversial subject. So how about it folks? Is it a hoax, or could 2 people randomly IM eachother and find instant love? Perhaps some of you may have even experienced this first hand. As for me...I personally have not experienced internet love. Yes, I believe the internet is a great tool in meeting new people and getting to know the person in ways never imagined, however, the face-to-face contact with the person and the interactions between the 2 people is important in the "love" area. So- I'm going to have to side with it being a hoax. Anyone else agree? Disagree? |
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helen smith Member
since 2001-03-12
Posts 240 |
Spice..there is no explanation..it is real .. it is an addiction.. I know |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
There is way too many variables involved in this. 1. they say its true and better cause couples fall in love with each others personality. downside --- are both individuals really showing their true self. the internet is so diverse that people can easily create different characters. well, i'll add more next time "So long as men can breathe or eyes can see, |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
My son and his wife met in a chat room almost four years ago. They've been married for three years (without one fight!) and are expecting a baby in August. So it can happen, but.....they met right away so it didn't get dragged out. I think if the person you 'fall for' doesn't agree to meet you after a month or so, then become wary. If there's a problem with finances, then at least ask for a phone number and talk to each other. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
I met a girl on the internet when I was 15 and she was 12. I have been talking to her for the past 3yrs and she's managed to become my one true friend in this world. After a while I fell in love with her and she fell in love with me. We met on march 28th and things worked out magically. I will be attending a university 2 hours from her location and we plan on starting something out. Yes it can happen because it did, and I didn't meet her right away. I met her 3 YEARS later. Oh and random info....she lives in Alabama and I live in Puerto Rico....so the distance is amazingly far, but not for long.   |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Aww.. that's so great, Javi! I'm happy for you As for internet love, I don't think that anything else needs to be said. Yes, it is real, and yes, it can happen to anyone. --Marie subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart. |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Why yes... I know several people who found it... quite the experience I'm sure... All obscurity starts with a danger: |
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Jesse Jaymz Senior Member
since 2000-01-24
Posts 708Youngstown, ohio |
good topic. it can happen and has for me. but also like has been said you dont get to know the real person at times. with me if anything i am more of the real me on here. cuz on here i dont have to worry about people judging me. the real me is the one that is in my poetry. but as for internet love i met a girl off the net awhile ago. and me and her became best friends. then things started to get rough here at home so she said why dont you come live with me. i said sure. so we set the date for about a month later for her to pick me up. well from the time she said that to the time she picked me up me and her fell in love. and it was great. i lived there for 2 months till some probloms made me come back home. had some health stuff to take care of. and i told her i would be back by easter. we talked on the net everynight till easter. she was gonna come up. she cannceled last minute. i was depressed. considering i was gonna ask her to marry me that weekend. so about a month went by and she was gonna come up in may on our 6 month anny. i had the perfect weekend planed. taking her to niagra falls and gonna ask her to marry me there. i wrote her this huge poem asking her too. well that morning she cancelled. i was very down. didnt hear from her all weekend. not even on our anny. so i called her the night of our anny and her son (who still loves me to death) answered and i asked wheres mom. he gave her the phone and i asked her why i havent heard from you. she said get online we need to talk. turns out she cheated on me that ngiht. i was heartbroken. i gave her the poem that i wrote asking her to marry me and she said that she was confused and needed time. meanwhile he moved in with her and married her 2 months later. she lied to me. hid behind the comp. it really hurt and still hurts to this day. so is internet love real?? yes. and it can be just as painful. if not more painful. i dont know if i could trust someone with my heart like that again. and if i do it will be a very long time  i got to go...All I feel is hurt and sorrow, praying it'll all be gone by tomorrow but as tomorrow rolls around, another tear hits the ground. |
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dragonpoe Senior Member
since 2000-11-12
Posts 608Palm Bay, Florida |
I agree with it being an addiction, and a sort of high playing fantasy game. But real? As in future expanding real? I don't believe so. It's hard enough to love some one you see and are with everyday, because there are always quirks and stuff that get in the way and just make us human, but over the internet, there aren't those quirks, it's too perfect, too made up. People need touch and eye to eye contact, and though nowadays with those camera things, you can see each other, how do you touch and expand that "love" into physical fulfillment? Besides, there's a lot of wackos out there, but I am not saying that every one is bad. Just a risky game. But people need people to hold and kiss and get close to in order to really experience love. But infatuation, and fantasy bliss is absolutely out there over the great interactive waves of technology. With the word, I am mighty, with the pen I am free.. |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
