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Passions in Poetry

Translucence

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Monk Frost I!
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since 06-15-2008
Posts 79


0 posted 03-06-2009 11:12 PM       View Profile for Monk Frost I!   Email Monk Frost I!   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Monk Frost I!

Bright the stars during a clear night
Opaque a half moon near translucent
Full the sky not a cloud in sight
Silent before the crickets chirp
Windows open we drift off to sleep
To dream of a tomorrow as perfect

© Copyright 2009 Terry Ridener - All Rights Reserved
pontyjim
Junior Member
since 03-06-2009
Posts 40
Ontario, Canada


1 posted 03-06-2009 11:25 PM       View Profile for pontyjim   Email pontyjim   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit pontyjim's Home Page   View IP for pontyjim

Hey Monk Frost. I like it. kind of a quirky, e.e. cummings feel to it. One thing, I would watch the meter a bit more carefully. Try reading it out loud and notice where the emphasis lands. Nice one.
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