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Wallowing
| Open Poetry #4 |
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Wallowing |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana 
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There was a time I thought I mattered Every dream has now been shattered Each hope lies severely battered And breathing still goes on. I never thought I'd be your wife But counted on a friend for life Fantasy succumbs to reality's knife And I am all alone. There are those who mock and gloat, Say anything to get my goat (Not knowing they sail this same boat Whatever they believe.) A slutty precedent they're setting They want you too, (but they're not getting!) I've searched for strength but now I'm letting Go, giving up to grief. I can't keep enduring this pain I'm off to find a friendly train That'll end at last this sad refrain And give, at last, relief. Disclaimer: This is a poem, not a plan. *G* Y'all ain't gettin' rid of me that easily! LOL |
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| © Copyright 1999 suthern - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Suthern, sounds like you have an Amtrack mind! Good thing you put that disclaimer in there. I'll put your picture on milk cartons if you try to leave here! The poem is excellent. I'm not convinced you know how good you really are. |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Suthern: Want to hop on my rainbow, I can promise you one heck of a view? HUSG my friend ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Balladeer: I've just read "A Small Pain in My Chest" once again... and any compliment from someone who gave life to those words is greatly appreciated! BTW: Could you make that a pre-Amtrak picture? *G* That'll ruin enough breakfasts! LOL RG: You snuck in on me... *G* Naw... you're the rainbow... I'll just enjoy your colors! *S* [This message has been edited by suthern (edited 11-11-1999).] |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Balladeer, if I weren't in such a solemn frame of mind right now, I'd probably reply with; "She is Blonde yanno?"...... Great work again gal....I'm sure glad ya put that disclaimer on there. Another spanking wouldda been in order...okay, I'd done something that would have been uncomfortable anyhow.... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Toerag: But I know how good YOU really are. Doesn't that count for something? *G* Thanks, sweetie.  And now... what's this? That disclaimer made me miss out on a spanking... Just a sec... I'll edit! LOL |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Suthern: You cheeky minx...ROFL Love you HUSG ------------------ You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I really liked this poem, suthern. I've felt this way a few times myself. (psst! What's a slutty precedent? Can I have one?  ) |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Very well written, as always, suthern |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
PDV: If you don't know, I'm not gonna tell you... the world has enough sluts and I'd rather have your friendship! *G* Hoot: Thank you! RG: Who, me? (innocent look) Just cuz I don't wanna miss out on something I richly deserve? *EG* |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
suthern....great writing my friend. Hey...I don't blame you for wanting that spankin...lol. |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Ya know - You can go just about anywhere you want on that train.... |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
This is fabulous, Suthern. I could feel the suffering in this. ------------------ Denise |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Nan: Thanks... but the train isn't to ride... it's to step in front of! (Which is why 'Deer really doesn't want post-train pictures. *G*) dsnyder: Thank you very much! *S* Marilyn: One can always hope... right? *G* Thank you! |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Suthern, you've explained the hurt good, real good! But please don't go stepping in front of any trains now! I know I'd lose my breakfast for sure. LOL...naw...I hope you're feeling better soon, or whatever it is that has you so down...Kick them in the butt!!!! ~HUGS to ya!~ |
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doreen peri Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812Virginia |
Hey wait a minute! Did I write this? LOL... just kidding... wish I did.... sounds very familiar. You have done an excellent job with meter, rhyme, and flow.... not to mention the dynamic of the subject matter. Well done, indeed!  dp |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
I know where you are coming from!! I have been there myself a lot on and off in the past 3 years. In the end of your poem is the secret, let it go and move on. A change IS as good as a holiday (or almost!!) ------------------ Through poetry my heart and soul truly sing... ~Isis~ (Daughter of Mystery) |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
WhtDove: Thanks, lady. BTW... my pic would make you lose your breakfast even pre-train! LOL. Doreen & Isis: Thank you very much! (But I'd rather have the holiday! *G*) |
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Iloveit Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 1121NM |
hey I have it on good authority (mine) that she's fibbing, I have her pics and she's a doll ::oh......and a great poet.....love this girl |
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Craig Member
since 1999-06-10
Posts 444 |
I liked the flow in this and the feeling. I also like a wallow every now and again so you got me on all points. Well done. ------------------ Yes, I admit your general rule. That every poet is a fool: But I myself may serve to show it. That every fool is not a poet. |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Glad that I peeked in because I like this a lot. Alison |
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