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just_another_fe
Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 483
MICHIGAN

0 posted 2000-02-06 02:31 PM


As cold as ice
hard as a rock.
Blade like a knife
stabbed into my heart.
blood pouring out
Making a mess.
maybe when im dead
my heart can rest.


© Copyright 2000 Angie - All Rights Reserved
Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
1 posted 2000-02-06 03:43 PM


That's a very powerful and emotioanl poem you wrote there. You say a lot with very few words. Well done ! Welcome to Passions  
Wikket
Member
since 2000-01-29
Posts 340
Santa Clara, CA USA
2 posted 2000-02-06 05:37 PM


To the point and definately painting a rich portrait of emotion and longing.  Bravo and Welcome!!!!  


 "...at night I cling to you I'm so afraid;
afraid the day will come
and I'll wake up and find you gone.
But you promise that you'd not abandon me
and kissed my fears away
but I woke up to that day..."
'Waking up Beside You' by Stabbing Westward

JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
3 posted 2000-02-06 09:59 PM


I love short poems like this that have such a powerful message hidden in so few words!  

Joy

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

4 posted 2000-02-07 12:19 PM


Short but says so much. Well done!

Denise

Gene
Senior Member
since 2000-01-23
Posts 935
Colorado, USA
5 posted 2000-02-07 01:47 PM


Hey Just, -- I like a good dark poem once in a while. This one says about all you need to say.

Pretty sary, though.  I hope you don't really feel this way. Na, you can't, you're too concerned about making a mess.  

~Gene


Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 1999-09-17
Posts 1495
Canyon Country, CA
6 posted 2000-02-08 04:53 PM


WoW, you have said so much in these few words!  It is sad sometimes how we think that it takes something such as death to end the suffering and everything else in our hearts, when in reality it really doesnt!  This is a great poem, and I can honestly say I have felt the same way myself!

 Just be glad I'm not your child! *evil grin*


Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
7 posted 2000-02-08 08:17 PM


Boy, I hope he read this one, cause it sure gets the point across in a hurry.
Well done!
Liz

just_another_fe
Member
since 2000-02-05
Posts 483
MICHIGAN
8 posted 2000-02-09 01:22 AM


THANKS FOR REPLYING EVERYONE. IT MEANS A LOT AND IM GLAD YOU GUYZ LIKED MY POEM. AT NO POINT WOULD I EVER TAKE MY OWN LIFE FOR A GUY BUT IT SEEMS LIKE THATS THE EASIEST AND BEST WAY OUT SOMETIME.  (HIS LOVE REALLY IS LIKE THAT) N E WAY THANK YOU ALL  
kaile
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146
singapore
9 posted 2000-12-26 12:47 PM


i have a soft spot for short poems and i think you have done well with this one...
kcsgrandma
Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1522
Presque Isle, ME
10 posted 2000-12-26 06:28 PM


My goodness!  This is certainly not what I expected from the title!  It is very powerful, though.  I also admire people who can say a lot in a few words.  

To love another person is to see the face of God.
- Les Miserables

Marilyn

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