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Epic - Finally
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Epic - Finally |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Ladies and Gentlemen. It is with great pride and joy I hereby present our ‘Stute epic. With my gratitude to all ‘Stute members. I could not have done it without your help. A special "thank you" to Andrew Scott and Gene, for their kindness and help I received behind the scenes. "Hilarious Insanity" aka "A Smile is a Memory Dear" It is my first trip out with the ‘Stute They have asked me, how could I refute They are all wonderful Crazy dudes and damsels And my gratitude is absolute We are out on a mad camping trip All the uncensored Loonies from PIP Nothing like a good joke Suffering a brain poke While we hunt for the monks Dale & Chip ‘Round the campfire here we all sit Taz the Devil turns ‘round on the spit Can you hear him avow "Kick your butts! I’m not chow!" "Can’t you see I am not a rabbit?" Doctor Moose 1 arising with flair He drops Bar-B-Q sauce with ill care "Let this bunny run free! He’s a Devil you see! And besides I prefer my food rare." "Now we have gathered here Justin Thyme To give Lady in Red a swell rhyme ‘Cause we’re no lunatics At most mentally sick So let’s give her a really good time!" "Introduce yourself in a ‘Stute style With the words that will bring forth a smile As she listens with King Ruler of the East Wing Stand and speak! Let your rhymes now beguile!" ~~~~~~~~~~ Dr.Moose1 By way of introduction, I've been here for a while (Elementary deduction Doc, Watson's got more style) I came here quite by accident, a long long time ago (Enough of all this history crap, my lunch is 'bout to blow) I've been accused of many things, most of which aren't true (Oh yeah ! Well just ask Justin N., he's got the dirt on you) You can tell me by my paper hats, I've usually got one on (Why don't you just 'fess up, you're whacked ! You're mind's completely gone!) Some say I'm schizophrenic, I dis-proved that in my thesis (Oh come on ! They'd need a shop-vac to pick up all your pieces!) There are a couple things, to which I'm pre-disposed (Yeah you're certifiable, like your poetry and prose) I'd like to thank all of my friends at the Institute (Will you please get this thing over with, you're one long winded fruit) Without which I have little doubt, I'd just be a recluse And in my present state of confusion, I'd prefer to be Dr.Moose ~~~~~~~~~~ Dear Doc Moose what a story chortle Seems to me you are only mortal Glad you found your home here Where there is joy and cheer As Doc Moose you are now immortal ~~~~~~~~~~ Andrew Scott - The Crayon King Staring at the same four white walls Such things can really get you down So at times we go out on trips To the Corner Pub that’s in town But this time I had heard it said We were going to where it’s green Out amongst the squirrels and bears To play and sing and be obscene I packed all of my best crayons And left behind all of my meds I hope I get to share a tent With the Lady who dresses Red I’m sure that Moose has packed his vest The one that's the brightest orange To keep from being shot by Fudd While he’s doing forest forage I see Red brought some marshmallows I really like to watch them cook How they get that crispy outside And that gooey melted wax look Let us sing some campfire songs And tell a ‘Stute story or two Song or story the screams the same Of which is which I have no clue Last year’s outing was so much fun With brothers Justin Thyme and Kase Who set fire to the bear’s hat And dared squirrels to a nut race This year I have gone natural The way that God intended us I brought only my fanny pack And left all my clothes on the bus Yep! Andrew Scott the Crayon King Shall enjoy this trip in the buff I will face Mother Nature’s worst Perhaps I should ware some earmuffs? Tarzan and George of the Jungle Have got nothing on this ‘Stute King Take cover all forest creatures Because I’ve got the hottest swing I’ll leave my tag on everything As I fly through the canopy Melted crayons my royal seal On every animal and tree So come along with me Lady Juliet how ‘bout you be Jane We two will show these animals Just what it means to be insane ~~~~~~~~~~ My dear King, you have coloured my heart With your crayons and paraffin art To be Jane I’d like much For you I have gone nuts Now forever you are my sweetheart ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin Tolerable I am Justin Tolerable and my name rings true When you’re feeling happiness I'll make you feel quiet blue I yell and scream and throw a fuss Just to get my way I will punch