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jaxjoy
Member

since 1999-12-14

Posts 112
Texas

0 posted 2004-12-01 01:01 AM

Faith

I spent all this time
expecting God to send an angel to me.
Turns out,
they're not all they're cracked up to be.

Fall away from myself,
the dream I've longed to see.
I waited for your arms to reach,
to hear your sweet decree.

For one moment I held your hand in mine
Your palm the lock,
my fingers, keys.

My eyes opened,
fists clenched
to dull my pain.
Your eyes closed,
blind to all I see.

My heart, it sighs in disbelief
Where have you gone
and can you feel this grief?
Is there nothing more I can do
than to accept this loss
and anticipate grievous sorrow to ensue.

Why do I keep reaching out
only to hear that your heart
can never be devout?

My faith gave me belief
in what I could not see.
Your love, I felt gave me purpose to be.
Never had I been so complete
as when in your arms, you'd comfort me.

I look upwards
and pray God explain
how could this happen,
how could I love in vain?

I never wanted to see the day
that this desire left my soul.
When no longer could I this game play.
My hope has finally turned to despair.
I sit alone and break.
I've even lost my faith in prayer.
I feel God has grown weary of my tears,
perhaps because I've failed him,
disappointed him throughout my years.

Obliviously pursued this one love
I thought to be true.
When all along it should have been you.
I don't know if even you can this broken soul mend.
Never again will I recognize an angel you send.

The space within my chest, bare
Unable to love
No longer can I care.
I've lost my faith
I've been defeated.
And with my last breath I'll say,
He was all I ever needed.

~DreamChild~
Senior Member

since 2001-04-23

Posts 544
in your dreams

1 posted 2004-12-09 12:47 PM

i don't think poems should be this long.
keep it simple, that's more fun. lol

it read well, though.

epoet
Member

since 2000-05-11

Posts 291
grand rapid,MI, usa

2 posted 2004-12-13 09:18 AM

Interesting read. A few suggestions. First, the flow is a little hampered by the difference in length variation in the stanzas. Try staying with a set number of lines in each stanza. The ending is written well and the realization of the fact that we all need God would hit home harder if it was set apart somehow. No idea on exactly how. Will have to look at again.

P. J. Kotrch
carpe diem
A soul once touched is a soul once blessed by love

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