Toerag's Wife's Dilemma - pipTalk Forums

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Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

0 posted 1999-12-17 03:59 PM

Old Toerag's wife gave me a call and said" I'm in a stew!
That bum is somewhere drinking and I need a hand from you.
I had a little accident. The coffee overturned
And splattered on the counter. I'm afraid my face got burned!"

So quickly I rushed over there, soon as I got the call
And said 'Dear girl, I'm taking you straight to the hospital!"
I rushed her to emergency. Her wound was quite severe.
How fortunate that she could call on helpful Balladeer.

The doc said, "That's a nasty burn. It must be 3rd degree.
We have no options, I'm afraid, except for surgery.
We need to do a skin graft where the burn is, on the cheek
Then it should heal nicely, I would think, within a week."

The doc said, "Hey, I know you, son. You're called the Balladeer.
I've heard the women talk about the softness of your rear.
If we could use a little patch to cure Ms. Toerag's burn
I have no doubt her natural appearance would return."

So I agreed. I mean, how in the world could I say no
To help the wife and live-in maid of my good buddy Toe?
The operation went as planned. In one week she was cured
And she stopped by to thank me for the pain I had endured.

She said, "Oh, Mister Balladeer, I'm well because of you.
I wish there were some special thing that I could do for you."
I started laughing so hard it was difficult to speak,
Then said, "Dear, I'm well paid each time Toe plants one on your cheek!!!"

RainbowGirl
Member Elite

since 1999-07-31

Posts 3023
United Kingdom

1 posted 1999-12-17 04:02 PM

ROFLMAO...many times over!!...oooops Sorry Toe...ROFL

*poof*

Yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream...

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

2 posted 1999-12-17 04:08 PM

I'd heard this where the mother-in-law was doing the kissing. *G* Well done, scalawag.

Toe: Perhaps this would be a good time to send that card to Balladeer... I know he needs cheering... the poor man is skinny as a rail... Mr. Loneliness must not be a good cook! LOL

John Yaws
Senior Member

since 1999-10-09

Posts 860
Texas

3 posted 1999-12-17 04:10 PM

Mister! You are one of a kind! ROFLMBO..You are too much. I love it.

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

4 posted 1999-12-17 04:16 PM

Great re-butt-al, Balladeer! Hillarious!

Denise

RSEvans
Senior Member

since 1999-10-23

Posts 1147
Tulsa, OK, USA

5 posted 1999-12-17 04:27 PM

I've been told Toe is planning his "revenge". Very Amusing Bal!

Pepper
Member Elite

since 1999-08-19

Posts 3079
Southern Florida

6 posted 1999-12-17 04:58 PM

ROFL....

....Tooo Funny....!!

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

7 posted 1999-12-17 05:47 PM

Fell off my chair
onto my bum
all because
you were having fun!

Great stuff!

Isis
Member Ascendant

since 1999-09-06

Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland

8 posted 1999-12-17 05:54 PM

Thanks for the laugh my friend

As always

What the inner voice says will NOT disappoint the hoping soul.
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)

Marilyn
Member Elite

since 1999-09-26

Posts 2621
Ontario, Canada

9 posted 1999-12-17 05:57 PM

ROTFLMAO...now that is what I call the sweetest revenge.

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

10 posted 1999-12-17 06:09 PM

Balladeer,
I told Toe he was in big trouble
And you didn't let me down,
Great one. Sy

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

11 posted 1999-12-17 10:10 PM

Butt, BallaDeer....

Alwye

Moderator

Member Elite

since 1999-06-16

Posts 3850
In the space between moments

12 posted 1999-12-17 10:14 PM

LOL, this is great! Talk about a great way for revenge...

*Krista Knutson*

~Only within the depths of the most ominous darkness can the beauty of light truly be understood~

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-22

Posts 9245
Illinois

13 posted 1999-12-17 10:33 PM

ROFL...what an "ending!" Good one...I sure am gonna miss this when Toe goes...you two are just something else!

Mayme David
New Member

since 1999-11-21

Posts 8
Carrollton, TX, USA

14 posted 1999-12-17 10:37 PM

Your so fast with the reply. I believe I will not test your wit. Great response.

Light hath power over darkness.

sandgrain
Member Elite

since 1999-09-21

Posts 3662
Sycamore, IL, USA

15 posted 1999-12-17 11:05 PM

I'm definitely getting the message of who to be careful of! Got a real bang out of this one.

poetFemmeFatale
Member Elite

since 1999-07-25

Posts 2646
Arkansas

16 posted 1999-12-19 01:04 AM

If you two don't stop this nonsense, I'm gonna have to start wearing my depends when I read this stuff!! (weak bladder!) ROFLMAO Just kidding! I'm only 27 !! PdV is the one who wears 'em...not me! I'll see if she'll loan me one! LOL

- - - If I can just touch you once, then I feel I have accomplished what I am called to do...- - pFF

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

17 posted 1999-12-19 01:52 AM

Balladeer -
Just too funny for words !
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

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