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Just throwing this out there to see what you think
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Just throwing this out there to see what you think |
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Wobbly Head Bob Member
since 2000-05-15
Posts 299Virginia, USA |
On a greener tree the sky would fall When living life is what means it all I chase the wind down fluttered by Carress the soul with cluttered sigh In a deeper sea the bubbles burst Surround and compound this is the worst Parellels squeeze Carousels freeze No more sea breeze, or birds an bees The higher up the deeper gate Transcend or descend our mortal fate Does it matter to me No, I can't see I'm a soul to be, just air are we Drift upon the airless light creep into the forever night I wish I may, wish I might Have no eyes to see the sight On a greyer plain oh we would smile Sit with fairies and laugh a while Its over and done We've lost the sun All to none, the only one |
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| © Copyright 2000 Wobbly Head Bob - All Rights Reserved | |||
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
WHB, I enjoyed the read, though it emanated sadness and a loss of hope, IMHO. We all write darker pieces though...I have many times. I think it's called "writing therapy". Good work, Kris the poet's pen...gives to airy nothing A local habitation and a name ~ Shakespeare |
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childomine Senior Member
since 2000-01-25
Posts 818st. petersburg, FL |
I read it twice because I wasn't so sure that I read saddness in it. After the second read I'm still not sure I read saddness.  Different experiences - yes. Saddness - ?? I actually enjoyed this so maybe I've miss interpreted the whole thing. |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
Personally - I really enjoyed this - it has an excellent feel to it - very solid work. We've lost the sun...yes, I sure know how that feels! K |
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Yu Lan Senior Member
since 2000-04-13
Posts 1462New Zealand |
beautiful, W.H.B.. just beautiful.. Lynne |
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Swåmp¤Faerÿie Member
since 2000-03-29
Posts 358Illinois |
Bob this is just breathtaking...i think this is a real awesome poem. Not sure what the explanation is but it's a great read anyhow!!!!! swampius maximus And there she weaves by night and day, a magic web of colours gay.~Tennyson |
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dgvarner Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552High Springs, Florida |
well boy...i dont know.....i read it once and thought it was cool...i read it twice and it gave me chills...I LOVE IT!! really do...do you have a certain somthing that it means? i ask because i've actually written stuff that even I couldnt explain! sometimes the unexplainable is the most awsome work abstract--painters do it..so can we!dgvarner |
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ellie LeJeune Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156King of Prussia, PA USA |
Bob; I loved the rhythm and flow of this one. "sit with fairies and laugh a while". I just love that line...so whimsical. Great job. Ellie 02 |
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Wobbly Head Bob Member
since 2000-05-15
Posts 299Virginia, USA |
Wow, thank you everyone! I'm overwhelmed with all the responces! To clarify a point here I must say that this poems inner meaning eludes even me. I do, however, know that this poem is about beauty and how temporary that is. But the beauty here in this work is the world we live on, and I don't know how much longer the splendor of our dying planet will last. Thanks again all!!! |
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