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Trillium
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Idaho, USA

0 posted 2001-05-05 11:37 AM


Behold the mountains in the light
That heralds the passing of the night.
They rise majestically, serene.
Their timbered slopes, the darkest green
And up above, where snow fields lie,
That capture color from the sky,
The faintest shade of pink is born,
To usher in approaching morn.
The hush is broken before long,
By birds, who sing their morning song.
Small clouds appear far overhead.
The sun bursts from it's eastern bed
And looking at this lovely view,
Which moves the soul, my heart sings too
And if you think that this is grand,
Just wait till God reclaims His land!


Betty Lou Hebert


Published in Tucumcari Literary Review and in The Sunflower Dream, 1998

[This message has been edited by Trillium (edited 05-05-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Betty Lou Hebert - All Rights Reserved
Allan Riverwood
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since 2001-01-04
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Winnipeg
1 posted 2001-05-05 12:04 PM


Iambic Tetrameter is a great form to use, but the second line was one syllable over.  I think if you remove the first "the," it would fit Iambic Tetrameter best.  
"That heralds passing of the night."
Otherwise, great poem.  The flow was incredible.  
~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day.  Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.  
~Unknown

Joyce Johnson
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Washington State
2 posted 2001-05-05 02:32 PM


This is beautiful Betty and I guess Allen is right.  I have never seen you stumble in the least before.  Great poem.  Joyce
Trillium
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3 posted 2001-05-05 07:54 PM


Dear Allen:  You are right and thanks for drawing this to my attention.  I don't know how I missed this, as it is really quite obvious. Not concentrating hard enough! Glad you liked it anyway.

Joyce:  Thanks for commenting and for also catching my mistake.

Betty Lou Hebert

2dalimit
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since 2000-02-08
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Mississippi coast
4 posted 2001-05-06 07:40 AM


This is majestically perfect. The mental challenge is magnificent.
Melton

WhtDove
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since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
5 posted 2001-05-06 11:31 AM


Encore!! This was perfection!

What beauty is displayed here. This takes me back to those mornings in Colorado, when I could watch the sun come up and hit the top of the mountains. It was a breathtaking sight every morning! I so appreciated being able to view that scene.

Thanks for bringing me back.

<*\\\><    

I know not what the future holds,
but I know Who holds the future.

I don't question YOUR existance - GOD


Trillium
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6 posted 2001-05-06 01:34 PM


Melton:  Thank you so much for your nice comments.
WhtDove:  Thank you and glad this brought back special memories for you!

Betty Lou Hebert

ellie LeJeune
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since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156
King of Prussia, PA USA
7 posted 2001-05-07 01:37 AM


Magnificent poetry, You are surely a master of your craft and This poem is exquisite in every way....I could feel and see the imagery you so beautifully created! Ellie

A friend hears the song in my heart, and sings it to me when my memory fails.

VAS
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since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
8 posted 2001-05-07 09:37 AM


Superbly crafted, Betty, absolutely serene and yet invigorating with the promise of a wonderful day.  Your eyes are sharp your vision clear, thanks for sharing this, my dear.  
Trillium
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9 posted 2001-05-08 12:21 PM


Dear ellie and VAS:  Both of you made such lovely comments about this poem.  Thanks you very much.

Betty Lou Hebert

Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
10 posted 2001-05-09 08:49 PM


BettyLou~
Stunning.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
                               noles1@totcon.com             

Lighthousebob
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since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725
California
11 posted 2001-05-09 09:11 PM


Trillium

Your poem paints a beautiful picture that really brings the reader into it to enjoy.  Very picturesque.... makes me dream of what the new Heaven and the new Earth will be like one day when we see the sun set for the last time.  Bob <><

Songbird
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since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184
Missouri
12 posted 2001-05-10 07:40 PM


Yes, we may be in a perputual beauty of morning, one that we can enjoy fully awake with our eyes open.  Lovely thought provoking poem.
Trillium
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13 posted 2001-05-10 08:08 PM


Marge, Bob and Songbird:  Thank you all for reading and making such nice comments.

Betty Lou Hebert

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