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Gene
Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935
Colorado, USA

0 posted 2000-04-21 03:51 PM



As swirling patterns of life’s emotion
Drift upon this endless ocean,
A peaceful calm comes over me,
But things appear that could not possibly.
This incredible calm...this complete tranquility;
     Am I dreaming or have I died.  
          
The taste of your lips; the sight of your face;
How easily eternity is embraced.
How beautiful the colors on the water dance;
The smell of roses and sweet romance.
My senses thrive beyond enhanced.
     I have never felt so alive.

______

In response to Lost Dreamer's challenge, I could only post an excerpt from a poem which got banned from Passions, so I hope it made sense.
______

~Gene



[This message has been edited by u_gene (edited 04-23-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 Gene M. - All Rights Reserved
Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464
Somewhere near the Rainbow
1 posted 2000-04-21 04:50 PM


Gene, This is excellent, the rest must have been quite interesting to get it banned...LOL
You obviously did not try the adult forum with it, I don't think anything gets banned from there. Anyway this was fine for the challenge, actually it was perfect and now our imaginations can just wander.  

Thanks for responding to this challenge, I was trying to lift the spirits from the other challenge being tossed around.  

Gene
Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935
Colorado, USA
2 posted 2000-04-21 05:09 PM


Gloria -- Thanks, I tried to make it work for your challenge. It turns out, it's not a bad little poem in its own right. The full version would have gotten banned, even in the Adult Forum, cuz it was very graphically discriptive about the taboo subject here.

~Gene

Lost Dreamer
Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464
Somewhere near the Rainbow
3 posted 2000-04-21 05:23 PM


Gene, Yes this poem is good in it's own right  

My mind must have been on the wrong track then, I can't imagine a poem this magnificent going that bad.

PrincessPoet
Member
since 2000-04-15
Posts 133
Long Beach, Calif.
4 posted 2000-04-21 09:12 PM



U_Gene Hi!
How can such A Beautiful Beginning end up on the wrong path?
I like the poem it seems to embark on the rollercoaster ride our emotions sometimes take.


 Your failures in life come from not realizing your nearness to success when you give up.
-Yoruba Proverb

Poetry & Friendship,
PrincessPoet


Gene
Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935
Colorado, USA
5 posted 2000-04-22 05:54 PM


Princess,

Thanks for the compliment. It was originally a love/death poem. It was simply about a man who couldn't stand to live without his wife. Some people found my depiction very disturbing. I found it no different than Romeo & Juliet.

~Gene

twinsgd
Member
since 2000-02-13
Posts 416
Ontario,Canada
6 posted 2000-04-23 05:04 AM


Standing alone Gene these two verses are great
I remembered the discussion over the original posting, then your lead-in comment for me set up a totally chilling read ending in the last line " I never felt so alive". Although I never read the original knowing where it went really influenced how this one felt.
Wish you had put the lead -in at the end.
Maybe I just get too caught up in some of this stuff.

Jack

Gene
Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935
Colorado, USA
7 posted 2000-04-23 04:06 PM


What'chya talk'n 'bout, Jack?  Take another look.  
Pepper
Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079
Southern Florida
8 posted 2000-04-24 08:17 AM


This is lovely, Gene ....
Curiosity now piqued .. I would have loved to read this piece in its entirety .....

kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
9 posted 2000-05-01 08:05 PM


yes,i think this poem is terrific in its own right...but then aren't all your poems so?hmmmm....lovely poem again,u_gene....like the others, i will love to read the whole poem....perhaps you can e-mail it to me...
INclan
Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024
Indiana, USA
10 posted 2000-05-02 11:14 AM


Well done U_Gene!
Gene
Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935
Colorado, USA
11 posted 2000-05-02 02:50 PM


Pepper -- Kaile -- INclan --

Thanks, glad you liked it. I'll e-mail the complete poem to you, kaile.
Anyone else who is interested, please e-mail me to request it.

~Gene

childomine
Senior Member
since 2000-01-25
Posts 818
st. petersburg, FL
12 posted 2000-05-02 05:47 PM


I can't imagine the rest of the poem considering how excellent a portion of it is.  Good work Gene (& I will be requesting to see the rest)
Jon Mewett
Senior Member
since 2000-03-04
Posts 1304

13 posted 2000-05-03 07:06 AM


You've set the scene so well Gene...you'd better email me the rest .......PLEASE

Jon

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