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Critical Analysis #2
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Combing
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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Combing |
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oceanvu2 Senior Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 1066Santa Monica, California, USA |
I used to grow geraniums, ten thousand at a time, and seed the clouds in kid-minds, And guide a raft down the Green River, And lay Chihuahua-foot tiles on concrete slabs. This was righteous work, good work, hard work that took me out of my mind. I’d come alive. Worthless, I’ve forgotten how to be. I’ve stopped doing. I’m watching you die. I used to fix things, but I can’t fix you. My garage is filled with useless tools, The living room with worthless pills. Let me be right-minded. Let me comb your hair. |
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| © Copyright 2007 Jim Aitken - All Rights Reserved | |||
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Absolutely moving. I send you and her both, the most extreme condolences I can muster. Excellent work Jimbo, as always. I like this one more than any other you've written. |
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Brad Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705Jejudo, South Korea |
I found the shift at Worthless a bit jarring. Was that intended? |
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oceanvu2 Senior Member
since 2007-02-24
Posts 1066Santa Monica, California, USA |
Hi Paul -- Thank you! Hi Brad -- The shift wasn't meant to jar, but it is a point where a shift occurs. Will work with your comment. Best, Jim |
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