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Passions in Poetry

No Bugs You'll See...Or It's Free..Balladeer's Guarantee!

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Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


0 posted 12-01-1999 03:18 PM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Toerag

Balladeer's out-killin' bugs,
In housewive's cubboards and under rugs.
Chasin' mice and other critters,
Like fleas and termites, maybe chiggers.

His price is high unless the lady,
Has great big breasts and legs quite shapely.
Then the price goes way way down,
If she's in a sheer nightgown.

Under houses, beneath those sinks,
Sprayin' poison while he thinks;
"This gal's a fox, why should she pay?
We'll put this bill on "lay-a-way!"

Then when his "job" is finally done,
And her charges equal "none,"
He'll smile and say, "Why thank you ma'am,
Can I show you our daily plan?"

It comes complete with guarantee,
Or else I'll "come" again for free.
I guess that's not much different than,
What I did today, just sign here ma'am."


[This message has been edited by Toerag (edited 12-01-1999).]
© Copyright 1999 Toerag - All Rights Reserved
suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


1 posted 12-01-1999 03:26 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

ROFLMAO.... but I feel I've been cheated... my Orkin man always wants a check! *G* Guess I'm not foxy enough for "lay-a-way!" Great job, Toe... that ought to have the bug man crawlin' out soon! *G*
Dolphins3
Member
since 09-30-1999
Posts 142
Wisconsin


2 posted 12-01-1999 03:30 PM       View Profile for Dolphins3   Email Dolphins3   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dolphins3

Toerag, Great poem. You having me giggling away here. I love it.
RSEvans
Senior Member
since 10-23-1999
Posts 1187
Tulsa, OK, USA


3 posted 12-01-1999 03:53 PM       View Profile for RSEvans   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RSEvans

Love it! and I'm not in it so that makes it even better...LOL.
suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


4 posted 12-01-1999 03:59 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Now, now, Robert... where's your sense of adventure??? LOL

(Toerag, sweets... looks like email hell has struck again... smooch!)
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


5 posted 12-01-1999 05:21 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

ROFLMBO...Toe you've out done yourself. This was excellent!
Suthern, maybe if you had that see through nighty on. LOL...
Nan
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since 05-20-99
Posts 24426
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


6 posted 12-01-1999 05:24 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

I was wondering why my bill was so low..... But why do you suppose I still had those sill bugs in my house the next day??? Huh???
Marilyn
Member Elite
since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


7 posted 12-01-1999 07:18 PM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

Hey Nan...was that Tuesday Nov.23rd? same thing happened at my place!! Think it was something in the bug spray that day??...lol.
Ohme
Senior Member
since 07-17-99
Posts 831
Texas


8 posted 12-01-1999 08:22 PM       View Profile for Ohme   Email Ohme   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Ohme

RATS, and I live in an apartment where management pays for the BUG KILLERS, LOL. Great Toe!
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


9 posted 12-02-1999 07:37 AM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

Thanks all....I guess Balladeer had a "late nite" service call.....or he wouldda plucked my chest hairs out one at a time?.....
suthern
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since 07-29-99
Posts 20770
on the threshold of a dream


10 posted 12-02-1999 02:53 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Biz'ness must be booming
Or the bug man would be looming
To have his retaliation
For this latest indignation.
Forgive me now if I blunder
But I can't much help but wonder
This "work" may give him lots of thrills
But how does 'Deer pay his own bills?
Sally S.
Senior Member
since 06-07-99
Posts 887
Ohio


11 posted 12-02-1999 03:05 PM       View Profile for Sally S.   Email Sally S.   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sally S.

I'm sure he's contemplating his retaliation...all in due time, Toe. Can't wait to see it myself. hehehe
Are you quite sure you'll be leaving us? You know, it just won't be the same.
For what it's worth, I wish you luck in all your endeavors.
JTF
Member
since 08-09-99
Posts 325
France


12 posted 12-03-1999 04:41 AM       View Profile for JTF   Email JTF   Edit/Delete Message     View IP for JTF

ROFLMAO ... well, you can imagine more tedious ways to get paid ... but Toe, ain't Bal shattered before the end of his day ... he isn't that young anymore ya know ? ...
 
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