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Dextromethorphan.
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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Dextromethorphan. |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. 
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The night flies out Of the dilated pupils induced Through a coughless body Medicated by enough Nyquil For at least ten men. Light headed, Reminds me of a moment with you Where I released something That has never let out Inside anyone else. My Head’s falling off These frail shoulders Maybe there was something missing From around his waist Maybe there’s something missing From the inside of my skull. (Any better title ideas?) |
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| © Copyright 2007 Paul Weisbrod - All Rights Reserved | |||
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Nothing? |
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TyroStar Junior Member
since 2007-01-31
Posts 38 |
The subject gets a tad confusing. The first stanza, it's just a body. Then somewhere near the end it talks of another man, but also of the writer. I also don't like the way "My head is falling off" sounds. It sounds very.. bland. Try to spice that idea up a bit.. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I didn't find this confusing at all. The abuse of opiates and opiate-like drugs is akin to the desire to seek atonement. Either back to the womb, or on to the death.... I loved this verse particularly: "Maybe there was something missing From around his waist Maybe there’s something missing" As this is what gave me my "connection" to that--in scripture and as described by Josephus, procedure for the priests of the temple would be that they enter into study, sometimes for years, and rigorous cleansing ritual before they could enter the Holy of Holies, the Ark of The Covenant. A rope was placed arount the waist of the priest, because if one impure thought entered the mind to contaminate the Ark, the priest would be struck dead. The rope was needed to pull his body out, lest those who went in for rescue also be vaporized by thier impurity.  Nicely done. |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Thank you both. Anyone else? Valedictions, -Paul |
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viking_metal Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337In a Jeep, Minnesota. |
Thanks! |
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