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Passions in Poetry

Wallowing

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suthern
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since 07-29-99
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on the threshold of a dream


0 posted 11-11-1999 03:06 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for suthern

There was a time I thought I mattered
Every dream has now been shattered
Each hope lies severely battered
And breathing still goes on.
I never thought I'd be your wife
But counted on a friend for life
Fantasy succumbs to reality's knife
And I am all alone.
There are those who mock and gloat,
Say anything to get my goat
(Not knowing they sail this same boat
Whatever they believe.)
A slutty precedent they're setting
They want you too, (but they're not getting!)
I've searched for strength but now I'm letting
Go, giving up to grief.
I can't keep enduring this pain
I'm off to find a friendly train
That'll end at last this sad refrain
And give, at last, relief.

Disclaimer: This is a poem, not a plan. *G* Y'all ain't gettin' rid of me that easily! LOL
© Copyright 1999 suthern - All Rights Reserved
Balladeer
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since 06-05-99
Posts 26302
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA


1 posted 11-11-1999 03:14 PM       View Profile for Balladeer   Email Balladeer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Balladeer's Home Page   View IP for Balladeer

Suthern, sounds like you have an Amtrack mind! Good thing you put that disclaimer in there. I'll put your picture on milk cartons if you try to leave here!

The poem is excellent. I'm not convinced you know how good you really are.
RainbowGirl
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since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


2 posted 11-11-1999 03:24 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Suthern: Want to hop on my rainbow, I can promise you one heck of a view?

HUSG my friend

------------------
You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
suthern
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on the threshold of a dream


3 posted 11-11-1999 03:25 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Balladeer: I've just read "A Small Pain in My Chest" once again... and any compliment from someone who gave life to those words is greatly appreciated!

BTW: Could you make that a pre-Amtrak picture? *G* That'll ruin enough breakfasts! LOL

RG: You snuck in on me... *G* Naw... you're the rainbow... I'll just enjoy your colors! *S*

[This message has been edited by suthern (edited 11-11-1999).]
Toerag
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since 07-29-99
Posts 5839
Ala bam a


4 posted 11-11-1999 03:28 PM       View Profile for Toerag   Email Toerag   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Toerag

Balladeer, if I weren't in such a solemn frame of mind right now, I'd probably reply with; "She is Blonde yanno?"......

Great work again gal....I'm sure glad ya put that disclaimer on there. Another spanking wouldda been in order...okay, I'd done something that would have been uncomfortable anyhow....
suthern
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on the threshold of a dream


5 posted 11-11-1999 03:36 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Toerag: But I know how good YOU really are. Doesn't that count for something? *G*

Thanks, sweetie. And now... what's this? That disclaimer made me miss out on a spanking... Just a sec... I'll edit! LOL
RainbowGirl
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since 07-31-99
Posts 3167
United Kingdom


6 posted 11-11-1999 03:37 PM       View Profile for RainbowGirl   Email RainbowGirl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit RainbowGirl's Home Page   View IP for RainbowGirl

Suthern: You cheeky minx...ROFL

Love you

HUSG

------------------
You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
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Hurricane Alley


7 posted 11-11-1999 04:14 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

I really liked this poem, suthern. I've felt this way a few times myself. (psst! What's a slutty precedent? Can I have one? )
hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 07-05-99
Posts 11105
Glen Hope, PA USA


8 posted 11-11-1999 04:40 PM       View Profile for hoot_owl_rn   Email hoot_owl_rn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit hoot_owl_rn's Home Page   View IP for hoot_owl_rn

Very well written, as always, suthern
suthern
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on the threshold of a dream


9 posted 11-11-1999 04:45 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

PDV: If you don't know, I'm not gonna tell you... the world has enough sluts and I'd rather have your friendship! *G*

Hoot: Thank you!

RG: Who, me? (innocent look) Just cuz I don't wanna miss out on something I richly deserve? *EG*
Marilyn
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since 09-26-1999
Posts 2646
Ontario, Canada


10 posted 11-11-1999 04:52 PM       View Profile for Marilyn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Marilyn

suthern....great writing my friend. Hey...I don't blame you for wanting that spankin...lol.
Nan
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since 05-20-99
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Cape Cod Massachusetts USA


11 posted 11-11-1999 09:13 PM       View Profile for Nan   Email Nan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Nan's Home Page   View IP for Nan

Ya know - You can go just about anywhere you want on that train....
Denise
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12 posted 11-11-1999 09:18 PM       View Profile for Denise   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Denise

This is fabulous, Suthern. I could feel the suffering in this.

------------------
Denise

suthern
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on the threshold of a dream


13 posted 11-11-1999 10:12 PM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

Nan: Thanks... but the train isn't to ride... it's to step in front of! (Which is why 'Deer really doesn't want post-train pictures. *G*)

dsnyder: Thank you very much! *S*

Marilyn: One can always hope... right? *G* Thank you!
WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 07-22-99
Posts 9561
Illinois


14 posted 11-11-1999 11:07 PM       View Profile for WhtDove   Email WhtDove   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit WhtDove's Home Page   View IP for WhtDove

Suthern, you've explained the hurt good, real good! But please don't go stepping in front of any trains now! I know I'd lose my breakfast for sure. LOL...naw...I hope you're feeling better soon, or whatever it is that has you so down...Kick them in the butt!!!! ~HUGS to ya!~
doreen peri
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since 05-25-99
Posts 8028
Virginia


15 posted 11-12-1999 12:11 AM       View Profile for doreen peri   Email doreen peri   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for doreen peri

Hey wait a minute! Did I write this? LOL... just kidding... wish I did.... sounds very familiar.

You have done an excellent job with meter, rhyme, and flow.... not to mention the dynamic of the subject matter.

Well done, indeed!

dp
Isis
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since 09-06-99
Posts 6390
Sunny Queensland


16 posted 11-12-1999 12:30 AM       View Profile for Isis   Email Isis   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Isis's Home Page   View IP for Isis

I know where you are coming from!! I have been there myself a lot on and off in the past 3 years. In the end of your poem is the secret, let it go and move on. A change IS as good as a holiday (or almost!!)

------------------
Through poetry my heart and soul truly sing...
~Isis~
(Daughter of Mystery)

suthern
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on the threshold of a dream


17 posted 11-12-1999 09:40 AM       View Profile for suthern   Email suthern   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for suthern

WhtDove: Thanks, lady. BTW... my pic would make you lose your breakfast even pre-train! LOL.

Doreen & Isis: Thank you very much! (But I'd rather have the holiday! *G*)

Iloveit
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since 09-02-99
Posts 1168
NM


18 posted 11-12-1999 09:45 AM       View Profile for Iloveit   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Iloveit

hey I have it on good authority (mine) that she's fibbing, I have her pics and she's a doll ::
oh......and a great poet.....love this girl
Craig
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since 06-10-99
Posts 882


19 posted 11-12-1999 06:51 PM       View Profile for Craig   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Craig


I liked the flow in this and the feeling. I also like a wallow every now and again so you got me on all points.

Well done.

------------------
Yes, I admit your general rule. That every poet is a fool:
But I myself may serve to show it. That every fool is not a poet.

Alison
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Member Rara Avis
since 01-27-2008
Posts 9055
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!


20 posted 06-02-2008 02:36 AM       View Profile for Alison   Email Alison   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alison

Glad that I peeked in because I like this a lot.

Alison
 
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