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(revisement of the legends that did exist)Legend
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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(revisement of the legends that did exist)Legend |
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
This is a rewrite of legends that did exist now Legend. The other one can stand on its own as a different poem or this can be considered it. I like both but want to improve. So crittique away In days that long ago faded within the present times, The warrior women carried a legacy about as believable as a dream. An empire was built upon steady blades and ancient lines. We will remember the battle fury and courage of our perished mothers we have seen A people that rode to battle as one with their sister horse. Arrows that flew straight to the hearts of the challengers in their defeat. Symbolic blue and battle red merged together in remorse. Chanting prayers to the goddess of the hunt echoes in the battle heat. A thousand daughters rise up willing to die in memory of their fallen matriarchs. Descendants of one heritage ride in to battle galloping into the ranks of men. Parting the Red sea the painted queen cuts down Greek heroes with her sword of radiant stars. Blade in all his shimmering radiance protects his mistress from deathblows, he has to win. No man can conquer the savage warrior women of the east. Their generations carry on through their desire to be the winners of any conquest. We prove to the world that we are united and will never cease. The time of our mothers sparked legends, now it’s our turn to rule from the north to the fierce west. |
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