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Critical Analysis #2
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Ford
Junior Member
since 2003-05-11
Posts 12
Arkansaw

0 posted 2003-06-13 01:47 AM


An old man sips at his messianic gin,
While talking to a boy of just seventeen.
"Remember, you're a jack, and the world's a queen,
And with that m'boy, fill me up again.
The truth may be told, and beauty may be seen,
But the lives of most never quite begin.

"Yes, the stars were once sprinkled across my eyes,
But now they've slipped beneath a silhouette of pride,
And with them the life they used to provide.
Now all that's left is this excuse of a disguise,
Which conceals not what youth used to hide,
But only the morbid dreams that age supplies."

He set his glass down and began to chuckle aloud.
"To think, I was just like you: so sure and proud.
Stay that way, please, just like you are.
Just ask ol' Icarus, there's no glory in going too far.
So, here's some hoary advice, and nothing more:
Youth is the only thing worth living for."


© Copyright 2003 Ford - All Rights Reserved
idleeyes86
Member
since 2003-06-09
Posts 64
Somewhere over the rainbow
1 posted 2003-06-13 09:41 AM


The only word I could think for this was sophisticated. The language although not highly complex, shows a variety of vocabulary, there are references to greek mythology (or roman I can never remember which myths come from where), there are elements of imagery, and the rhyme scheme is one that, although quite often used by well known poets (Larkin came to mind for me) is not exactly common on internet forums. However I it is pointless pointing out all the little technicalities because that is not why we read poetry. It flowed nicely and was certainly made me smile. As a youngster with strs sprinkled across my eyes myself I easily placed myself in the shoes of the youngster and, probably like the young lad in the poem, will probably forget the wise words that are spoken by tommorrow.

Everybody hurts, take comfort in your friends, cos everybody hurts sometimes

(r.e.m)

Ford
Junior Member
since 2003-05-11
Posts 12
Arkansaw
2 posted 2003-06-21 03:32 PM


Thank you for your kind response. I'm glad that it brought a smile to your face.

Take care.

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