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Romy
Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170
Plantation, Florida

0 posted 2000-06-09 08:56 PM


Three Little Girls
sitting on the edge of the old wooden porch,
swinging their sunburned legs
back and forth,
back and forth.
Whispering to each other through cupped hands,  
the secrets
that little girls treasure.
And I,
the intruder, peer unseen from
behind the dusty window
of the general store.
Cradling my bag of groceries close to my chest,
as if it were the carefree and innocent spirit
of my youthful days,
reborn.
I  yearn to join their magic circle,
Giggling and chattering,  
in a long-forgotten language
that only a child can understand.
To revisit, if only for a moment,
that enchanting world
of green grass and blue skies,
jump ropes and ice cream cones.
Where palaces are filled with unbroken dreams
and the sweet promise of all
that is beautiful and fair
is waiting
to be discovered.



© Copyright 2000 Deborah L. Carter - All Rights Reserved
Songbird
Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184
Missouri
1 posted 2000-06-09 09:40 PM


You paint such a lovely picture, I really felt as I too was evesdropping on the childhood scene. This needs to be hung on the wall. It is excellent, I could read it over and over again.
Esmeralda Ponsonby
Member
since 2000-04-02
Posts 138

2 posted 2000-06-09 10:18 PM


Wow, what a sweet and innocent poem, don't we all wish at times we could see through the eyes of children. Excellent poem, I enjoyed.
dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
3 posted 2000-06-09 11:58 PM


ah yes..to be young and carefree...to giggle..to whisper..isnt it fun to watch now..

  

thanks for guiding us back to the fun!..  

dg
< !signature-->

 "A Poet's life is on written page; a scenario to take the stage--watch..."  dgvarner

[This message has been edited by dgvarner (edited 06-10-2000).]

Yu Lan
Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462
New Zealand
4 posted 2000-06-10 01:42 AM


Aah, this is such a sweet poem! The flow is a little interupted in places here, but the words.. are just fabulous. ^_^

lovely..
Lynne

Alle'cram
Senior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 1816
Texas
5 posted 2000-06-10 02:47 AM


Debbie, Thanks for this one. Not only was I carried away with your vision, I had a few flashbacks of my own. So cheerful and carefree. A excellent job penning this scene.
Jon Mewett
Senior Member
since 2000-03-04
Posts 1304

6 posted 2000-06-10 03:40 AM


Debbie

A very fine piece of cildhood.

Lovingly observed and well written.



jon

Romy
Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170
Plantation, Florida
7 posted 2000-06-10 09:16 AM


Thanks everybody!  I'm so glad you liked it!

It's so easy to get caught up in the "adult world" and forget the simple moments of childhood that seemed almost magical!

Yu Lan, I agree with you, some of the flow in my poem seems interupted a bit.  I wonder if I should take it over to the critical analysis forum for some advice?

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
8 posted 2000-06-10 12:09 PM


Oh yes, I definetly enjoyed this.  You painted a picture in my mind alright.  I could see them perfectly perched holding ice cream cones dripping down their hands, laughing..and you standing from behind like looking back almost on you as a child.  Great job again!

Joy

kelieth
Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 314
Normal IL - USA
9 posted 2000-06-13 12:13 PM


Debbie,
     It's a great scene to see the innocence and blessing in childhood.  Blessings I've missed.  Yet through poems such as these I feel what I've lost.  Thank you.  

 Kevin

"Anything is possible with patience, time is the tool use it to reach your goals."

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

10 posted 2000-06-14 09:39 PM


This is absolutely wonderful, Debbie! It reminded me of my two sisters and me and also of a picture that I have of three little girls (who just happen to resemble the three of us) sitting on a rock overlooking the ocean. Brings back memories of some wonderful times, as your poem did!

Denise

StarrGazer
Senior Member
since 2000-03-05
Posts 679
Texas
11 posted 2000-06-14 10:11 PM


fantastic !! such imagery good job  
deleeme
Senior Member
since 1999-10-09
Posts 1766
NEW ENGLAND, USA
12 posted 2000-06-14 10:39 PM


Debbie,
This was a delightful nostalgic look- which conjures up such scenes of innocent pleasures which now for us adults seem so far away and unattainanle--thanks for the easedropping fun you here share with us, David

Romy
Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170
Plantation, Florida
13 posted 2000-06-14 11:51 PM


Thank you all, for your kind comments and I'm so glad that it brought back some of your own fond memories!
Debbie

PhaerieChild
Senior Member
since 1999-08-30
Posts 1787
Aloha, Oregon
14 posted 2000-06-14 11:52 PM


Debbie...thanks so much for memories of so long ago, and the memories that will be made as my granddaughters grow.

 Poetry~ Words falling on paper, painting a dream.

Shawna R. Holder
Boise, Idaho



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