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Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania

0 posted 2000-06-17 08:37 AM


BUY ONE - GET ONE FREE

You get TWO for the price of ONE!  Can it be?
I’m just buying ONE and then getting one FREE?

“I’ll take two of those please”, I said to the clerk.
“Then that’s four to be bagged”, she said with  a smirk"

“No, No, I want TWO, One is paid, One is free”
“ Then your not getting TWO, as you stated to me
Your just getting ONE, and the other one’s free
  You should have said ONE and not TWO, don’t you see”

“All right, it is ONE then, but please bag me TWO
ONE is on me and the other’s on you”
She laughed as she bagged them all shiny and new
“ Nothing is free, dear, you’re paying for TWO”

“Paying for, TWO? I’m just paying for mine
The second is free like it says on the sign”

“You’re paying for both, dear, it’s as clear as the day
For the first one is worth only half what you paid
So your getting the two and your paying their worth
It’s the greatest marketing tool here on earth
Not only are you paying the regular price
You’re paying it ONCE and you’re paying it TWICE!
The free one’s  not free, dear, you’re just buying TWO
For the price of just ONE, but the joke is on you”

“Now let me see if this makes any sense
I paid a whole buck but it’s worth  fifty cents
But since I have two, their value ‘s a buck
But by my calculations, I think I’m in luck

Since there only worth half , I was gypped out of TWO
So you owe me TWO more, then I’m even with you
So I emptied the TWO on the counter once more
I said, clerk, would you please reimburse me for FOUR
Since the sign says a buck for each one on the rack
I’m giving you FOUR and get FOUR dollars back”

She reluctantly gave me four bucks from the drawer
And was scratching her head as I walked out the door
She reached in and pulled out a pencil and pad
As she quietly whispered, “ I think I’ve been had”

Elizabeth Santos

© Copyright 2000 Elizabeth Santos - All Rights Reserved
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464
Somewhere near the Rainbow
1 posted 2000-06-17 08:51 AM


LOL, Elizabeth this is excellent, I love it.  
brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
2 posted 2000-06-17 08:58 AM


LOL Elizabeth. A smart woman. one thing I can never do is work out maths in my head, I just can't do it. excellent poem. < !signature-->

------------------------
"Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time".

Baltimore Grotto

"To be nobody-but-yourself-in a world which is doing its best night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting."

E.E Cummings.

"Art is a lie which makes us realise the truth." Pablo Picasso

"We Irish are too poetical to be poets, we are a nation of brilliant failures" Oscar Wilde


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[This message has been edited by brian madden (edited 06-18-2000).]

kelieth
Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 314
Normal IL - USA
3 posted 2000-06-17 11:10 AM


LOL Great job.  

Kevin

"Anything is possible with patience, time is the tool use it to reach your goals."

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2000-06-17 02:03 PM


This is great!!! A Riddle and a Rhyme both at the same time!    
Romy
Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170
Plantation, Florida
5 posted 2000-06-17 03:00 PM


I loved this! How funny! I've bought into the "buy one, get one free" promotions many times but now I'll try to do the math first!

dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
6 posted 2000-06-17 04:26 PM


heehee!  

elizabeth, this is so funny--and how true it is!  

it sounds like a dr seuss tale!!

what a great little book this would make  

dg


"A Poet's life is on written page; a scenario to take the stage--watch..." dgvarner

BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919
New York, USA
7 posted 2000-06-17 05:20 PM


Loved this one Elizabeth - Seems more than once I've been in a predicatment like that.  Guess I'll need to take my calculator next time...maybe I can finally end up ahead of the game..... Bonnie
Yu Lan
Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462
New Zealand
8 posted 2000-06-17 08:33 PM


I love this poem!!! ^_^ This is soo great!! ^_^ hehe, serves her, right, huh? Thinking she can outsmart you.. *_^

brilliant..

Lynne

deleeme
Senior Member
since 1999-10-09
Posts 1766
NEW ENGLAND, USA
9 posted 2000-06-17 10:36 PM


Liz,
You never cease to amaze me- your poetry- your logic--your humor all right on target!BULL's EYE!   David


"GOD GIVES- but man must open his hand." (German Proverb)


Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
10 posted 2000-06-17 11:26 PM



LMAO!  Liz, you go girl!  I only wish that I could do that in real life    This is just an awesome poem, you never cease to amaze me with your talent, witty at that!

Take care,
Melissa Honeybee

Swåmp¤Faerÿie
Member
since 2000-03-29
Posts 358
Illinois
11 posted 2000-06-18 08:52 AM


This is excellent!! i love it!! it's very clear all the way through,you don't really have to guess what's going on.....GREAT WORK!! i enjoyed this so much ,it was hilarious!!

swamp


And there she weaves by night and day,
a magic web of colours gay.~Tennyson

Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
12 posted 2000-06-18 09:02 AM


ROFL ! You really have a way with words Liz ! Loved it !
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
13 posted 2000-06-18 07:47 PM


Has this ever happened to your?
Half off (of what? Your super inflated "regular" price.?) Don't fall for it'
Thankd all for commenting on this poem,I enjoyed your responses
Love
Liz

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
14 posted 2000-06-18 10:46 PM


Ha!       I loved this.  It may sound so often like a good deal but is it really?  

Joy

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