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Passions in Poetry

Joshua Trees

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oceanvu2
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since 02-24-2007
Posts 1007
Santa Monica, California, USA


0 posted 01-15-2009 07:55 PM       View Profile for oceanvu2   Email oceanvu2   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for oceanvu2

Joshua Trees


Joshua trees may possibly be
The ugliest trees implanted.
When they collapse to litter by chance
It's almost as if God recanted.
© Copyright 2009 Jim Aitken - All Rights Reserved
Alison
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Member Rara Avis
since 01-27-2008
Posts 9055
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!


1 posted 01-15-2009 11:48 PM       View Profile for Alison   Email Alison   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alison

I saw my first Joshua Trees last year and thought they looked like something out of a Dr Seuss book.  In fact, I am convinced that the good Doctor went to the Arizona desert and got his grand ideas for his children's books.  I am sure that I am incorrect, but the trees and vegetation look like they stepped out of his pages.

I really like your poem because those are among the ugliest trees that I have ever seen.  No, they are the ugliest trees that I ever saw.  In fact, they are so ugly that they fascinated me.

Wish I had some critique to offer you, but I don't.  I just came across your poem and remembered -- and enjoyed.

Alison
GoGore
Junior Member
since 01-05-2009
Posts 11


2 posted 01-16-2009 01:12 AM       View Profile for GoGore   Email GoGore   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for GoGore

Not exactly a succulent fruit, but maybe bearing seedless fruits. One thing though, they generally pass their ugliness on to the next generation without any real sign of advancement.

I wonder what the old fallen ones will be teaching their children a hundred years from now as far as morals and values...

One thing, I think "may" in line one might be too... polite for such an ingrate tree, or even such an ugly tree; maybe can will give a feeling of genuine distaste? I dunno maybe I'm out of line, I think so...

Great poem!
Go.
oceanvu2
Senior Member
since 02-24-2007
Posts 1007
Santa Monica, California, USA


3 posted 01-16-2009 01:51 AM       View Profile for oceanvu2   Email oceanvu2   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for oceanvu2

GoGo -- you're not out of line, I'm just giving the trees ultimate ugliness a bit of a break.  Tamarisks don't turn me on either.

Best, Jimbeaux
viking_metal
Senior Member
since 02-02-2007
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.


4 posted 01-19-2009 11:13 PM       View Profile for viking_metal   Email viking_metal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for viking_metal

This was bomb-diggity, Jim. Can you email me? There's some stuff I'd like to talk to you about.

Some people fall in love and touch the sky, some people fall in love and find quicksand.

oceanvu2
Senior Member
since 02-24-2007
Posts 1007
Santa Monica, California, USA


5 posted 01-21-2009 10:00 PM       View Profile for oceanvu2   Email oceanvu2   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for oceanvu2

Hi Paul!  "Bomb-diggity," I like that.  You know I write a lot of four-liners for the fun of it.  

Sure, I'll talk.  email me through my PiP contact address above, and we'll do some catching up.

Best, Jimmy
 
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