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Critical Analysis #2
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netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami

0 posted 2005-04-02 01:58 AM


trial balloon.

Admin may consider -where- or -if- this thread belongs at PIP


A "t'erse" is my short-form personal rhyme for Internet poets.  

Easy to make -fluff- which draws from the poet's screen name and -some element of perceived personality-.

Humor or gentle observation is the keyword.  Not mean. Not ugly,,, nothing worse than a gentle ribbing

The t'erse is -singable- to the tune of "It Ain't Gonna Rain No Mo' No Mo'"

-puns and word twists are free of charge
-the final line is italicized and is a summary

==


b costen I can't get his drift
and b costen I can't scan
the price of that is diffidence
abstraction's price? crits pan



(one moment, I'll fLetch some others)

[This message has been edited by netsky (04-02-2005 03:07 AM).]

© Copyright 2005 Reid Welch - All Rights Reserved
netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
1 posted 2005-04-02 02:05 AM


of -course-, these are for critical review.

Now... you must add in your own. You folks all know each other!  Make the gift of personal verse to your favorite characters.  


===

Not A Poet undercooks his name
basting evidence au jus.
net' dips him in a mild cheese sauce
rarebits of poe for us




netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
2 posted 2005-04-02 02:28 AM


netsky trusts the firemen's net;
he takes the leap on trust.
The firemen laugh and netsky lands
splat for peace he must

[This message has been edited by netsky (04-02-2005 04:46 AM).]

netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
3 posted 2005-04-02 02:34 AM



Enchantress charms net' just in time
wishing him a long, full life.
net' accepts in nick of rhyme
there's no hidden Passions knife


netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
4 posted 2005-04-02 02:37 AM


Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 51887
hearkening to a plains song


"so don't be a stranger"

===

Sunshine harkens up a warmth
not plains, but rich brilliance
Gold and Yellow, Young and Mellow
a lasting rememberance


netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
5 posted 2005-04-02 02:38 AM


Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 05-20-99
Posts 22104
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

=====


A man, a plan, now here comes Nan
granting easement for waterway.
Gracious She, she gives free land
Panama hats all tip today

netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
6 posted 2005-04-02 02:51 AM


Gentle Spirit
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 10-09-2000
Posts 9569
~Within A Dream ~ Lost In PA

"... I am pleased to make your acquaintance, and hope you enjoy your time here."

===


Gentle Spirit frees up souls
to glide freely, as like birds.
Time flies too, as does all life
fly safest nearest Gentle words



netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
7 posted 2005-04-02 03:02 AM


Martie
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 09-21-1999
Posts 21638
California


1 posted 03-29-2005 09:03 PM        
'...I look forward to more of your poetry.'

===



Martie shimmers lovely guise
(please peek at her profile)
Showering petals in net's new path
rare rose; she scents my wiles



[This message has been edited by netsky (04-02-2005 03:33 AM).]

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
8 posted 2005-04-02 07:48 AM


love them...especially Martie's
*s
M

netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
9 posted 2005-04-02 01:18 PM


thanks.
frankly speaking: all are rough hewn things.  
the female t'erses are my faves because females allow me to gush and mush.  Note that guys' t'erses go in another direction as a rule.

Martie's is almost -confessional- because she sees/you see that I admit that -she- (and all women) can spot buttery flattery from a mile away. Still, they like that... if it's sincere.

which I am!

But the guys?  Are reserved and leery of this quirky, Puckish fellow making.. what? What the heck is this all about?

-fun and attention for all Internet poets-

personal verse is nourishing to giver and receiver alike.

cheers, you're -next-

ha ha

netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
10 posted 2005-04-02 01:24 PM



nakdthoughts thinks fine and free
between velvet sheets of thoughts.
What is the price of her love gained?
some things cannot be bought

[This message has been edited by netsky (04-02-2005 02:01 PM).]

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
11 posted 2005-04-02 03:42 PM


some things cannot be bought...


so very true ~~~

smiling thanks
M

netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
12 posted 2005-04-04 10:07 PM


Nightshade
Status: Member Patricius
Date Registered: 08-31-2001
Last Post: 04-04-2005  
Total Posts: 11341
Originating Posts: 319  
Current Email: Send Email to Nightshade
Homepage:  http://www.darcejean.com/friends/our_garden.html
Occupation: daydream believer
Location: just out of reach
Interests: Reading. Writing. Garden meditation. Fairies & Angels.

====

Nightshade plays me in soft light
Shading, tuneful, music deft
Fairy & Angel make a duet:

Contrapunctual A to melody in F

[This message has been edited by netsky (04-05-2005 08:06 PM).]

netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
13 posted 2005-04-05 04:17 PM


Brad (Moderator)

Status: Member Elite
Date Registered: 08-20-99
Last Post: 04-05-2005  
Total Posts: 3988
Originating Posts: 233  
Current Email: Send Email to Brad
Homepage:
Occupation: Visiting Professor
Location: Seoul, Korea
Interests: poetry, writing, thinking, talking
ICQ Number:
Staff Desc:   
Passions ID:   
Defaults: Icon: 01 Font: Arial
Encourage Critiques: Yes
Critique Message: I just realized this wasn't turned on. There has to be an irony there somewhere.

=====


Brad thinks sharper than a tack;
he drives a wry point in.
We sense best by hammer taps
irony not missed by him

netsky
Member
since 2005-03-29
Posts 148
Miami
14 posted 2005-04-05 07:21 PM


Sadelite
Member Elite
since 10-11-2003
Posts 2483


1 posted 04-05-2005 07:06 PM    as cute as a button and as true as blue!...Incidently, welcome to Passions!

     sadie

=====


sadie alights upon my skin
fanning irridescent color
sharing sight exemplary
sadielite soon on another



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