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Critical Analysis #2
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wings of the moon
Member
since 2003-03-27
Posts 323
Pink bubblegum land

0 posted 2004-04-17 03:56 PM


“Damn, tread on the blue again!”
He cursed as the thread, wound around his leg,
and tangled a bangle of lace
that cut short his circulation.

A, B, smudged ink on his hands,
long lining the wrinkle so
“You shall spell right!”

He tripped.


----
help me find a title!
and also, please do criticize it, tear it apart, shread it to pieces, how else am i meant to progress?


"more than yesterday, less than tomorrow, i love you"

© Copyright 2004 Claire Lucille - All Rights Reserved
forne_marin
Member
since 2004-04-13
Posts 140
Spartanburg, South Carolina
1 posted 2004-04-18 02:40 PM


Um. I don't get it.
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