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An acrostic pantoum ( with apologies to everyone named Mike )
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An acrostic pantoum ( with apologies to everyone named Mike ) |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
Mike would do what most would not Into the fire when it was hot Kept burning off all of his hair Even all the way down there Into the fire when it was hot Simple Mike did the fox-trot Even all the way down there All the folks would stop and stare Simple Mike did the fox-trot You would think that he forgot All the folks would stop and stare Should have worn some underwear Kept burning off all of his hair Had no idea but he didn't care Into the fire when it was hot Mike would do what most would not |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
I love your rhyme and wit, but, my deer Doc, a pantoum it is not hehe. I'll bring Nan's explanation back to the top for you.  If you'd like some help, please feel free to email me. |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
Munda, I am at a loss . Yes , you are correct that according to Nan's definition I am two stanzas short and also in my final quatrain , 3rd line first stanza becomes first , with first line , first stanza becoming last ,however( there is always one of those), according to "Orca's" reference ( which Nan has used before ) a modern pantoum can be of any length , and this is the format in which this was written . I may be entirely confused on this matter , which is why we usually have a teacher around somewhere , but our's seems to have gone missing . I'll have to wait for a "Final Decision" Doc [This message has been edited by Dr.Moose1 (edited 12-14-2000).] |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Yes I've read several things on Pantoum and noticed "modern" Pantoum can be from 4 to 24 stanza's or any other number you'd like. I've read Pantoum doesn't need to rhyme, as long as you stand by the "rule"of repeating lines and ending with the first line last and the third as number two of the last stanza. LOL Let me tell you a secret... I'm in the workshop to learn as many forms as possible by their "original" rules. I feel when I can "master" a specific form of poetry I may feel confident enough to "play" with the rules. Just a personal opinion. Anyway, it doesn't matter to me "Mike" only has 4 stanza's, but the rhyming scheme is off and your final stanza should be a little different. The rhyming scheme should be: A rhymes to A and B to B, etc. Your finala stanza should be D1 A2 D2 A1 Instaed you used line A2 as the first line of this stanza.  I'd leave Mike as he is though, as he'd get all mixed up if you change him and I'm not sure if he'd be as easy anymore. Anyway, I've seen something "fishy"...  |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
I've read about several kinds of pantoums, so I'm confused. I think we all might be right according to what we have read. Anyway this is hilarious, and an accrostic ,too. That's too mind boggling for me. My brain only stretches so far. A fun read. Liz |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
When does a pantoum become "pantoumish"? or a sonnet become "sonnetish"?... I'm a staunch believer in learning the rules before breaking them... Of course, Doc...You know how to follow the rules - ergo - you know how to break them effectively... *walking away shaking my head here*... |
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Suzanne Arlene Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 377Ontario, Canada |
Well correct or not it is still a funny poem and fun to read. Suzanne |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
Nan , Always has to be some " trouble maker ' in the class doesn't there ? Guilty as charged with the crime of adding to the general confusion . I await sentencing . Doc |
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