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brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland

0 posted 2000-07-16 12:36 PM


Under blessed twilight we were born
Destined to be lovers in the shadows
Of alleys away from the elder's scorn
We were wild creatures dancing in eternal sorrows
Drown with our passions burning and hearts torn.

A brilliance raged across the still secret night
Hands clutching flesh teeth sinking in sweet fruit
We burned candles, embers cast across dawn's first light
To bloom in stolen truth, as stars of eternal youth
Aligning in our paradise our burdened love took flight.

We were forbidden love under their protection
To be separated at all cost, volatile desire
Colliding in a vacuum exploding without direction
Away from stern gaze our skin soared on fire
Weeping our jewels baptised in a sea of affection.

Sorrow seared as terror erupted upon frozen sky
Elders descended ravens ravaging our bliss
We were slain, our hearts trembling to a sigh
We sealed our salvation from stone in our final kiss
Stars have their moment and then they die.  



"Out of sorrow entire worlds have been built
Out of longing great wonders have been willed
They're only little tears, darling, let them spill" Nick

© Copyright 2000 brian madden - All Rights Reserved
ma miller
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 806

1 posted 2000-07-16 12:58 PM


very sensual and a great use of the "challenge" verse ... nice (very) nice ... bravo ... your working is inspiring ...

[This message has been edited by MA Miller (edited 07-16-2000).]

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2000-07-16 02:03 PM


We were forbidden love under their protection
To be separated at all cost, volatile desire
Colliding in a vacuum exploding without direction
Away from stern gaze our skin soared on fire
Weeping our jewels baptised in a sea of affection.

Sorrow seared as terror erupted upon frozen sky
Elders descended ravens ravaging our bliss
We were slain, our hearts trembling to a sigh
We sealed our salvation from stone in our final kiss
Stars have their moment and then they die.  
-------------------
hehe..I found you LOL
(paper work? what paper work)  
nice try Bri...lol
this was the first place I looked hehe
awesome poem my friend...very nice read
sensual and visually stunning...
reminds me of those cherubs we know and love LOL
very cool poem Bri-guy
later-starstruck-gator
eve  



There are places inside our souls -
that have never been touched.
There are places inside our hearts -
that need to be loved this much.
~jm~

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

3 posted 2000-07-16 04:05 PM


Your writing never ceases to amaze me, Brian! This is magnificent!  

Denise

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2000-07-16 05:10 PM


Brian, this is excellent!! I must say you met your own challenge nicely.  
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464
Somewhere near the Rainbow
5 posted 2000-07-16 08:15 PM


Brian, Once again your mind creates a masterpiece, and with your own challenge at that. Excellent job I love it.  
StarrGazer
Senior Member
since 2000-03-05
Posts 679
Texas
6 posted 2000-07-16 10:51 PM


*sighs* very nicely done  
midnightblues
Senior Member
since 2000-07-01
Posts 1597
Singapore
7 posted 2000-07-17 07:07 AM


Very romantic, brian! How I envy ur writing *S*

If there cannot be equal in affection, then let the one with more be me - midnightblues™

Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
8 posted 2000-07-17 01:44 PM


Very nice Brian!!!!!!! The way you use words is wonderful!!!
Bridgette  


"Somewhere, somehow, it should be possible to touch someone and never let go again. To hold someone, not for a moment but forever." Unknown

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
9 posted 2000-07-17 02:18 PM


Have to hand it to you brian...
you set high standards for yourself and then meet them perfectly... that is greatness in itself... and your poetry then remains as only another wonder ....

regards, sudhir

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
10 posted 2000-07-17 06:38 PM


Thanks to everyone for their very generous and wonderful comments and continued support.
I am blushing from all your beautiful words, thanks. : )


"Out of sorrow entire worlds have been built
Out of longing great wonders have been willed
They're only little tears, darling, let them spill" Nick

Lady Lost
Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 470

11 posted 2000-07-18 08:34 AM


What a wonderful tale you tell..The desires of young lovers..indulging in passionate moments..struggling with a generation of people who say that what they do is of evil nature...

Beautifully written, this poem really got a hold of my heart...

You can never have too much fiction; reality can be such a bore

dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
12 posted 2000-08-04 05:54 PM



*shiver*    *sigh*...
how i'd love to watch your dreams happen...

dg

"Half of what i say is meaningless; but i say it so that the other half may reach you."
-Kahlil Gibran


poutprincess
Senior Member
since 2000-07-06
Posts 735
Perth, Western Australia, Australia
13 posted 2000-08-04 06:30 PM


"to bloom in stolen truth,as stars of eternal youth
Aligning in our paradise our burdened love took flight"

"We sealed our salvation from stone in our final kiss
Stars have their moment then die"

ah this is beautiful....we all get that special moment in time..and we die...but somehow that one moment, that surreal memory...lasts throughout eternity...through words like these...and souls.
(ah, just me rambling...trying to make sense of my thoughts)

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