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Critical Analysis #2
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The possibility of me
| Critical Analysis #2 |
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The possibility of me |
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pen&paper Senior Member
since 2006-06-06
Posts 513
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You don’t see it But I do The way you look at her The way you talk to her Always with a smile You have no idea But I do You like her You want her I can see it now Is there any hope for me? Is there any way that you could see? The way I look at you The way I talk to you Always with a smile? You have eyes for only her. Too bad you eyes can’t see What lies right in front of you The possibility of me |
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| © Copyright 2006 Cierra L. Robbeloth - All Rights Reserved | |||
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kif kif Member
since 2006-06-01
Posts 439BCN |
...and what would be the possibility of you? This shows nothing about you, apart from the pathos of yearning. At the moment, all I can hear is "ee ee ee ee", and "oo oo oo oo". Send this to your heart throb, (if you're brave enough-if it was mine, I'd do a re-write) but please, this is not a poem to be critiqued. there's nothing for the outside reader to picture. [This message has been edited by kif kif (08-08-2006 06:41 PM).] |
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David D Jerald Member
since 2006-08-07
Posts 74Tucson, Arizona |
Dear Pen and Paper. There is someone for you somewhere out there. Don't wear your self out on another human who isn't interested. of course that is if you wrote this poem because someone you like doesn't pay attention to you. Well then I say go write a poem about the ocean or something it will make you feel bettter in side. You did ok though keep at it never give up..... on your writing. Dave Dave |
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pen&paper Senior Member
since 2006-06-06
Posts 513 |
I'll never give up...on him or my writing. I think I love him... |
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