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The Christmas Star (Villanelle)
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The Christmas Star (Villanelle) |
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
Alone on this, most holy night amid the holiday delight, a single star is shining bright. As we, who hope to do what’s right ignore the helpless in their plight alone on this, most holy night. God sends his love and all his might, for those who live in urban blight. A single star is shining bright, providing peace and hope, despite, the hunger and despair they fight, alone on this, most holy night. Although no presents to excite, or Christmas trees adorned with light, a single star is shining bright. The spirit soars, and hearts ignite, to witness, such a brilliant sight, Alone on this, most holy night, a single star is shining bright. |
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| © Copyright 2000 Deborah L. Carter - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Debbie ! What can I say? Your Vilanelle really sings !! Wowsa ! |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Debbie Wow! stunning work. I love the way you use an aaa response. Brilliant images also. write on Kethry Why do yesterdays remain and todays pass by ...unnoticed? Rex E. Alford |
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Suzanne Arlene Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 377Ontario, Canada |
OH mine is not this good I better get back to work. Great Job It surely sang to me ....Suzanne [This message has been edited by Suzanne Arlene (edited 11-18-2000).] |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Debbie, just had to come back and tell you how good this is. Have you considered posting this in Isis' Christmas challenge. It would be fabulous exactly was Isis seems to be asking for. Be well Kethry Why do yesterdays remain and todays pass by ...unnoticed? Rex E. Alford |
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Dr.Moose1 Member Elite
since 1999-09-05
Posts 3448Bewilderment , USA |
I agree with the above , this is a very solid piece that flows well . Doc |
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
Munda, Thank-you, I've never written a Villanelle before and it was a challenge! glad you liked it! Kethry, Thank-you! If you think Isis might like it, then I will be glad to post it! As for the aaa rhyme, I wasn't sure if it had to be aba of if I could do it this way! It was challenging to find enough rhyme words! Suzanne and Doc, Thanks for your kind responses! |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Well, Debbie.. For never having written a villanelle, you've done beautifully... a = b and b = a... You've made it doubly difficult by keeping your rhyme scheme so rigidly intact... and your theme is developed beautifully... Your meter has adhered nicely to iambic tetrameter... and I like the use of enjambment... Nice job...  |
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Romy Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1170Plantation, Florida |
Thanks Nan! I didn't think I could figure this out at first, but I tried to follow your notes and I used Balladeer's poem as a guideline! What's next??? |
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