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Fallen Angel
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Fallen Angel |
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Wikket Member
since 2000-01-29
Posts 340Santa Clara, CA USA 
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An Angel spiraling down Fire licking his heels Shuddering at the sound I open my eyes and scream Take me away my friend My eyes have gone black I cannot see anything Anything real to me Horses and chariots follow The Angel awaiting oblivion I can feel the pain and sorrow His heart bleeds my song Take me away my friend My mind has gone black I cannot ponder anything Anything real to me A moment of time escapes His silouette above me Fear glistening on his face Eternal agony seconds away Take me away my friend My heart has gone black I cannot feel anything Anything real to me The caverns below beckon His time slows like smoke Slowly drifting from my cigarrette Into the light above Take me away sweet friend My soul has gone black I cannot understand anything Anything real to me In an instant it ends I drift back into reality Questioning almost everything Fearing the breathing me by, Jamie Hartman 2000 --Kind of personal, this one is to me. If you don't get it I don't blame you, sometimes my mind is a little off kilter from the rest of the World. That's okay, gives me character!!!   --Jamie |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jamie Carlson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Interesting, Jamie, and well written! Denise |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
well i like the way your little off kilter mind works ...very deep poem jamie girl..i really got into it...you should join me over in the "dark" with this one...its perfect...The caverns below beckon His time slows like smoke Slowly drifting from my cigarrette Into the light above Take me away sweet friend My soul has gone black I cannot understand anything Anything real to me In an instant it ends I drift back into reality Questioning almost everything Fearing the breathing me ----- wow, very well written... take care, jm< !signature--> Now for me some words come easy But I know that they don't mean that much Compared with the things that are said when lovers touch You never knew what I loved in you I don't know what you loved in me Maybe the picture of somebody you were hoping I might be jackson browne [This message has been edited by Janet Marie (edited 03-14-2000).] |
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childomine Senior Member
since 2000-01-25
Posts 818st. petersburg, FL |
I don't know if I "see" what you wanted me too but, I saw death, not only to the body but also to the soul. For me this was a very intense piece of work Jamie. I hope I didn't mess up the meaning with my interpretation. |
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Another Heather Member
since 2000-02-17
Posts 93Canada |
well obviously I won't get everything the way you do, but I got something. You have great talent. I especially liked the reoccuring "Anything real to me" Really great work, Wikket! "Be yourself... No matter what they say" - Sting |
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wonderous Member
since 2000-02-29
Posts 75 |
i see damnation for a fallen soul is that it? i hope i havent messed up the interpretation i agree with childomine -very intense |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
It may sound weird, but I do understand this poem and not. It "feels" familiar, yet I cannot explain it in words. Hmmm, that helps huh ?  Enjoyed it a lot Wikket ! |
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Gene Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935Colorado, USA |
Jamie, Very intense, I like it. And I did understand most of it. ~Gene |
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Jon Mewett Senior Member
since 2000-03-04
Posts 1304 |
Hi wikket There is in life a large black cloud that draws you to it with intense gravity. But beyond that cloud there is a pinprick of light. Go for that light with all of your worth. You will discover that what's small in the distance,close up is really big. By your poem I can see you already know this. Well written if I may say so wikket. Jon |
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Aimster Member Elite
since 2000-02-19
Posts 4297Charlotte, NC |
Wikket~ This was wow! Sorry I am for a lack of words today. This was really great though! I don't know if I got it right...but I agree with the others. This has to do with death, but not so much physical death. It has to do more along with death of the heart, and the soul. Hope I got it the way you intended. At any rate, excellent piece...very powerful. Thanks for sharing with us. Amy  ~Live today as though it were your last but prepare for tomorrow as though it were here~ |
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Little_Spyro Senior Member
since 2000-01-09
Posts 659San Diego, CA, USA |
Well, three pictures come to mind: falling into that place with the nine circles, the aftereffects of smoking, and a very very bad dream...don't know if any of those are right, but there's endless ways of interpretation! Amazing poem, Jamie!  Little Spyro T. Dragon |
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Wikket Member
since 2000-01-29
Posts 340Santa Clara, CA USA |
Thank you all for commenting, and giving your own interperatations. Let me give you the skinny on my thinking, since you all gave yours: "Take me away my friend..." --A reference to alcohol...was very deep into that at one point in my life. It was the only non-judging friend I had. The falling Angel --Me in a way, as in everyone else. You see, no matter how high you have traveled, how far you have gone; all it takes is one little thing to let you 'fall back to earth' and realize you are not the center of the universe and you do not know everything you think you do! "...fearing the breathing me..." --I'm afraid of what I might accomplish or not accomplish. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. And thus, if I'm alive, anything I do could have serious reprocussions...like what happened to Mr. Angel in my story here. He thought he was untouchable, but he fell down too. Anyways, thanks again for brainstorming...I'm glad you all enjoyed it! ~~Jamie   I mean the opposite of what I say. You've got it now? No, it's the other way. ~Bruce Bennett |
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