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Spirits Windchimes
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Spirits Windchimes |
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ellie LeJeune Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156King of Prussia, PA USA 
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The windchimes < !signature-->are silent now. The breeze too soft to make them sing. They sway so gently, in silence of a summers eve. In my mind I can hear the gentle song they sing, When summer winds conduct their melody. The Spirit of God is so like the wind, invisible to the eye. Yet ever blowing through our hearts, that we might play our song. A soul devoid of Gods Spirit wind is a silent instrument. It knows not the chords to play it's part, for the Conductor it can not see. But if our eyes are turned upon the One who leads us all, Spirits Baton will fill the soul with winds to play our part, and souls together play their song in perfect harmony. Summers haunting melody that awakens the butterflies, calling them to join the dance in their silent song of praise to God. ellie LeJeune [This message has been edited by ellie LeJeune (edited 06-23-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 ellie LeJeune - All Rights Reserved | |||
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jfreak Member
since 1999-06-17
Posts 306Yuma, AZ, USA |
Ellie, Hey there just wanted to say that I liked this poem. The symbolizm with Wind Chimes and the human spirit was pretty good. The one question or critique I have is the second three line stanza. "The Spirit of God is so like the wind, invisible to the eye" I just think you might need to extend this stanza or cut it out. It just doesn't fit with the rest of the poems rhythm. I understand why you put it there to pull the beginning and the end together but, it just kind of throws a wrench in the whole rhythm. It just feels out of place. I like the idea. The use of imagery is good: "Spirits Baton will fill the soul with winds to play our part," Pretty awesome line. Poem just needs a little tweaking. In my opinion. And that is just my opinion. J~ |
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ellie LeJeune Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156King of Prussia, PA USA |
J; I agree, so I added a line where you suggested and it reads much better, Thanks for the insight. Ellie |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Like the spirit windchime's song... so do our souls sing to each other... Ellie, I love all of my windchimes [front, back and side of the house...] and you've transformed the beauty of their music into a lovely tribute. Thank you. Sunshine ~~~Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. Helen Keller ~~~ |
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Dennis L. White Senior Member
since 2000-02-17
Posts 1463Michigan, U.S.A. |
Ellie, This poem is sweet music to my ears, and to my heart! YES we were designed for a purpose and if we attune ourselves to our MAKERS will, our very lives will be sweet music before HIM. Beautifully written. Dennis :^) |
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
Ellie you need to post this for the book, it sure would get my vote. |
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Alle'cram Senior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 1816Texas |
Perfect, ellie, I love the analogy of the Holy Spirit to wind and windchimes and a song in our soul. Just beautiful, as usual. |
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deleeme Senior Member
since 1999-10-09
Posts 1766NEW ENGLAND, USA |
Dear Ellie, This combining of the terrestial, the celestial, and the spiritual in such melodical harmony is awesome. Such a great message too. I give it an A+ , a wonderful submission! David |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Oh Ellie - Just what I needed to hear, the soft song of windchimes. This is just perfectly beautiful. "The Spirit of God is so like the wind, invisible to the eye. Yet ever blowing through our hearts, that we might play our song." I love this Ellie. Bonnie |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Absolutely beautiful and inspiring, Ellie! Denise |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Ellie~ As I read this poem the wind is gently buffeting and the windchimes on my porch are softly playing. Lovely, lovely thoughts. ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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