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Critical Analysis #2

Writers Prayer

EcanusVotum
New Member

since 2006-06-24

Posts 1

0 posted 2006-06-24 08:48 PM

Give me the key to the scape
if only to bottle the air for ink.
Grant me only you sovereignty
and deny my heart reverence.
Take away self induced spasms
from self concocted disavowal.
Turn this feather to sandalwood
cover the scent of past alliances.
Drain the shallow pond of reluctance
and let me sleep in the bed of soil.

kif kif
Member

since 2006-06-01

Posts 439
BCN

1 posted 2006-06-25 05:59 PM

"cover the scent of past alliancies" is another way to describe palimpsest. Who is this about, a writer or an editor?

"grant me only you soverignity" is grammatically confusing.

That said, I enjoyed your last line "let me sleep in a bed of soil"

Good idea, but badly executed.

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