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Passions in Poetry

12 Days of Christmas (WhtDove's challenge)

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Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


0 posted 12-06-1999 02:08 AM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Echo Rhayne

First off I just have to say that I did this in like 10 minutes about 5 hours after I got home from the hospital full of meds.  So it isnt too great.  And it is a bit different, but thats only because I am also     Tell me what you think....and dont try to sing it, it doest quite work that way LoL


On the first day of Christmas
my true love...wait a minute
he was supposed to give me...
boy, he's gonna get it

On the second day of Christmas
my true love finally called
said he needed a ride
cause his brand new Z3 stalled

On the third day of Christmas
my true love came over
it was a miracle I swear
that he was actually sober

On the fourth day of Christmas
my true love gave to me
yeah he finally gave me something
a headache and a pepsi

On the fifth day of Christmas
my true love...I'm beginning to wonder here
I never pictured a true love like this
I'm taking away all his beer

On the sixth day of Christmas
I smacked him across the face
HEY, I had to do something
he was way far out of place

On the seventh day of Christmas
that jerk made me so mad
what on earth did I do wrong?
I gave him all I had

On the eighth day of Christmas
my 'true love' still didn't have a clue
maybe he's not my true love after all
what do you think I should do?

On the ninth day of Christmas
I told my true love how I felt
there it was laid out in front
the winning hand was dealt

On the tenth day of Christmas
I finally had enough
I told him to get out
and packed up all his stuff

On the eleventh day of Christmas
my true love finally saw
how much that he was doing wrong
when I laid down the law

On the twelfth day of Christmas
my true love gave to me
12 long stem roses
and a giant stuffed Monkey

*note...this is not a true story, this in no way reflects my true love (accept the twelfth day)     
SOOOOOOO what did ya think??




 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns.  But a place of torment because the light of God is gone.  To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~




[This message has been edited by Echo Rhayne (edited 12-06-1999).]
© Copyright 1999 Echo Rhayne - All Rights Reserved
PhaerieChild
Senior Member
since 08-30-99
Posts 1829
Aloha, Oregon


1 posted 12-06-1999 04:47 AM       View Profile for PhaerieChild   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PhaerieChild

Echo, I thought this was hilarious!! I loved every word. Hope you have real happy holidays this season and he gave you a monkey? I love it!!

 If you love me like music, I'll be your song.
~Heart~ Dreamboat Annie

Shawna R. Holder
Boise, Idaho


Pepper
Member Elite
since 08-19-99
Posts 3134
Southern Florida

Official Passions Reader
2 posted 12-06-1999 10:06 AM       View Profile for Pepper   Email Pepper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Pepper

LOL....
Love your humor in this piece Echo!!


 A soul that writes from the heart and shares it, truly gives a gift extraordinaire!


WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


3 posted 12-06-1999 10:36 AM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

See, I told ya so!     I got a kick out of it too. It is different and humorous. And that's a good thing!

 <*\\\><
Jesus is the reason for the season

Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


4 posted 12-06-1999 02:11 PM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

Thanks WildChild and pepper!

Yeah ok you told me Rebecca....rub it in, rub it in   j/k

 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~


Terrina Kethryveris
Member
since 12-06-1999
Posts 57
USA


5 posted 12-06-1999 03:02 PM       View Profile for Terrina Kethryveris   Email Terrina Kethryveris   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Terrina Kethryveris

Far be it for me to complain...If I can catch my breath long enough to make this statement...But it seems you for the tenth day any reason? Or maybe it was on the tenth day he was passsed out on the couch?  

LOL...This is truly great. Loved it!

Terri


 Truth be known, fantasy is much more appealing than reality.
Ohme
Senior Member
since 07-17-99
Posts 831
Texas


6 posted 12-06-1999 03:33 PM       View Profile for Ohme   Email Ohme   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ohme

I think it's cute. I enjoyed it!
Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


7 posted 12-06-1999 04:35 PM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

Terri...LoL, sorry, I added it in.  Thanks for pointing it out!  

Thank you kindly ohme!  

 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


8 posted 12-06-1999 04:49 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

There's nothing like improvising and creating to make something great. Great wit and good 'thinking on your feet' poetry here, Echo.
Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


9 posted 12-06-1999 05:30 PM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

Thanks Balladeer...I do try, sometimes (this wasn't one of them LoL)...Thanks for reading and responding!


 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~


Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 08-22-99
Posts 23002


10 posted 12-06-1999 10:16 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

I thought this was hillarious too! Very fun read!

 Denise


Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


11 posted 12-07-1999 03:10 AM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

Thanks Denise!


 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~


Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 06-15-99
Posts 7276
Mobile, AL


12 posted 12-07-1999 03:21 AM       View Profile for Temptress   Email Temptress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Temptress

It was delightful to open this forum after so long of being wary of it, and find something as delightful as this. Thanks for the cheer. This will definetely help my holiday along. LOL!  Of course I do mean the the whole idea not the unfortunate *wink* situation was delightful.
Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


13 posted 12-07-1999 03:23 AM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

hehe thanks Temptress!  Welcome back!

 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~


Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 08-04-99
Posts 10270


14 posted 12-07-1999 03:52 AM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

Hey Echo I thought this was kewl, well done!  


 What comes from the heart goes to the heart.
Samuel Coleridge


Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


15 posted 12-07-1999 03:54 AM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

Thank you kinldy WildChild...

I am glad everyone is liking this  

 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~


RainbowGirl
Member Elite
since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


16 posted 12-07-1999 08:06 AM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Echo:  I love to read the ones that make me laugh and yours certainly did..

HUGS

 Yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream...


Echo Rhayne
Senior Member
since 09-17-99
Posts 1538
Canyon Country, CA


17 posted 12-07-1999 05:08 PM       View Profile for Echo Rhayne   Email Echo Rhayne   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Echo Rhayne

I think thats what I was going for (the laugh) so I am glad its workin.  Thanks!


 ~*~ Hell is not a place of fire and a devil with a tail and horns. But a place of torment because the light of God is gone. To escape this, accept the blood of Jesus Christ! ~*~


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