Sitting in Michael's Lap
"When faithfulness brings loneliness ... can you then endure?"
Those three lines sum it all up for me -- why cling to what is right when it only ends the same way as wrong, which is so much easier?
Excellent thoughts here. Keep exploring this -- "eke it out in ink," as you say. Things will get better, I promise!
You cannot choose the way of your death, but the path you choose will determine its own end.