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Passions in Poetry

who watches the watcher?

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Tramp Poet
Senior Member
since 01-06-2000
Posts 786
Could Be Anywhere...


0 posted 05-15-2000 10:20 AM       View Profile for Tramp Poet   Email Tramp Poet   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Tramp Poet's Home Page   View IP for Tramp Poet

the Watcher

Sitting in darkest corner
watching, ever watching
his stubby pencil in hand.
The dance swirling on
as the ritual winds down
damn closing, getting closer.

Trembling hands lift elixir
with smoke yellowed fingers
insight hurriedly scribbled.
Couples laughingly tease
as the desperate pair off
leaving the few, and the watcher.

Watching eye sharp and clear
his mind clouded with life
recording, reporting the moment.
Liquid antidote helps
dilute, weaken the past
watching for a distant tomorrow.

Gently booted from perch
watcher stumbles tword home
pausing to scribble anew.
Laughing under pale moonlight
as irony sinks in even deeper
nothing to watch now, ‘cept the watcher.

~~~~~~~~~~~
Seems i'm stuck in this format for awhile-
this will likely pass. In this same vein,
probably reported by the Watcher...i have a
piece that is scathing and spitefull called
theWhore. If y'all want to see it, just ask.



  bleeding...

"Tis ink coming from his arm,
Captain!"

© Copyright 2000 Daniel James Burt - All Rights Reserved
Wobbly Head Bob
Member
since 05-15-2000
Posts 309
Virginia, USA


1 posted 05-15-2000 11:41 AM       View Profile for Wobbly Head Bob   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Wobbly Head Bob

I think I know what its like to be the "watcher" that was the subject of this piece.  Sitting, and watching as people dance and laugh and do what they will, passed on and passed on until its time to go, alone, and watched.  I liked this one, *lol* with the exception of smoking and drinking kind of reminded me of middle-school dances...*shudder*...what memories!  Thank you much!
Alle'cram
Senior Member
since 02-28-2000
Posts 1827
Texas


2 posted 05-15-2000 12:20 PM       View Profile for Alle'cram   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alle'cram

B, Deep with moving emotions and expressed well. Like the concept. The last verse, is the Watcher moving on toward expressions of self to examine? Great job, made me think. Nicely written. mm
PhaerieChild
Senior Member
since 08-30-99
Posts 1829
Aloha, Oregon


3 posted 05-15-2000 03:17 PM       View Profile for PhaerieChild   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PhaerieChild

Hey Bro...I really like this format. Seems to fit the mood as of late. I remember well being the 'watcher' as well and this sure put it in a nice neat package. Your writing has matured and gotten so intense lately and I must say it suits you well. Love you...Sis

 Poetry~ Words falling on paper, painting a dream.

Shawna R. Holder
Boise, Idaho


Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


4 posted 05-15-2000 03:44 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

I love this Daniel! I guess you could say all we poets are 'watchers'! I, too, love this style, stay stuck there for as long as you like! As for your other piece, as long as it contains nothing 'explicitly' Adult in nature, please feel free to post it here. Otherwise you can feel free to post it in Adult! If you aren't sure, feel free to email me a copy and I will let you know where it is best suited! Are you feeling free enough yet?......hehehehehe

Denise



[This message has been edited by dsnyder (edited 05-15-2000).]
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 08-26-99
Posts 46297
displaced


5 posted 12-25-2004 10:44 AM       View Profile for passing shadows   Email passing shadows   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for passing shadows

I'm a watcher, so this really hit home
 
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