Wow. Thanks for the responses. Jesse Jaymz- Thats a horrible story. I'm terribly sorry. And Dopey_Dope- you met her? By the tone of your message I'm assuming things worked out between you two? Can I ask you this? And you too Jesse Jaymz ( Since you 2 seem to be the only 2 people with actual basis for your opinions and not basing it on a friends etc emotions.) When you and your Internet Love met... what was that like? Completely changing from behind screen to having the person right infront of you...that must have been a hard and an emotional transition. In the movie " You've got mail." Meg Ryan says that on the net you are more likely to talk alot about nothing then something...Could you still do that face to face? Or was it different? As for the non believers...Acire-I see your exact point on people not showing their true sides. Thats one of the main things that has me completely skeptical. And dragonpoe- You just backed up my beliefs...Thankgod- I was starting to feel like the only one who doubted the Internet Love concept. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
When I met her I was in awe. After 3 years we could finally touch.Finally see eye to eye. Finally be able to be who we were IN PERSON. It was amazing. At first it was nerve wrecking. It lasted for about 5minutes for me. I was real nervous, but compared to her I was calm as a cucumber. It took her a while but she got ok after a bit. We talked about what we do on the net. Everyting and nothing all rolled up into one long, fun, amazing conversation. We realized that it wasn't just the net, and it wasn't this made up false fantasy that we created to distance ourselves from the real world. It was real, true, and pure to what the real world basis the meaning of love upon. Is love not a mental connection that is so impacting that it overwhealms your mind, body, and soul? Well if that's what it is, then it can happen on the net and I am living proof of it. I met her, and it was perfect. It was just like it is on the net cept we get to TOUCH. I'm back in Puerto Rico now so I'm back into the net thing with her, but this will only go on for another 4 months. Then i'll be forever hers. |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
I have to cast myself with the believers...I have experienced love thru this screen...love that grew with each message...then phone calls...and ended the same way...with a message saying he had been killed in a wreck...the pain I felt was REAL...the tears I cried were REAL...the emptiness I feel is still very much REAL...I think its very much like the real world...there are players everywhere...just as there are lonely vulnerable people...but there are also real live people on the other end of this line...people who for one reason or the other dont meet people in their day to day life...so they turn to this...and the companionship they find here...whether it be in a place like Passions, or a local chat room... |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
i think that some in some respects the computer makes it easier for people to hide certain things or cover up things about themselves, but on the other end of the spectrum sometimes talking online makes it easier to be yourself and say things that you might be too shy to say in person. i think that internet love is certainly possible and just as real as falling in love with someone that you can see on a daily basis. Jesse, dude, your luck with women has been really tough thus far, i feel for you. i'm sending lots of love from VA at this very moment And Javi, i'm really happy for you, your sttory made me smile. i wish you nothing but the best Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
Dopey just one question. Isn't she just a little young to be getting involved with. She's 15 and your 18. Sorry guess it's my mother instinct coming out. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Inot= No worries. I have asked her the same question. She knows where I am coming from. I am one to only like long-term relationships and due to her age it makes me a bit shaky to get involved with her due to her lack of experience with other guys. She hasn't been out there in the world to BE involved with other men, but lemme tell you.....she's been out there long enough to realize that she is in love with me. That (in her opinion) I'm special and like no other she's ever met. I respect that she feels she could become my girlfriend and not want to be with another. Your mother instincts are quite correct, and I take that as a form of trying to make ME realize that maybe it's not the right move. I thank you But I have delved within this situation from a lot of angles. I have conversed with her about this and everything looks great. She is 15, about to turn 16, but she is very mature and believe me.....I wouldn't be with a girl otherwise. |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
Ok Dopey I respect your answer. Considering I married at 17 to a 19 year old, and we have been married over 31 years I do know that young love can work. Good luck to you and your girlfriend.  |
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OLIAS Senior Member
since 2000-06-20
Posts 1090Pearl city Iowa |
I just got online after 3 weeks and your discussion caught my eye straight away, as at this very moment my girlfriend is on her way back to chicago on her way back to Iowa. It was her first visit here (England) and we have had 24 marvellous days together. We met in a chat room 2 years ago, we chat every night without fail, I have been over to the states to see her a few times and two weeks ago I asked her to be my wife and she agreed, yipeee. I suppose we are very lucky we have never been under any illusions about what we were getting into, meeting for a few weeks every six months, not having alot of the things which many couples take for granted, but these difficulties have made us very strong together and we couldn't possibly comprehend living in a world without each other, so.... yes internet love works, at times you are lonely, frustrated misunderstood angry, all the things that most relationships go through, but theres no maximum mileage for love wether it be 2 or 20,000, there is just a belief in each other. Regards, Olias. |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Actually she's not my gf yet......we have a lot of discussing about our lives and a bit of sorting out to do....we have to comprehend the complete picture of all the revolving circumstances around us. So the title pends. |