you in the gut Just to make my day I get things that I most want In any way I can Don't you dare get in my way Or tamper with my plan You can never put me down Or put me in my place All you'll ever really do Is get me in your face ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin T. you are often a pain To us all, which is really a shame You play Russian roulette With your own silhouette When you hit endless fame you’ll obtain ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin Nuendo Here’s a story, a little weird, but I swear it is true ! It’s about when we almost lost our Wizard to insanity and paint blue One day at sea, he got caught in a storm he never was much of a sailor It broke his ship and he washed ashore hoping he’d soon find a new tailor He never cared much for the Doc and Nurse C. as they swept overboard and screamed Just smiled the mysterious smile, we all know when the sea burped, although so it seemed He looked around on this lonely isle never found another living soul "I’ll just have to use my magic here for loneliness is not my goal " It would have been a different story if not at that moment had appeared A beast with three heads and a vicious look ! I swear, it even had a beard ! He cried "This is Justin Sayne, Justin Credible I hope I am Justin Thyme to save my precious magical butt ! " Spilling his magic during this time And there we were, created out of magic but we feared our Wizard would leave So we made him recite 85.479 poems a day never gave him a day of sick-leave One day he cried out, in a moment of despair, "Nan where are you when I need you most !" Being in the shower at that particular moment she barely heard the voice of the Wizard’s ghost. Nevertheless she came to the rescue on a Dragon as red as can be what happened next is Justin Credible I’ll never forget it, believe me ! Nan took out her vocabulary starting to recite REAL English to us ! Driving us almost to sanity syllabus after syllabus !!!! YEEK ! We cried out: "This is Justine Uff ! Please take you wizard and go ! " So she threw him over the Dragon while dragon’s fire almost hurt our Micheal Angelo Who was really Justin Thyme to change his name to Leonardo Da Vinci ! and ever since then doesn’t paint anything but in blue like the burping sea Now you know the reason why he hardly shows any of his work today When he thinks back of his time on the isle Magical poems are no longer his forte Wanna know what happened with us Justins ? I know life sometimes is rude Doc Moose and Nurse Crachet washed ashore And now we are known as the Stute ! ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin N. an astonishing tale Made this up without first a cocktail ? No exaggeration ? What imagination ! Are you quite sure you’re not a female ? ~~~~~~~~~~ A Welcome To The Lady in Red By Bugs Bunny Bugs Bunny’s hoppin’ in to say to you A great big welcome to our family A little nuts some say we are that’s true But sweeter Looney-Toons you’ll never see. We watch out for each other in the ‘Stute We’ve made it quite the warm and cozy place A home away from home none can refute You’ve Justin Thyme reserved a first class space. Now Justin Kace you feel a little shy I’ll gladly introduce you all around To all the folks so fine in great supply Like Crayon King, Snow White and dwarfs I’ve found. A doc called Moose, a nurse named Crachet, too And Tweety Bird and Lancelot the Knight A Wicked Witch and all the Justin crew Will make you feel at home with all their might. Just watch out for some dude named Elmer Fudd He is the only one you need to fear He fancies he’s a lady’s man – a stud He even hit on Lady Guinevere Relax now dear, enjoy your barbecue We’ll roast some shrimp, grill burgers and some steak As long as no one’s cravin’ rabbit stew Or Taz, this picnic here, I won’t forsake. ~~~~~~~~~~ The most funny Loon - Toon must be you A bit nuts perhaps, that much is true Love to see you hop ‘round On this greenish ‘Stute ground Careful NOT to be shared Bar-B-Q ~~~~~~~~~~ Elmer Fudd Dear Wady in Wed , Well I weally don't bewong here Onwy visit fwom time to time One of the other woonies Keeps besting me at whymes I'll never give up twying though No siwwee I'll win someday 'Fwaid of that big stoopid Moose In your dweams that's what I say Nope , I'll just keep on twying Evwybody says he's fwipped Maybe we could get together 'pose you give Andwew the swip What you ever saw in him's A mystewy to me Do yourself a favor Wed You can't beat thwee foot thwee Heh Heh Heh Heh Heh ~~~~~~~~~~ Good to see you here too Mister Fudd They have told me you think you’re a stud I am faithful to King He’s got THE Pelvis swing A good stew he does love ! Watch your butt !! ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin Ebriated And They Wonder Why I Drink My daddy's locked up in the joint. My mother's on the rag. My sister is a streetwalker who's living from a bag. My cousin's name is Justin Thyme, he's locked up in the 'Stute. And so's his brother, Justin Kace this fact he'd soon refute. My sister, Justine Ormous, she's a burglar in DC. And Justin Sayne, my uncle -- he sometimes thinks he's me. My other uncle Justin Uff, he's hanging with a gang. And my aunt Jest (that's Shirley U.) just stole a blue Mustang. Justin Denial, my big bro, is very much my friend! Justin the nick of Thyme, he came, with bottles full again! And people wonder why I drink and drown out all my cares-- when Justin Sayne, my other cousin stole our MS shares! That stock today could make us rich! (Well, Bill is rich as hell!). But Justin Kace you didn't know, he first stole then said, "Sell!" Within a day, that Justin Sayne sold out our second chance! And then my uncle, Justin Trude, refused to take a stance! See, Justin Trude, he was a judge elected by the state. But he eloped and disappeared-- t'was too much on his plate. "Our family's too dysfunctional", my uncle Justin said. And then he ran off with this whore and landed Justin Bed. They say to be Anonymous would help my mind to think of why I have decided that I have to take a drink! Well, here and now, I'm telling you I think that they are blind! They just don't know no families that are the Justin kind. They call us Justins horrible... a screwed up, awful bunch. And then they wonder why I drink.... I'm drinking them for lunch! ~~~~~~~~~~ A sad story indeed. What abuse ! Being quarry you cannot but lose Always pull up your stakes With your only escape To be drowned in Old Glory and booze ~~~~~~~~~~ Nurse Crachet Well, this is quite funny I'm here with Bugs Bunny, Bashful, Snow White, Elmer Fudd, Rapunsel, Tweety, & Sylvester, Unknown Poet, all the Justin's sorry I don't think you want a list, and I forgot my Laptop unless ONE FLEW OVER did his usually swiping act. What are you sitting on over there that looks so familiar? Don't worry no need to go there now, this weekend is for fun. Don't worry Doc Moose I see you cooking marshmallows for us all to have Smores, and Andrew my dear sweet, I see you cuddling up to my darling daughter Juliet, and those are mighty nice Wizard pajama's Andrew. I want this to be fun but not dangerous so the sleeping quarters will be gender segregated. there's two cabins one for guys, and you guessed it one for the gals. Bashful will be in charge of the guys cabin and of course I will uphold the gals cabin. In the morning we’ll all meet under the Pavilion over there to have our breakfast and plan for the days activities. ~~~~~~~~~~ Hello Crachet who is Kindheart too Never thought you could split up in two Does it hurt very much To feel Kindheart’s kind touch Or is she just your alter ego ? ~~~~~~~~~~ Bashful I am timid, shy and scared Lost from love and unprepared I will always hide about Watching people play and shout You won't see my color true Red is such a pretty hue I wear it well upon my face It's always there and with such grace Rarely will you see my face Running free around this place I hide behind the rubber tree That is where I want to be. ~~~~~~~~~~ Here we have the most lovable guy Who no doubt is a tiny bit shy If I’d kiss your red cheek Would you think I’m a freak ? Or your blushing just intensify ? ~~~~~~~~~~ Cheshire Grin Fiddle dee dee And me makes me three The Grin, The Cat, The Tale Chasing Milk Duds all day Whittling hours away Skeining yarn with his tail The Yellow Brick Road Is yellow, you know For the world is my sand box On blankets I shed On Nurse Cratchet's bed My grin immune to her locks If the Lady in Red Would scritch my head Right behind the ears I'd hide all the pills They put in the swill To keep at bay your fears ~~~~~~~~~~ A Cheshire Grin, well how about that Fiddle dee dee, the Grin, what a Cat A cat with swing and sway We truly hope he'll stay He is a Kit-cat aristoCrAT My goodness, an authentic Cheshire For what more can this Lady desire What a beauty he is He will be a real bliss ‘Round my shoulders for all to admire I’ll let you have a real Cheshire nap Every day on the Lady Red’s lap A scratch behind your ears A gorgeous grin appears Never again we will need dude-traps This ‘Stute tree you may call your new home Your Personal Cheshire Hippodrome A Venus’s flytrap ? A catnip for nightcap ? You’ll be the PURfect CATastrophe ~~~~~~~~~~ ONE FLEW OVER Oh me, oh my, I'll slap that fly