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aries_luv_ppl
Senior Member
since 2001-09-20
Posts 1448
Universal Mind

0 posted 2001-12-20 07:53 PM


O repent my heart
melt me in thy loving pot
O repent my heart

//I'm asking God to change my heart to be caring.


~Flower lasts so an hour, yet spring will brings her back to life again.
~Just when I thought it is too far away, opportunity knocks the door

[This message has been edited by aries_luv_ppl (12-20-2001 10:39 PM).]

© Copyright 2001 Eliza Simmons - All Rights Reserved
his poet II
Junior Member
since 2001-12-20
Posts 18

1 posted 2001-12-20 09:25 PM


aries luv ppl, very nice haiku with a tender request. Haikus are lovely in their simplicity and yours is beautiful. Just remember, a haiku's 1st and 3rd line is supposed to be 5 syllables, so you might want to add one more syll. Repent, O' my heart
Just a suggestion. Haikus are one of my favorite forms of poetry.  Cheryl

[This message has been edited by his poet II (12-20-2001 09:27 PM).]

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
2 posted 2001-12-22 04:20 PM




(sigh) Oh Eliza, you are such a loving and beautiful friend to us all, and you have a caring heart that always shines as pure as gold! (sigh) His love always mirrors in your heart, and we all love you so much, sweet friend! (kiss on cheek) You are an angel to us all, sweet friend, have the happiest holidays! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Eliza, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

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