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Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704


0 posted 1999-12-01 05:35 AM


I'd never known
such peace
as the core of drifting
you settled in my soul
I'd never felt it
before my Lord

not in the touch
of my Mother's hand
before I slept
not in the voice
of trees lulling
me silent while
inside I bled
not in the kiss
of one who
loved me true

Never

I felt
I knew
the truth
of you

now I've fallen so far

How do I recapture you?
Lord?
Can you hear?

You performed private miracles
gifts apart for me
and still

I taste the whisper of coincidence

I caught the difference
between belief
and knowing

now I live the torture of ever-doubting

You gave me verse
for you know
the Word I fear

now all sight seems dead to me

I question
I curse
I scream at empty clouds

and all I long for
Lord
are your hands holding
close my heart

I want
the want
of loving you

Sovereign Lord
I never can deny
yet never do I find...

I miss my known peace of you

KM 1.12.99

© Copyright 1999 Kamla Mahony - All Rights Reserved
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
1 posted 1999-12-01 10:26 AM


Severn this was really touching. He does hear you, always! He is with you always. When we get lost the closest way back to Him is through His word, and prayer.
I know I've felt this way many times. I am still searching that question of how can I get back what I once had.
There is no other peace, like the peace He gives to us. That's for sure!

Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
2 posted 1999-12-01 01:56 PM


Severn,
I'm so glad you have been "drawn" to this forum, I so truly feel the emotion behind you poetry. Hang in there, girl, "Seek and ye shall find, ask and it shall be opened unto you." There is a reason for you to be where you are right now and God is definately the peace you seek. Bless you.

Michael

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

3 posted 1999-12-01 04:47 PM


WD - I think God creates a special kind of peace that is His alone. - All the times I lose sight of Him (which has been most of the time in the last few years) it is the memory of that peace that always prevents me from saying outright 'He doesn't exist'. Thanks for your words.

Michael - Ah yes, an elderly man said to me just out of the blue the other day 'these things are sent to test us' and I replied to God rather cynically, 'OK - but so MANY things God?!' No - I do agree, there seems to be a pattern behind it all, all working for the good somehow - it's just hard to see the light at the moment that's all. Remember, Michael, how you once said you would like to be a fly on the wall witnessing me as half a certain debating team? Well - it is my penchant for questioning that drives me away from God.
I'm glad you're glad I'm here - it'll be hard to get rid of me now!!
Thankyou Kamla.

Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 1999-09-17
Posts 1495
Canyon Country, CA
4 posted 1999-12-01 05:11 PM


I can only 'echo' the above statements!


------------------
~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~



Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

5 posted 1999-12-01 10:22 PM


This is beautiful, Severn. May His peace ever shine upon you!

------------------
Denise


mirjam
Member
since 1999-11-24
Posts 246
Auckland, New Zealand
6 posted 1999-12-03 05:33 PM


Oh severn. You have touched not only our hearts with this beautiful poem, but have touched the Lord's. You know just as you miss the peace that only He can offer, He misses being given the opportunity to administer that peace in your soul, and longs for you to let him in - just let go Kamla and place everything in his hands, he will hold your heart, he will hear your cries, he will give you peace. I love the lines "how do I recapture you?" it reminds me of trying to remember what a painting looked like - i guess it's like that with God, when it's been so long since you've felt his presence, you want to be in that quiet place again. All you need do is ask.
I also liked the line "I taste the whisper of coincidence" - it's so easy to listen to the doubts that come and persuade you that something God did was actually just a co-incidence, but you're right - there is a pattern because God has a plan for your life, and things will work out right. Bless ya. Mirjam

poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite
since 1999-07-25
Posts 2646
Arkansas
7 posted 1999-12-04 05:01 PM


Severn...go into Open, and look at my poem titled "Checkers of Destiny"......I wrote it along this very same line. I too, at times question what is happening to me, and why...It's hard not to, when you're a thinker, and a planner... I think you'll like how I finally chose to follow my fate, and God's will in my own life, maybe it will help you too. I almost posted it here in spiritual....but thought more would see it and maybe find peace in reading it out there in Open. Let me know if it helps at all, ok?

------------------
- - - If I can just touch you once, then I feel I have accomplished what I am called to do....- - pFF

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
8 posted 1999-12-04 05:30 PM


This is lovely - You (along with Izzy) give me new appreciation for free verse....
MADDavid
Junior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 26
Carrollton, TX, USA
9 posted 1999-12-05 01:06 AM


Severn..I just read your heart..I had to go very slowly and let your cry become mine as I entwined my spirit with your spirit,for it is our spirits that cry out Abba,Father..the cry was one of great beauty, my dear, and I know I was not the only one who heard you- ok? Think on this...sometimes it is a good thing to let those we love get seperated for a while, just so they can see just how wonderful it is[that which has been given us]. That tremendous drawing you feel tearing your heart out is the"power" of the LOVE of the Lord for you. You may think it is your heart straining for Him; or you may think it is His heart drawing unto you, & you are right in both thoughts! This was so deep & so tender & so yearning that I just wanted to "beam you up" Severn..& I'll bet someone higher is doing just that..be patient and submissive to the spirit and you will find what your inner man seeks! You stay in here,ok,and read the Word & pray..Love your poetry--how about more? Femme's Father
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

10 posted 1999-12-05 02:57 PM


Thankyou all for your fantastic support - it means much. I constantly teeter onthe edge of not being with Him and vv. Your friendship really helps.

Femme - off to do so now.
David - what an enticement to write more! Thankyou! And your words have been heard.
Nan - glad to oblige.  
Denise - You're just a sweetie.
Echo -  
Mirjam - And you mean to say you got cut off in the middle of this? WOW. Thankyou dear friend.

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