before he lands on your thigh. Wha what, wh who am I? I'm ONE FLEW OVER been here longer than Crachet, I gave her a bed of clover. My cage couldn't hold me anymore I always found an open door. I taught the Justin's all they know some of the other's were a bit slow. When Crachet arrived everything changed everyone became quite deranged. I can throw a pie a mile and a half and don't you dare even laugh. Food fights are my perfection and it gets me quite a lot of affection. When you see me Lady in Red just make sure you duck under the bed. ~~~~~~~~~~ Oh golly, a food fight I love it ! With pies all gooey, my favourite I like them flying high Through the air by and by Didn’t mean that to be a full hit !  ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin Sayne This campfire is Justin Sayne Who are these loonies here? They've all escaped and they should be Back in the ‘Stute, I fear. We're Justin Thyme to gather them To bring them back again Their beds are made and dinner's served Let's get back in the van. They're huddled here to tell their tale They're all Justin Secure Let's all go back to where it's safe Lobotomy's the cure. There's Justin Kace with Justin Thyme Where ever he now goes Before we go let's take some Thyme To toast these marshmallows ~~~~~~~~~~ I am pleased, although it is insane You are worried so much ‘bout our pain But let me tell you dear There is nothing to fear Lobotomy’s been sent down the drain ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin Kace Now Justin Kace my brother has Some trouble in the world I have to go along with him As freedom is unfurled We never know what lurks ahead What obstacles we'll meet But Justin Kace a problem brews I fend off all the heat. So, Justin Thyme, I'm always there To help you out, my bro' No matter what may happen next I'll be there, you must know. So tell your tale in record Thyme Then we must hit the road No Thyme to rest for we must now Get in the travelin' mode. ~~~~~~~~~~ I’m so glad I caught you just in time Before you will take off with bro’ Thyme When the road you do hit Make sure you’ll bring your wit To continue this runaway crime ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin Thyme A Thymeless Story as Told to the Lady in Red by Ghost of Thyme in Front of the Campfire: or "Juliet, Juliet, Wherefore Art Though, Juliet?" Thyme and Thyme Again This Thyme is asked how Thyme came to the 'Stute. Well, Lady Red, I've told the tale so much, it just ain't cute! Thyme Marches on, you can't deny, and so I left that place. I've disappeared, I am not here, you do not see my face. Free Thyme, you see, was what I sought, because I won't be jailed. So, as you sit around the fire my ship it long since sailed. Spare Thyme is something no-one has when trapped behind the walls with Cratchet, Moose, and all the rest and when the lunch bell calls. And so it was, my lady dear About Thyme that I fled. When you get back to that darned 'Stute, you won't see me in bed! Thyme Out! I screamed! I'd had enough of jackets straight with lace. I ducked behind ol' Cratchet's skirt and skipped out of that place. There's no Thyme Zone which could hold me so Justin Carcerated. I'm gone, my dear, this Ghost of Thyme ain't here! And I'm elated! When you return to that Thyme Share and think you're on vacation, remember Justin Thyme ain't there! I hit the first train station! I checked my Thyme Piece as I split to synchronize my leaving. So if Nurse Cratchet asks for me, please tell her to stop grieving! I was a Thyme Bomb, Lady Red, 'twas ready for exploding. So it was best I bolted out my fate it was foreboding. Today I punch a Thyme Clock where the books are stacked forever. Where am I now? Well, I won't tell! Not at the 'Stute! No, never! Thyme Lapse Photography gave me a view of future waiting.... and so, Ms. Red, I did decide I'm finished with inmating. The Thyme Keeper cannot hold me, I'm Thyme Released, dear lady. Arrived On Thyme to be set free I'm in another statey! So Set the Thyme of all the clocks in 'Stuteland, I'll not be there. I Bought on Thyme my freedom, dear, and you will not find me there! Half-Thyme, they live within the 'Stute; Three-Quarter Thyme, their music. No Doing Thyme for me, Ms. Red, Tee Thyme for me, or loose it! But Often Thyme I feel alone, Thyme Periods of blueness. A Thyme Traveler of life, I am, I'm not used to this newness. The Thyme Table of when I spent my days with all those loonies.... makes me look forward to Nap Thyme out here in the free boonies! Thyme Was, they called me, "Dinner Thyme" to 'Stute's own cafeteria. But indigestion often came because of the hysteria. It's High Thyme