Always There (A Modern Sonnet)

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Critical Analysis #2

Always There (A Modern Sonnet)

warmhrt
Senior Member

since 1999-12-18

Posts 1563

0 posted 2006-03-20 08:42 PM

Revising......
"It is wisdom to know others;
It is enlightenment to know one's self" - Lao Tzu

[This message has been edited by warmhrt (03-21-2006 07:59 PM).]

Not A Poet
Member Elite

since 1999-11-03

Posts 3885
Oklahoma, USA

1 posted 2006-03-21 10:23 AM

Hi Kris. Good to hear from you again. Good too to see you still writing an occasional sonnet

This one has a rather simple choice of rhymes but they work well enough. We don't always have to strive for unexpected or difficult words. The emotion comes through quite well. You have at least a little enjambment to break up the trite regularity that can spoil the effect of many sonnets. Overall, it was a quite enjoyable read.

Of course, this is CA so there should be some nits, right? Well, the meter is just a little bumpy. Maybe that's why you called it a "modern sonnet?" By that I mean, every line can be read as iambic pentameter but in some cases it does take a bit of a stretch to do so. If read aloud in strict IP, you would find that it sounds a bit off or "funny" to the ear.

Thanks,
Pete

warmhrt
Senior Member

since 1999-12-18

Posts 1563

2 posted 2006-03-22 01:51 PM

Hey Pete, how are you? Nice to hear from you. I don't know if you noticed, but I am revising this sonnet, as I, too, felt it was too simplistic, and, as you said, a "little bumpy" in some spots. Thanks for your input...always appreciated.

Kris

"It is wisdom to know others;
It is enlightenment to know one's self" - Lao Tzu

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