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kitkat Senior Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 878Nova Scotia |
Love has many different meanings. I was one who thought internet Love could not happen. I was wrong.(self promo here) check out my story in Prose. /pip/Forum15/HTML/001098.html Before we had the internet there was pen pals. And from the stories I hear there has been more than 1 love story that came out of that. Falling in Love with the person on the screen it happens. Is it a True and honest Love. YES it is. Yes because it is what that person feels.But I also believe for it to be a complete Love you must be able to interact in real time. To be able to touch see and smell. To fill your heart completely for must fill all your senses. Love can have no boundries it is only people who decide what their limits shall be. [This message has been edited by kitkat (edited 04-21-2001).] |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
CONGRATULATIONS OLIAS.. that is AWESOME!!!  K |
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Tamma
since 2000-01-17
Posts 794In His Arms, Harpers Ferry, WV |
I just met a guy a few days ago that I've been talking to for years. But it felt kinda as if I was cheating. You see, He only lives about an hour away, and he knows my best friend and my brother, but we met online beforemy friend moved here, and before i got close to my brother...Its was rather odd. He's great, and hes one of the best friends I've ever had. He's even going to my prom, with one of my friends. I don't think love wil ever come of it, but he's a great guy, and a wonderful friend. Those girls on TV don't know that being |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
OOPS! Forgot about this post- BUT! Thanks everyone for all the replies! Although- I didn't think the topic would be so one-sided. I thought SURELY there would be more than 2-3 non believers in the 20 people that replied..........oh well...shows what I know- right? |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
I am not a non-believer either, but I have seen it from the other side. An internet attraction can be a terrible thing, especially if one or both of them are already involved with someone else. I don't want to go into my story now. I just want to say to all those who are looking for love this way, "Just be careful that the one of your dreams is everything they say they are. You may not find out until it's too late" Dee I wish you every happiness and may you always have the best of the good things in life. a brand |
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Christopher
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-02
Posts 8296Purgatorial Incarceration |
Internet Love is for the birds. Christopher *tweet-tweet* |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
it can happen.... but meeting, phone calls and regular communication are vital and also trust. but if two people feel the love it can work but sooner or later it has to leave the confines of the net and become part of the real world. "you are what you own in this land, you can be king and it all depends on the view and what you can see" Whipping boy |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Yes, I know it can be real, not from personal experience, though I had a bit of an internet thing with two exes, I had already known them in person. But my close friend is right now happy as can be due to an internet meeting working out very well. And I expect it to last, they are wonderful together. |
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Allysa 
since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952In an upside-down garden |
I think that some people can find love on the internet, and some can't. I happen to be one of those people who can't seem to find it, although I've tried. I mean, I try, reallly I do, but the internet has cause some "love problems" for me. I still haven't figured it out either. But I don't want to bring it up. I choose to remember the FUN part of Valentine's Day, not the some what betrayl part. Whatever. I'm happy for you Dopes, but personally, I choose to find love the old fashioned way. Pure DUMB luck! (and loads of telephone conversations!) I know you're in a better place and though I cannot see your face, I know you're smiling down on me, saying everything's okay. ~R Kelly (I wish) |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well Allysa, I'm happy you're happy for me, but it didn't quite work out. Some complications came along and stuff happened. So now me and the girl are only best friends. |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
Internet love...can it happen? sure, why? cuz two people can connect more on the internet the first time they talk than if they were sitting face to face. it's a truer kind of love. you get to know the person before you ever really see their face. that is supposing the person isn't lying to you about who they are. which would be awful...but for me,what you see is what you get. sarcasm, which is really a need for attention, and a hyper chic, haha! ~Don't frown. You never know who is falling in love with your smile.~ |
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Punk Angel Member
since 2001-07-25
Posts 66Pennsylvania, US |
ok, i believe in internet love, but i hope it never happens to me, i dont want that kind of a relationship with neone! we love what is lost, but does what we lost love us back?? |
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