that I left that place! I'm here for the Thyme Being. In Good Thyme you might see my face outside the 'Stute, when fleeing. From Thyme to Thyme, remember me when you've had your Thyme Limit. In No Thyme, you could be here, too! Grab a flashlight and dim it! At Night Thyme, when they're all asleep, when 'Stute Life Thyme, you tire... At the Same Thyme, Thyme on Your Hands, escape this hot campfire! (PS: I'm having the Thyme of My Life! Let me know your Thyme Table for to breaking free!) signed, Justin Thyme aka Leonardo DaVinci, Artiste Extraordiniare, recent escapee. ~~~~~~~~~~ Justin Thyme I’m so happy you’re safe I’ve heard rumours you’re a galley-slave One was really in tears For your life she did fear Yes, I speak of your own Miss Behave ~~~~~~~~~~ Justine Uff This really has been Justine Uff Of Justin Saynity I know there is a better plan Than ‘Stute's posterity I think I'll hide out Justin Kace I won't get in that van Disguise myself here Justin Thyme And not return again. Wait up my brothers, wait for me Let's be Justin Cahoots We'll forge ahead, both far and near But not Justin Stitute. ~~~~~~~~~~ Just before all you Justins are flown Like to read you this note from Unknown When you’ve had Justine Uff Of this so called "free" stuff Please return, we will not let you down ~~~~~~~~~~ The Unknown Poet Life on the Outside When I told them I would break out, They told me I wasn't too smart. Guess they were right, cause every night I'm hangin' out at the Wal-Mart. Life on the outside ain't easy. There's never nothin' to do here. Ho hum, boredum, all for freedom, The price is much too steep, I fear. So I go here and I go there, But where am I, really? I never end up anywhere I really can be me. A straitjacket of conformation, I could never meet the "norm". I'm society's affirmation Of failed reform. Wal-Mart canned me for being lewd, And, well, that's when I realized How much I miss cafeteria food, Hey, I'm institutionalized. I'm feigning for a mental shock, God knows I need the gloom. Just slam the door and latch that lock, I miss my rubber room! ~~~~~~~~~~ I am glad to the ‘Stute you returned In one piece, slighty red from sunburn Hope you’ll make it real soon To your favourite room All that rubber ! No longer adjourn ! ~~~~~~~~~~ Lady in Red ~ Juliet I am glad I came on this trip You gave me a really good time I love the lunatics from PIP This epic is beyond all rhymes ! You gave me a really good time While I sat here list’ning with King This epic is beyond all rhymes A story quite astonishing While I sat here list’ning with King I thought my heart would burst of pride A story quite astonishing It’s better than the Zone Twillight I thought my heart would burst of pride And not a single word untrue ! It’s better than the Zone Twillight I’m honoured to be part of you And not a single word untrue ! This epic is beyond all rhymes I’m honoured to be part of you You gave me a really good time This epic is beyond all rhymes ! I love the lunatics from PIP You gave me a really good time I am glad I came on this trip ~~~~~~~~~~ I have listened to stories from you All of them were most certainly chow To this Lady's weird mind Thank you all very kind Hope some day we will make a new show Behind this outburst poetically Are all poets from PIP you can’t see Who express themselves with An unusual wit Playing word games to let their minds flee Yes of course we are all very sane We just love to play lunatic games Give each other a smile ‘Spite the thousands of miles And without knowing each other’s name Does this tale have morality too ? But of course ! I will tell it to you Do you think we’re all nuts ? Sit all day on our butts ? I assure you we have morals too ! You may think: "Too long out in the sun" "In the ‘Stute they won’t harm anyone" But who needs to be sound To hear words so profound "Start each day with a smile and some fun." All you Ladies and Gentlemen dear Let me tell you without any fear For as long as you smile Life is more than worth while For each smile is a memory dear Without laughter you don’t truly live You will only receive what you give Laughter comes from within It’s the soul’s harlequin To bring smiles on a face is a gift Let me leave you with one final tip My advise to you all here at PIP Please barge in any time To enjoy a good rhyme Think you’ll leave with a smile ‘round your lips Lady in Red Juliet |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Whew! You sure put alot of work into this Munda! I don't know how you did it! I guess now you can go to sleep for about a week! Great job! Denise |
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