i wrote this poem awhile back its called unique. Tell me what you think.

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Critical Analysis #2

i wrote this poem awhile back its called unique. Tell me what you think.

sklagurl17
Junior Member

since 2008-09-08

Posts 43
nc.

0 posted 2008-09-08 02:31 AM

In a room that's full of dark
Pictures and pieces of colorful art
Its not full of evil but full of sin
And no one will let the light come in
Feelings of anger bottled inside
For such a little girl who should have nothing to hide
She fears what no one should fear
For her peers to come near to snicker and sneer
This little girl is so smart and unigue
For shes a spinning dart found at the boutique
She wishes to have a normal life
Shes tired of using bloody knives
Deep into her heart theres true love
This beautiful dove so pure and white
Just as a loving family is full of delight
This little girl as you can simply see...
Is the dark part of you and of me

chopsticks
Senior Member

since 2007-10-02

Posts 888
The US,

1 posted 2008-09-10 09:38 AM

“ Tell me what you think “

Hi sklagurl17 welcome , you picked a tough subject to write about, so be careful what you ask for. I wouldn’t get up out of the electric chair to write a poem about a ~cutter~ You didn’t either and it shows. I’m not being unkind , it’s just a toughie to write about.

I do hope one of the poetry Gurus points out your technical mistakes, what is CA for if not for that.

Btw ~cutters~ are not unique there are about 2 million in the USA. They range from the ones that will prick their arm with a needle, to the ones that swallow batteries and glass hoping to cut their stomach .

[This message has been edited by chopsticks (09-10-2008 10:14 AM).]

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